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Relationships

I'm not giving too many salacious details and am not trolling but...

30 replies

Traceless · 11/10/2008 12:52

I just had one of the best, erm, nights of my life with someone I don't like a great amount.

I certainly don't love him and don't see myself ever loving him.

We aren't in a relationship and neither of us want one.

And like I said, despite the fact that his (seemingly very effective!) idea of foreplay is to make me a cup of tea and put a dvd of Family Guy on, despite the fact I don't like him very much and frequenty find myself thing "You are a wanker sometimes!", it really was shockingly good. It was a nice surprise.

Has this ever happened to anyone else or am I just weird?

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S1ur · 11/10/2008 13:03

Yes, sex doesn't need to be about love or indeed even like. Though obviously some amazing sex can be had when you are deeply into someone

Its very 'nice' when you are compatible. I don't think you're weird for enjoying sex. Even with a wanker.

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bubblagirl · 11/10/2008 13:04

lol no its a case of how much you needed it sometimes rather than who it was with lol

before dp i went with someone who really wasnt my type made me laugh though attitude stank slightly but was very good didnt do it again but i must have needed it lol

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NotDoingTheHousework · 11/10/2008 13:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

HRHSaintMamazon · 11/10/2008 13:10

sex is sex, a fuck is better and making love is something that only happens in mills and Boon.

glad you enjoyed yourself

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Snaf · 11/10/2008 13:10

@ 'hate fucks'

Am surprised you think this is so controversial, tbh. Sexual and emotional compatibility are two separate things (although obviously when they come together [no pun intended] it's fabulous). You can have fantastic sex with people you dislike.

IME, it's when you have no feelings of any sort for someone that the sex is almost bound to be awful.

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 13:14

I don't hate him, as such ... he is a friend. But he's not a very close friend and I was absolutely shocked to the bones when I realised (after a drunken snog a few weeks ago) that his , er, approach is one I respond to... very strongly

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DivaSkyChick · 11/10/2008 15:32

I once had an amazing night with a gorgeous guy I'd had a crush on for years, as he was on a TV show we all watched in the 90s. The sex was amazing.

The following day he sat me down and talked AT me for two hours about scientology and I would have jumped out of a window to escape and never see him again. Thank god the phone rang and I was able to run for the door.

But the sex really was worth it.

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solidgoldskullonastick · 11/10/2008 15:37

Nothing wrong with good sex with dickheads (some of the most intense sex I have ever had has been with idiots or freaks). As long as you draw the line at violent arseholes or people whose personal hygiene is poor enough to pose a health hazard: go ahead and enjoy.

DSC: come on then, confess!!! Was it David Duchovny?

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SmugColditz · 11/10/2008 17:41

Do you think it was because you didn't like him,, rather than despite this?

Maybe he didn't fail to meet your expectations (because you had none) and therefore it's all a bit of a bonus.

Maybe he's just good at it?!

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SmugColditz · 11/10/2008 17:43

Ps I am v !

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 20:26

he's certainly very very god at it, and it surprised me because he's not a very sensitive bloke. He's very confident about what he's doing, I suppose, and after babying a series of mummy's boys through their first forays into a sex life, it's a real change of pace to be told how it's going to go, rather than asked.

I think it's because I didn't have to look after him, rather than because I don't like him. I don't dislike him - I just didn't see him as likeable in that way until now!

He was very firmly in charge but not a bully abou it and I have to stop now cause I'm making myself

It was honestly the first time anyone has kept my interest for 4 hours though

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Rubyrubyruby · 11/10/2008 20:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

spicemonster · 11/10/2008 20:35

Have totally been there. I've had some of my best sex with men I've had to apologise for when we were outside the bedroom. No long term potential but there's nothing odd about it

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 20:41

SM you have hit the nail on the head, he is a drinking, fighting, indiscrete, baseball capped blokey bloke, I couldn't imagine going anywhere with him (not that he is anything to be ashamed of but his behavior sometimes is) but he kissed me a few weeks ago on my birthday and I was drunk so I let him, and I swear I went week at the knees! (And I have kissed other men, it's not like it was the first time I have been kissed in 5 years or anything!)

I have always had a fairly set idea about what I find attractive and I feel like my hormones have ganged up on me a bit...

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 21:30

Bump because I need more validation, more.

Or at ;east for someone to tell me what a two bit ho I am

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spicemonster · 11/10/2008 21:42

Hmm was about to post again to say how excited I am about the fact that I will be staying in a hotel with an extremely unsuitable man tomorrow evening but thought that would be stealing your thunder

He's a colleague so wouldn't want anything to come of it anyway but there's just something about him ...

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 21:45

ohhhhh how unsuitable? Does he tell horrible jokes and try to grab your tits?

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CherryChapstick · 11/10/2008 21:48

Did you post about this a few weeks ago? With a reference to having a tongue like kermit the frog?

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 22:08

erm maybe I did

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ranting · 11/10/2008 22:30

Nothing unusual about it at all, ime, love and a good shag aren't the same thing at all.

I once had a long running sexual relationship with a man who was a gold plated spanner and quite frankly I wouldn't cross the road to piss on him, should I espy him across the street on fire.

A word from the wise though, shagging on the stairs seems like a great idea at the time but indulge too often and your knees won't thank you for it in 15 years time

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Traceless · 11/10/2008 22:35

And he did have a tongue like kermit the frog

noted. No stair shagging.

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CherryChapstick · 11/10/2008 22:38

Jolly good, glad it was worthwhile.

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Klaw · 11/10/2008 22:43

Traceless, yu're a two bit ho

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SmugColditz · 12/10/2008 08:54

Oh lol that was you, was it? Well just make sure that, as you already know he's a wanker, you don't fall for him, cos you loving him won't turn him into a nicer person, he'll still be a wanker but he'll be one with a hold over you.

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nkf · 12/10/2008 08:57

It might be that because you don't like him much, you were very relaxed and not trying to impress.

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