The post was very "poor me" but the difficulty is telling who is depressed and who is using it as an excuse for bad behaviour - both GPs and psychiatrists get that wrong as do family and friends.

Not easy especially as the symptoms are easily available online to help a manipulative person develop a story that fits.

nifty has said it is her H. It really wasn't mine, but it was enough to fool me. What terrified me most was that, that is how he would have reacted 8 months ago. A lot of work later (by him) to be faced with that... denial I suppose is the word, was too much to contemplate.

She has already posted about an H with very similar symptoms.

Nifty's been through 7 years of this. 7.

I can't even imagine what that is like.

And it's so easy to believe the honeyed words when you haven't lived with them.

My H, at his worst, would call up my friends and relatives and tell them how sorry he was. Then come home and... let's just say "Not be nice to me"

fanjo you have no idea of the history, and honestly I cannot see how you would think that would be appropriate behaviour in any circumstances!!

I spent a long time with an EA man, and have since done a lot of reading, research into this (as a medic as well), and honestly think this is something that if you havent experienced first hand is incredibly difficult to understand!

I actually agree with the poster above who siad that depression is overdiagnosed (as a GP myself), and these men are incredibly manipulative even of medical staff!

Hasn't niftyblue said that it was her dh on the other thread or am I confused?

but having said that, you don't seem that circumspect either so maybe you want him to see your posts? you do say you're not bothered about him reading it, just that he did so without you? i don't really get that.

it does seem an enormously unlikely coincidence tbh.

Exactly perfectstorm. The simple explanation is usually the correct one.

"Who me?" is typical from these kind of abusers too.

Okay, sorry, but I've just sat down and thought - wtf?

One possibility is that some random troll serendipitously and miraculously happened upon your thread. This troll, instead of posting their own shit-stirring drama-llama tale of woe (with far longer potential for drama, given you'd turn up and out them here fairly rapidly) decided it would be better to read up all your previous, pre-name-change threads from a year or so ago (which would make them psychic, too) and those of your husband, before posting an exact mimicry of his style, and with total familiarity with your personal circumstances to the point that even you were convinced.

Another is that your husband posted, yet again, and is now fucking with you on the subject.

Tell me, which sounds more likely?

I also agree with Dittany , please protect yourself.

"From my POV he has already said these things to me, and I responded along the lines of "The words are well and good, but I need to see the actions"

Um, no offence, but if it wasn't him, how could he word-for-word parrot your DH's party line?