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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Should I tell him now and get it over with?

12 replies

MrsSnape · 11/10/2008 22:23

I have been speaking to a bloke online for about a week. We get on really well, have loads in common and our messages to each other are starting to read like novels, they're so long.

I really like the sound of him and kept wondering what he'd think about this kids but then I'd think "well he must be ok with it, as its on my profile that I have kids"

Anyway, after reading another long, lovely email off him, I read my profile and realised that it doesn't say anything on it about me having kids, so he doesn't know

So do I just tell him now and get it out of the way? if he doesn't like it then at least we won't be wasting anymore of each other's time or do I leave it until we've 'talked' a bit more so that he gets to know ME before realising I have kids too?

OP posts:

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MrsSnape · 11/10/2008 22:24

my kids, not 'this' kids

OP posts:

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BecauseImAWitch · 11/10/2008 22:24

Better to know how the land lies, IMO. I would tell him now.

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BoysAreLikeZombies · 11/10/2008 22:24

Tell him.

It's the Right Thing to do.

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lou33 · 11/10/2008 22:25

yes i would say something, drop it into conversation about what you have been doing this weekend, but you have to tell him

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WinkyWinkola · 11/10/2008 22:25

Definitely tell him about your children. Definitely.

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CharCharBaGOOOOOOORE · 11/10/2008 22:26

Would definitely mention it now, just casually in conversation. Otherwise it might look like you're hiding it from him.

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mitfordsisters · 11/10/2008 22:28

Tell him without further ado

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lou33 · 11/10/2008 23:23

have you not mentioned them in conversation up until now at all?
maybe you have without realising it, and it's just not abig deal to him?

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expatinscotland · 11/10/2008 23:24

tell him.

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lou33 · 11/10/2008 23:40

i cant remember actively ever having to say i have kids, it's just part of my conversation right from the off.

are you sure you havent mentioned your kids in passing?

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mumoverseas · 12/10/2008 05:53

mention them sooner rather than later. Hopefully he won't be put off. My DH wasn't. I met him online, I had 2 kids, he had none and we have now been married 3 years, have a beautiful DD aged 2 and another on the way! Not all men are scared off by kids, and if he is, he is not the one! Good luck

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MrsSnape · 12/10/2008 21:23

Ah well, I mentioned it in my last email and I've not heard from him since.

What will be, will be I suppose