Married to a head case?

[mrsout]

We have been together for 7 years, married for 2, have two children under 6. My husband has a scar on his chest. When we first got together and I asked him about it, he said he had done it at work years ago. He is a sheet metal worker so it made sence. Never thought any more about it. Last night, during a row with his ex about custody of their child (a whole different story) she screamed "I bet she doesnt even know how you got that scar". She then went on to tell me that he had stabbed himself from stopping an ex girlfriend from leaving him. HE STABBED HIMSELF? Ok, this was over 20 years ago, but wtf? He is embarrassed, said he was young and stupid. But he never told me. Should I just forget this?

[2cats2many]

Has he ever done anything similar, or done anything to worry you about his state of mind while he's been with you? If not, I'd say forget it. It was over 20 years ago after all.....

[stressedsanta]

thats worrying,talk it through with him then maybe you will understand why he did it

[beanieb]

has any of his behaviour while with you made you think 'headcase' or is this the first time you have thought it?

I would suggest that Headcase might not be an appropriate word if this is a mental health related issue.

[notflorencenightingale]

It must have been a shock to hear this after so long together but it does not mean he ais a 'headcase^ lol!!. People do a lot of things when they are young and emotionally immature, or perhaps 20 years ago he was mentally ill but unless anything of a similar nature has happened since i suspect whatever issues he had have long since worked themselves out.

People do all sorts to cope with distessing thoughts and feelings and unfortunately self harm is not that uncommen, for some people its a one of but for others its a long term 'coping' mechanism. Doesn't sound like thats the case hear.

its probably worth having a conversation with your DH if only to find out why he has never shared this aspect of his past with you, although to be honest perhaps he never felt the need to as it doesn't seem to be an ongoing 'problem'. Maybe he was scared you would jump to the conclusion that he was a 'headcase'?