Talk

Flip

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Untitled

10 replies

Sharon1976 · 16/07/2007 00:39

I am new to mumsnet and my aunt told me to come here I have bin having a rellationship with my boss and i am pregnent. he is not happy about it an wont tel his wief. I wil tel his wife cosw she needs to no. he sayz thit i wil not sufer but i am wurrying abut this all the tim wat shuld i do

OP posts:

Report

newlifenewname · 16/07/2007 00:43

Whether you are genuine or not, let me say this. It isn't your duty or job to tell his wife. You had the option of protecting her earlier and you chose not to.

Don't use this opportunity as manipulation now.

Report

hurtwife · 16/07/2007 07:55

I would say look into your heart to find the answer but it seems you have made a huge mistake so may not get the advice you need. The trouble is get yourself involved in other peoples lives and i am sorry but you have to take all the crap they are going to throw at you.

Report

moopymoo · 16/07/2007 08:13

(if this is real) i do not think that it is your place to tell his wife. you achieve nothing by this other than looking manipulative. it is for him to tell or not tell. If this has been his response, 99% sure he will never leave her, you need to get your head round having this baby by yourself, if that is what you want to do. goodluck

Report

mytwopenceworth · 16/07/2007 08:21

On the assumption that this is real, I would say that the easiest thing in the world is for people to say you should not have done what you did and you deserve what you get.

That may or may not be true. But the situation is as it is and now you are pregnant. You can't turn back the clock and make a different choice, all you can do is learn from your mistake and move forward.

Your boss has basically used you as a blow up doll. You can't change that, but you can get a bit of self respect. Are you keeping the baby? If so, you owe it a decent life.

He won't tell his wife. This is not unusual. Most married men who seek sex elsewhere do not want the scratching of this itch to impact on their real life.

His wife has done nothing to you. She is his victim and to a lesser extent, she is your victim too. Should you tell her? No. He should. Will he? Not until or inless the CSA comes after him. At this point he will inevitably insist he is not the father, tests will follow, it will be messy.

Anything that happens to his marriage he (and probably his wife too) will blame you for, so be prepared for them to turn on you.

Unless she throws him out, at which point he will 'choose' you and arrive on your doorstep with his shredded clothes in a bin liner, telling you how much he cares.

Your job now is to put the baby first and to assume that you will get nothing from him but grief.

Good luck. You will need it.

Report

macdoodle · 16/07/2007 16:07

umm contraception stupid bint??

Report

slinkyjo · 16/07/2007 16:10

lol you made your bed lie in it, im sorry you DO NOT sleep with another womans man you deserve everything you get

Report

elesbells · 16/07/2007 16:14

me thinks

Report

Anniegetyourgun · 16/07/2007 17:35

Not that sort of troll, it's too cute. And I bet its spelling is better.

I don't approve of abortion but there are some people who just should not breed.