is co-sleeping common?

(102 Posts)
ForbiddenFruitt Sun 23-Dec-12 17:29:15

I never did it, never even contemplated it. I had the moses basket right next to the side of the bed instead.

Two good friends have babies under 12m and they both co-sleep.

Not judging if people do it, just wondering whether it is quite common?

BertieBotts Sun 23-Dec-12 17:43:00

It's quite taboo, I think it's quite uncommon to do it. Certainly it's uncommon to make a conscious choice to - although lots of people do it "informally" either on occasion or regularly, but out of necessity. I think I read a survey which said 75% of parents do at some point?

FrillyMilly Sun 23-Dec-12 17:44:08

I think it is more common than people admit. I co sleep with my 4 year old and 1 year old. I didn't intend for this to happen. They both have their own beds but I doubt DC2 will ever sleep in the lovely cotbed. Me and DH both work and we do what ensures a good nights sleep all round.

FrillyMilly Sun 23-Dec-12 17:45:02

I also know people who are adamant their child will not get in their bed yet will sleep on a child's bedroom floor.

SneakyNuts Sun 23-Dec-12 17:45:44

I do, but I don't know anyone that does.

carabos Sun 23-Dec-12 17:46:41

I have two German friends, both single parents, both with sons of 11, both co-sleeping. Seems a bit odd to me at that age but there you go.

We co-slept with DS2 until I stopped bf when he was 27 months. He hasn't been back in our bed since.

I did and still do dd is nearly 3.6. I freely admit if anyone asks too.I couldn't care less about what anyone else says.
Although I was brought up in India where it the norm.

HearMyRoar Sun 23-Dec-12 17:50:33

About half of parents in the uk bed share at some point before their baby is 3 months stats here

This is just for the UK of course. In many, if not most, other countries it is far more common. Certainly having your baby in a separate room is a very recent thing and peculier to the west, not sure about having them in another bed but in the same room.

Cantbelieveitsnotbutter Sun 23-Dec-12 17:51:37

We only started it when ds was 1 and started getting in our bed in the night without waking us up! Before that we'd be scared of crushing him.

BigShinyBaubles Sun 23-Dec-12 17:52:15

I did with all of my 3ds. Didn't have any problems getting them in their cots in their own rooms when they were a little older.

VelvetSpoon Sun 23-Dec-12 17:53:12

I did it, but I know none of my RL friends did.

When I've mentioned it before in front of people it tends to attract the hmm face.

Most people I know had babies who slept through the night from a few months, in their own rooms, so co-sleeping probably seems a bit strange.

notnagging Sun 23-Dec-12 17:57:40

I start the night by putting everyone in their beds, by the morning I usually have the youngest 2 at least in my bed. Sometimes I'm too tired to tell them to leave.

OvOinAManger Sun 23-Dec-12 17:58:01

I would say more people didn't/don't cosleep than did/do out of the people I know.

I still cosleep with my 5 year old. I find it weird trying to sleep without him there now. He's my wee hot water bottle.

mrscogon34thstreet Sun 23-Dec-12 18:02:07

I co slept with DS between 2 and 8 weeks, and occasionaly now if he has an unsettled night. Most people I know have done at least some cosleeping. If you think about it it's the most natural place (even if it's not as safe as a moses basket next to you) for a baby to sleep as when we lived in 'nature' years ago you would have wanted to protect your baby from animals and cold in the night, so it kind of makes sense that babies sleep better right next to their Mum.

I don't in general, not with DD (2yo) or DS (7wo). But the occasional night, perhaps when they weren't sleeping / poorly etc. then I did, but more by accident than anything else.
I did in the hospital too, although I know I probably shouldn't have. I know the midwife wasn't impressed when she caught me with DD, but again it was an accident. She didn't sleep and instead of waking everyone else up, she just rested in the crook of my arm and we both fell asleep.
No one caught me with DS grin

Shellywelly1973 Sun 23-Dec-12 18:03:04

I think many parents end up desperate for sleep & end up cosleeping through exhaustion!

Bicnod Sun 23-Dec-12 18:05:45

I did it sporadically with DS1 and didn't even bother trying to get DS2 to settle in the moses basket.

Co-sleeping saved me with both boys when they were newborns.

Doesn't happen now though unless DS2 is having a particularly bad night.

tittytittyhanghang Sun 23-Dec-12 18:05:54

In the world, I would have thought it fairly common. Uk, not so much. I did it but dont know much other people who did.

ForbiddenFruitt Sun 23-Dec-12 18:11:53

I do let them stay in our bed if they aren't well or have got scared in the night

but if it was regular then I know that our relationship would suffer, and our sex life would be non-existent.

But that is just me and dh.

5madthings Sun 23-Dec-12 18:13:04

We have co-slept with ours after three years if crap sleep with ds1 we werent prepared to fo that again so opted to co-sleep and got rid of the cot. Youngest is 24mths and im our bed.

I know people in rl that do it and have had the odd judgey comment, mainly from family but it has worked for us and once dd is in her own bed it will feel very strange tbh as we have been co-sleeping with one child or another for the last 13yrs!

bradywasmyfavouritewiseman Sun 23-Dec-12 18:14:55

I did with dd. She used to get in our bed at about 3am right up til she was 4.
Ds on other hand refused to. Even as a new born he would not co sleep. He hated it. Slept better in his moses basket. He still never gets in our bed. Even for a cuddle on a morning. He wants to go straight downstairs.
I miss it. I loved dd being in our bed.

But on the upside. Ds slept through better than dd and sleeps 14 hours now. So it feels like normality has returned.

Ds is 22 months.

LilyVonSchtupp Sun 23-Dec-12 18:14:56

I agree that it is more common than most people admit. Almost everyone I know has done it at least a few times. I also know some single parents whose kids slept with them until teen years.

My DS refused to sleep anywhere else until about 9 mos old and still usually comes in with us at weekends hmm I personally think its a nice thing now and then but not all the time.

Sorry to bring class into it AGAIN but I do think it might be more of a working class thing. When I was growing up no one batted an eyelid and DSis told me to 'buy a bigger bed' when she first knew I was PG. In the NCT circles of north London however, it is talked about in Hushed Tones. grin

Procrastinating Sun 23-Dec-12 18:22:05

I do it every night but I don't know anyone else who does. I have slept with all 3 of my dc and now it is either the 3 year old or the 7 year old who shares my bed. The other two are in with their father.
I think this makes us very wierd, but I like it and we all sleep well.

I don't know how long it will continue with the 7 year old, until he doesn't want to I suppose.

I never did with dd and ds1. I was so scared I'd squish them in my sleep!

With ds2 however my need for sleep appears to be greater and I trust myself more. I don't sleep well when we co-sleep but I do get some sleep. I doubt it will be a very regular thing though. (he's only 2 weeks old atm).

Startail Sun 23-Dec-12 18:22:55

I didn't with FF DD1 because she was the most spectacular fidget.

Co slept bits of most nights with BF DD2 because she just snuggled up in the crook of my arm and slept.

Sometimes she stayed all night more often after an hour or to she'd happily go to her crib my the bed or her cot in her room when bigger.

soupmaker Sun 23-Dec-12 18:26:55

Before having DD I was adamant no child would sleep in our bed! I was even very scornful of mothers who did.

DD slept in a Moses basket, then cot in our room and eventually moved to her own. I've had her in bed with us loads, or just with me if DH heads to the spare room, when she's been poorly, unsettled, or just wanted a cuddle in the night. She is now nearly 5. And nearly every morning comes in for a cuddle.

Loads of my friends in RL were shock when I said I co-slept on occasion but secretly admitted to it later!

I love that she comes into our bed for a family cuddle in the morning.

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