we live on the continent and have done for the last year or so and with my husbands work this is likely to continue. my relationship with PIL's is not so good now - has been better in the past but for a number of reasons it is not very good now. this is not helped by having to stay in one another's houses for the week or so when they come here or we go to them. i telephoned MIL last night and we got round to talking about a few things (bank accounts and stuff i need to do if we come back to the UK at Xmas) and she said "so you're coming here then" now DH and i have talked about us going back at Xmas as we had last xmas here with DD and it was a bit lonely on our own. i thought DH had talked to PIL's about us going back but obviously had not. i have no family so the only place we do go back to is PIL's house and i felt quite unwelcome when she said that - but her manner if often like that.
my general question is - should i get involved in ensuring DC's see their grandparents and DH's family or should i just leave it to him. it is left to me to organise things such as travel and stuff but should i just stop getting involved and leave them all to it. i want the children to see them frequently and PIL's very much enjoy seeing the children but i feel like i am seen as organising/intefering and i just don't feel welcome - but should i put those feelings aside or should i leave huband to arrange our visits and time with his parents and family?
I was asked by MIL via my husband to send photos and cards to them and one of MIL's friends which I did. I also sent cards and photos of children to DH's sister and I got no email, tel call or even message through his mother to thank me. None of this will get done if left to husband so even though I feel they don't show any thanks should I continue to do for my children's sake an put my own feelings to one side?
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should I get DH to arrange visits and contact with in laws?
2 replies
nicetomeetyou · 05/08/2009 12:48
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