My stepson is in yr5. He is very bright, loves learning facts and reading, and is finding lots of the stuff at primary unchallenging. He is also prone to getting disruptive and lazy when bored, and has some social issues which the school feel merit referral to a communication clinic. These are currently manifesting in him telling other kids they're not as clever as he is and not getting why they might not like to hear this. He has had a very tough few years personally so gets cut some slack for that by adults but obviously this is not good behaviour. He has a small group of friends who have similar interests but does lack peers who are as intellectually curious as him. Although his primary is Outstanding, their efforts are focused at getting everyone to level 5, so kids like my SS, who are already way beyond that, don't get much attention.
So, secondary. All our state options are large SE comprehensives, many of which are single sex. The most likely for him are Harris Boys on Peckham Rye, Forest Hill Boys or Kingsdale. We are very concerned that he will end up overlooked and increasingly disruptive at these schools, and without the individual understanding that you get at primary, will become a real problem. We also aren't sure how likely he is to find friends at these schools - we genuinely don't know what the range of pupils is like, as so many people in our area seem to send bright kids to private schools.
We can't remotely afford private schooling, and are both slightly against it in principle, but he does have a trust fund. We have already inquired about the possibility of them paying school fees but they have said they will only pay a small contribution and we would have to take them to court if we want more. We are willing to do this if it's in his best interests but we just don't know. It seems he would get challenged more, is more likely to find kindred spirits and would get greater pastoral support but we could be plain wrong.
I went to a very good comprehensive in the home counties which was a pretendy private school and my husband went to a very rough comprehensive in the north east and we both went on to very good higher educations and interesting careers and we would like the same for SS but he is much more complicated than either of us were!
So advice would be really welcome. He has expressed a preference for private school but it's not particularly well informed and mostly comes from the fact that his primary school friend is probably going to one (not one we would think of owing to distance). Time is ticking away as he will have to sit entrance tests this autumn and would probably need tutoring. We have been trying to get an answer out of his trustees since last summer and only got their final decision this week.
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Secondary education
No idea what to do re state v private in SE London
43 replies
StiffyByng · 21/04/2013 13:50
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