Long and complicated Im afraid but I could really do with some sane advice.<br /> I have two dc
s eldest dd is 8yo and ds 6months. My sister has 3 dcs all older then mine, she lives near my mum I live about 4hrs away.<br /> Dd was a difficult chid, had allergies was very clingy and poor sleeper... described by my mum (to a close friend)as a
difficult baby, who doesnt like me. She has never made any attempt to form a relationship with dd, she rarely visits and when she does visit she doesnt play with dd (or interact) at all.<br /> <br /> When she visits she is always very
difficult, she never helps, sits around all day reading her book, fusses about the food I cook (not what she likes, served too late,too hot, too cold!!),trys to stop dd
s normal sfter school activities because she does too much
etc. When we visit her (or my sister) all I hear about is how much help she is, how great she is with the kids,how my sister couldnt manage without her blah blah...(so I know she can do it)
Things have come to a head after the birth of ds. She came to help
but whenever I asked her to do something.. nothing unreasonable - make a cup of tea, peel some spuds, she came up with a reason why she couldnt and she ended up with the lo and I ended up doing the job. Final straw came when I asked her to play with dd, as she was feeling a little left out. I was upstairs feeding and after no more then 10 mins dd comes up in tears cos gran had shouted at her, I finished feeding and went to find out what had happened. This must have been a good half hour later and she had made no attempt to find dd, I was told that dd wasnt playing
fairlyand she wasnt going to play with her - ffs shes 8.5 new bro etc etc, Mum couldnt see why I was cross with her. Turns out dd had wanted to colour Cinderellas dress green!!!<br /> <br /> Anyhow now dd refers to her as
grumpy gran, refuses to speak to her on the phone, talk about her etc.<br /> <br /> DH says we are best of without her - I
ve never been close to her and wouldnt miss her from my life.
Sister refuses to get involved
I dont want my dcs to miss out on a relationship with their gran but I dont want to force dd to see her/ talk to her, and I really dont know how to approach it without sounding like a brat
cos she does for my sister and not for me.
Sorry so long and boring but what do I do?
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Advice needed please...
15 replies
stuckinthecorner · 22/06/2008 23:47
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