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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

No money and dp has brought a wii game for £130quid

35 replies

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 22:49

My dp has not had much work since before xmas. Say 4 weeks work max, he's self-employed. I work part-time at weekends.

We are in serious financial trouble, loads of debt, loans & credit cards that haven't been paid since before christmas.

Every month we've been struggling to get the mortgage money.

He applied for a credit card last week, for emergencies, he said. Then started going on about buying guitar hero game for wii for £130.

He's so selfish. I never have anything or the kids, but we've argued about buying it for days and today he ordered it off of amazon.

He hasn't had money to pay any child maintenance to his first ex since christmas, but he thinks he deserves the game!!!!

I'm so angry. We have a ds 1, i have a dd 5 and he has a ds 7.

How can he not work regulary but think this is ok?

Giving him the cold shoulder. But not sure how what to do? Nothing I say obviously matters.

Also when it arrives, he's going to sit on his arse playing it, giving him less incentive to get work, whilst we struggle to pay the bills & the creditors come after our home.

My car is breaking down, keeps overheating. can't afford to take kids on days out!! But all value food shopping. My dd can't have school dinners.

He is due a tax rebate soon, but he doesn't see my point that if we owe so much money £40k that and we're meant to be going on a 3 week holiday in october(his parents paying for flights), you just don't get luxuries!!!!

OP posts:

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FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 22:54

God, I'd go mental!

Can you get hold of some bits of plastic and serve them up for tea?

twinsetandpearls · 15/04/2009 22:56

I could not be with a man life this. Can you send the game back.

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 22:57

Think its due to arrive tomorrow. He will be here as not working, so very unlikely he will let me get my hands on it to send it back

OP posts:

Doha · 15/04/2009 23:02

£40 debt!!!

What for and is it in joint names.

This wanker has no respect for you or your DC's.
Tell him game goes or you go. His choice.

Then get hom off his arse and support his families like a man not a spoiled baby.

Sorry you deserve better

hatesponge · 15/04/2009 23:04

Send it back whether he likes it or not.

He's being completely irresponsible - but I'm sure you know that anyway!

I would love to go and spend £100's on clothes and shoes. However I have bills to pay. Hence I shop in Primark

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 23:16

I told him I posted on here. And that others think he's wrong to buy the game.

Now he's started ranting that i'm a bad mother. That I'm negligent. Yes the baby did get his hands on the dettol last week, coz i took my eye off him and we can't afford locks for cupboards.

He told me if i don't like it, to back my bags. Joint mortgage.

OP posts:

FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 23:18

Tell him that if he hadn't have spent £130 ona bloody game you could feed the baby milk instead of dettol!

What a tosser!

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 23:20

LOl! he's still going on about my negligence, ignoring the money issue!!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 23:22

But seriously. I'm realy upset that he can't and won't see that its wrong. if he doesnt get a job soon we're going to lose everything anyway

OP posts:

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion · 15/04/2009 23:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 23:22

There's 2 of you there dear. Why couldn't he get off his behind and fit some locks?

abbierhodes · 15/04/2009 23:24

Put the Wii on ebay.

FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 23:25

or put the DH/DP on ebay and keep the Wii. You may get more money for the Wii though.

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 23:26

He twisted my arm into buying the wii last august on my credit card when we couldn't afford it. He has this habit of going on and on until i agree. Because i can't take the fighting.

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abbierhodes · 15/04/2009 23:30

TBH, he sounds like a twat. I wouldn't have a relationship with someone who prioritises a game over decent food for their family.

FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 23:33

Sorry, I agree with abbie. He's a tosser who puts himself before feeding his family. You and your children deserve so much better. He sounds like a child rather then a partner. I'm not surprised you are stressed out.

MrsParker · 15/04/2009 23:37

I agree with you too! Its just him that can't see it. I explained why we can't afford it, I exlained that if he had regular work it may be different.

Now he's just changing the subject, trying to get at me, which is not the first time. When he's in the wrong he likes to try and move subjects to take the heat off of him!

OP posts:

FluffyBunnyGoneBad · 15/04/2009 23:39

God, what are you doing with this kid? Sorry but he's not exactly being a partner to you is he?

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 16/04/2009 00:27

He sounds like a total numpty - I couldn't be with a man like that.
I have no idea what to suggest - I'm guessing you can't kick him out?

macdoodle · 16/04/2009 08:23

Hmm thats fairly typical, ignoring the issue and twisting it around to what you have done wrong and your faults !!
Are you happy with this man??

MrsParker · 16/04/2009 09:24

Ended up having a massive row. Him saying all this over a game! He just can't admit hes wrong, everything is about him.

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LIZS · 16/04/2009 09:34

If you can afford wii games you can afford cupboard locks - sorry, poor excuse on bith your parts. Sounds like he is burying his head in the sand and needs some debt advice from CAB or National Debtline so eh uses the rebate wisely. Stop allowing him ot wist your arm - it is like giving him permission to get into further debt.

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slug · 16/04/2009 09:49

Wait till he's asleep, find all the credit cards, including the new one, and cut them up.

FAQinglovely · 16/04/2009 09:57

£130 for Guitar Hero???? Ermm think he's stringing you some lies if he's told you it's cost that much and has spent that much money..........

CarGirl · 16/04/2009 10:01

Personally I'd open up my own bank account transfer child benefit & CTC into it, come to a credit agreement for the loans that have your name on them and leave him to sink with the rest.

CAP is a charity to go for free debt help www.capuk.org/help/needhelp.php

Flip

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