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ohmigod he's left me

9 replies

Monty100 · 23/06/2008 00:52

the man that has helped me raise my children has left because their father has moved in 5 doorsd away from me. ds keeps running down there to see his dad (he's 12). dp gone saying let yr dad do it all then. help

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KerryMum · 23/06/2008 01:05

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girlnextdoor · 23/06/2008 07:26

HOW old is this man? You are better off without him- don't know how long you have been together etc etc,but seems very immature behaviour- maybe he was unhappy anyway and this is an excuse to get out? sorry

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littlewoman · 23/06/2008 09:37

This really isn't fair. Full credit to him for raising your son, but your ds is only human - of course he wants to see his dad. Hope he pulls himself together and comes back.

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OverMyDeadBody · 23/06/2008 09:42

Sounds like a very immature reaction tbh. Hopefully all he needs is a little time to accept this new situation and then he'll be back.

Are there any other problems in the relationship that could have sparked this kind of a reaction?

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Monty100 · 23/06/2008 16:18

Yes,thanks, all of you have said the things I've been thinking. He's been in our lives for 10 years fgs! We have spoken today and he has calmed down. Hopefully we can work it through. I have told him however that this behaviour is quite unacceptable and he says he'll have to live with it. We'll see. Many thanks.

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Miggsie · 23/06/2008 16:23

I can sort of see why he is hurt, he has been raising someone else's kid for a long time while the real dad did what????
Then the real dad turns up, somewhat provocatively and lives down the street and the kid wants to see dad.
I can see why he is cheesed off.
But also I think he dealt with it badly...probably what the actual father wanted?

My neice's real dad buggered off when she was 4, reappeared when she was 20 something, played the loving dad (this pissed her mother off mightlily), got the neice a house etc etc. Caused all sorts of ructions in the family (due to the dad being a right sod).

Does your partner have issues with the real dad that he has not articulated?

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forevercleaning · 23/06/2008 16:25

He will be back. I think it is just a stupid reaction, and he will see sense shortly.

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justageek · 23/06/2008 16:26

good god give the guy a break yes he is behaving immaturely but he is probably feeling very vunerable and hurting and not thinking rationally. Give him time to cool down, and dont be horrible to him, think how you might feel if the shoe was on the other foot.

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Monty100 · 23/06/2008 16:48

justageek - absolutely - don't know if I'd be as admirable as he has been over the years. DP does have issues with the dad - basically the dad can be a real t*at!! Sorry.