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Secondary education

Foreign Exchange Visits

56 replies

Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 09:47

Are they important? Do you have to have one if your child is studying the language and it is offered?
If DS doesn't do it will he be the only one?

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LoopaDaLoopa · 07/11/2013 09:48

Massively useful for language learning. Very sadly not done much any more. Definitely, definitely should seize the opportunity if offered.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 09:52

Mmmm. I am having a wibble about it.

DS1 (14) is not the most confident and chatty of people and the thought of having a French student here for a week fills me with dread.

I don't think he will cope well at all staying with a host family in France for a week.

We don't have a spare bedroom and our house is quite compact.

It's £290

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LoopaDaLoopa · 07/11/2013 09:55

Seriously, it's worth it.

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BigBoobiedBertha · 07/11/2013 09:56

Yes, agree. I did it as a teenager, it was the only residential trip I did as it was relatively cheap. I assume you mean the type of exchange where you go and live with a French family and their child comes back to stay with you?

I wouldn't say it is important as such - you wouldn't be a failure at French if you didn't do it - but it is a brilliant opportunity. It isn't just about the language but being able immerse yourself in real French life rather than being a tourist.

I wouldn't have thought all the children do it. It is a big commitment in terms of money and also having a stranger to come and stay in your home for a week or whatever it is.

I think your DS should do it but I don't think he has to do it. I suspect plenty won't. There is a probably a limit imposed by the school too because the children have to chaperoned over the Channel like any other trip.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 09:57

Thanks Loopa. I think a family discussion needs to be had. it's not until next summer but the school want the deposit etc.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 09:59

Yes, that's the sort Big. i think DS1 like the idea of it but the reality may not be great.

I have heard a few scary stories of sullen foreign teenagers that don't want to do anything, and the language barrier being quite stressful for the other family members.

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ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2013 10:00

DD is going on a German exchange next month - she seems to be looking forward to it, I must admit I'm not really looking forward to having the partner back next Spring - but at least this way round hopefully DD will find out what the kid likes to eat etc.

I think it'll probably be very good for DD though.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 10:06

Are you concerned that she might come back and say the German girl isn't very nice Errol?

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ajandjjmum · 07/11/2013 10:08

Both DC went on school exchanges to South Africa - by themselves - and had the most amazing 6 weeks. Of course, there weren't the language issues, but they had to adapt to different cultures and get to know new people.

I knew that DS would cope, even if he didn't enjoy it - although he did. DD I was a little more unsure of, and yet she got far more out of the experience, and it really grew her confidence. She also made some wonderful friends.

They were both 16.

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BigBoobiedBertha · 07/11/2013 10:09

Sorry cross posted with your second post there.

I wasn't at all confident and was very shy as a teenager but I coped OK. I suppose it was easier for me as I did the trip to France after they did the trip over here, the first time I did it. I knew the girl I was exchanging with.

You might get a surly teenager but on the other hand you might get one who is lovely. I am still sort of friends with my French penfriend (as they were back then) to this day, 35 years later. We correspond and play FB games on Facebook a bit. We went to each others weddings too 20+ yrs ago. On the whole, whilst I think I have the longest running relationship with my French friend, nobody I knew had a bad experience.

Don't forget they shouldn't be total strangers. You are supposed to strike up a relationship with the other child before you meet. That must be so much easier with FB, email etc than it was in our day when it took a week for an airmail letter to get from here to France.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 10:10

I think if DS was 16 I would feel better aj he isn't 15 until the summer. I have read the letter and it is open to all in Years 9, 10 and 12. I wonder if he takes it at A Level we could do it then?

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Bonsoir · 07/11/2013 10:12

If your school is practised at exchanges, it may be brilliant. DSS2 did an exchange to Canada and one to Spain with his school and loved both of them - but they were both hyper well-organised, had been going on for years etc.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 10:13

What about my lack of spare room and compact home?

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GaryTheTankEngine · 07/11/2013 10:15

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GaryTheTankEngine · 07/11/2013 10:17

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 10:18

I just imagine some of them going to huge houses with their own room and ensuite. Grin

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GaryTheTankEngine · 07/11/2013 10:21

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BigBoobiedBertha · 07/11/2013 10:36

My exchange family had a small house and my French counterpart slept on a camp bed and I had her room. Agree that they will need their own room but don't worry about en suites and all that. They are just average French people like you and any of us really. Some will be better off than others. In my day they seemed to try and match you both in personality and also background. Both my father and the French father were postmen so none of us were expecting anything grand.

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PetiteRaleuse · 07/11/2013 10:43

Very worth it. I did an exchange with a boy and popped my cherry and it gave me a life long love of France and French. I left the UK as soon as I could and still live in France now, with a French DH and DC. Which might put you off. I learned so much during those two weeks and other than language skills it stopped me being a fussy eater, made me much more independent and, I think in the long run a better person. It's so good for teens to leave their comfort zone and open up to other cultures. Don't worry about the small room.

Errol I think your DD is at the same school I was. Don't worry reading my post, mine was organised via a teacher but wasn't the official school French exchange. She will be much better supervised than I was :o

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wordfactory · 07/11/2013 11:24

Both my DC have done exchanges and they have been fab.

Very well organised. Excellent price.

Lovely laid back kids staying here, both my DC treated wonderfully by their French families.

Not only was it a good opportunity to speak the language, but moreover it opened everyone's eyes as to just how different life is just afew short hours away.

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BigBoobiedBertha · 07/11/2013 11:26

It is nice to know they are still going on. My old school, now DS1's school doesn't seem to do them any more which is a real shame. The chance to taste real French (or other nationality) life at a relatively low cost.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 11:33

Seems like they are a good idea (ignores popping cherry bit Grin ) I need to decide whether it's right for DS1.

He has past form for being v enthusiastic for things up until the point they actually happen IYKWIM.

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breatheslowly · 07/11/2013 11:45

I did one and really hated it. The girl I exchanged with went to bed at 8.30 every night and we didn't do anything in the evenings. I also just didn't like her.

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Sparklingbrook · 07/11/2013 12:02

I have hear tales like that breathe One Mum was telling me about pouring over google translate a lot while trying to get the guest to engage with them.

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wordfactory · 07/11/2013 12:08

Well Iguess you could end up with a very quiet one.

We have been lucky, both times.

That said, it pays (big time) to organise and plan. Hopefully school will arrange lots of activities to keep everyone busy and for the remaining time just do as much stuff as you can so there is limited time just smiling politely at one another.

I also adviced my two that when they went to France they should occassionally make themselves scarse, particularly if conversation is flagging, by popping up to their room for a breather.

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