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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

please help

5 replies

katjac · 12/08/2007 16:11

My partner has a new job, miles away and wants us all to move there. I really dont want to move, and really dont love him anymore. This a year ago wouldnt have been a problem, as i just wouldnt have gone with him, but i now have a 6 month old son.

My friends and family are all close by now. His are not and never have been. They are all up north.
I have told him i am unhappy and dont want to go. When i did, he became angry and violent and i had to call the police.

He seems to be blocking out how i am feeling, and keeps going on about our new life there, and how lovely it will be. The more time goes on, the more unhappy i am becoming. I am too scared to tell him again that i dont want to go, as i am scared of his reaction, especially after last time.

What should i do?

OP posts:
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AnAngelWithin · 12/08/2007 16:12

in a nutshell, he should go and you should stay. there doesn't sound as though there is much point in you both being together.

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missyhols · 12/08/2007 16:12

if you dont love him i think you know the answer deep down yourself. maybe make that horrible step to breaking up?

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whomovedmychocolate · 12/08/2007 16:14

He was violent towards you - do you want to risk that happening again? It sounds like you have already decided that things end now. Ask your family to help and go, for the sake of your son if nothing else.

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peanutbear · 12/08/2007 16:15

don't go from personal experience its really ahrd to move away from all friends and relatives

I think if the relationhip is strong it will work but if it isnt the resentment just builds and builds

DH and are still together but its caused a lot of rows and upset when me staying at home would have been better for me and the children

P.s If he got violent once he will do it again I know i sounds nasty to say but no matter how sorry they are the first time, you spend all your ime trying not to set off that spark again

sorry my post is so negative wish you all the best

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madmumof5 · 12/08/2007 16:15

it sounds like he just wants to get you away from your family and friends do what your instinct tells you stay were you are happy

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