relate- what happens at first appointment?

[bbmad]

Finally plucked up the courage to phone and we are going on Thursday.

[essbee]

Message withdrawn

[bbmad]

Thanks. Although we both want to stay together we have a real problem with communication - constant bickering - can't take much more! We never seem to have a "normal" conversation anymore. Hoping someone neutral may be able to point us in the right direction

[lou33]

It will be a one hour appointment where they will take some basic details down and ask you both what the problems are that you feel are affecting your relationship, and you will discuss them for a while. Then when the hour is up, they will tell you how to put yourself on the list for a proper regular counselling session

Am going with dh atm, so good luck

[lou33]

they su[[lu big boxes of tissues now essbee

[lou33]

supply

[bbmad]

Thanks lou. Dh is not as keen to go as me but is going to give it a shot. Secretly I think he belives the problem is all mine and if we just had sex more often everything would be ok! Doesn't seem to understand you need to have some sort of communication first!

[lou33]

there is always one who is more keen to go. I wanted to go for ages, and dh was reluctant, but now we are actually going, i dread it coming round, but dh sees it as a cathartic exercise i think.

One tip we picked up from them so far though, is to never discuss the session for a day after you leave, as it is emotional and draining enough as it is.

[bbmad]

Thanks for the tip. After the initial appointment how often are the sessions? Is it up to us or the counsellor?

[lou33]

after the initial assessment it's weekly, though i guess you could make it longer in between if you wanted, but that's the norm. Depending on when you can be free for appointments, you can wait up to 6 weeks for a regular slot. You will have more luck getting seen sooner if you can do a daytime session tbh. We did that and only waited 2 weeks for our regular slot