dh has changed?

[cabbagedinner]

Married for 6,together 14. Haven't had sex in 3 weeks. Dh works nights so it's only the weekends we are intimate anyways. Always have sex even if I'm tired which I usually am, 3dc under 5 have me run riot.
First weekend, I had aunt flo but he usually tries it on anyways and we end up doing other emm intimate things but this weekend he didn't even try. I wasn't too bothered. Until weekend 2 came round and he didn't want it at all, saying he was tired...the whole weekend?! He never ever is too tired for it.
Third weekend he conveniently was ill for the whole weekend complaining he ate something even though we all ate the same.
Now maybe I'm looking into it too much. I really hope I am. Maybe it's all a coincidence.
This Monday he announced he's going to try to eat more healthy... This isn't unusual for him ,he does this every now and then, no more than myself.
I know it's wrong but I've checked his phone,nothing out if the ordinary.
If I read this post I'd think oh yes definitely ow. But don't see anything else other than diet and no sex. Am I looking into it too much?

[Oakmaiden]

Maybe, just maybe, he has been feeling more tired and run down than normal? Rather than something sinister? Is he having a rough time at work?

Although I do always like to assume the best, unless there is real evidence to the contrary.

[MrsCaptainReynolds]

Could he be experiencing some erectile dysfunction? Any new medications e.g antidepressants? Has he gained weight? I guess OW could be a possibility but the comment about his health might suggest he's concerned about performance issues.

[ErmagerdANerknerm]

How is he with you otherwise? Is he going out more? Secretive with phone/computer usage? Mentioning anybody new? I wouldn't cry affair just because he's having a dry patch and wants to eat healthily.

[Flexibilityisquay]

I think you need to ask him whats going on.

[cabbagedinner]

Not more stressed than usual oakmaiden
Hoping it is just that.

[Iamblossom]

I think you are jumping to huge conclusions just because he hasn't felt horny for less than a month. Dh and I can go for a few weeks without doing the deed and I wouldn't think anything of it. Could be anyone of 10 reasons.

Chill. Look after yourself and him, be kind to each other. He'll soon be up for it again.

[cabbagedinner]

Sorry xposted. He was in a bad mood for about 2 weeks just saying he was tired whenever I asked him. This Monday he was in a much better frame of mind.

[cabbagedinner]

I know I am jumping to conclusions but it's just so out of character for him.

[Oakmaiden]

So if he is acting out of character, then there is SOMETHING wrong, but not necessarily an OW situation. Try talking to him about how he is feeling, what is on his mind? There could be so many reasons.

[Branleuse]

id dig deeper if i were you

[cabbagedinner]

I'll chat to him again tomorrow,see if he says what's up but I know he won't he'll brush it off as tiredness.

[cabbagedinner]

Hello all again,well I mentioned it to him this afternoon that we hadn't had sex in 3 weeks and it will be 4 this weekend. I said it nicely sort of jokey. He looked uncomfortable and laughed it off saying sure you're always asleep when I get home , I said to him how it's only weekends we do the Deed anyways. He tried to make out it was my fault, that I'm always tired or its my period and that I never initiate it.. This is true, I maybe initiate sex 20 or 30% of the time but only because I've never had too! I said I tried the last few weekends and nothing and he said well come on now so And grined,thinking I'd say no but I said yes and ran up to the bedroom. We did the deed a very quick one as he was leaving for work and the dc were downstairs watching tv
But I am none the wiser to what's going on., maybe nothing ever was. This is what I'm hoping.

[Frogisatwat]

My innards have sadly never let me down

[cabbagedinner]

Ok, jokey was the wrong word. I said it nicely. I didn't want it to turn into an argument and I didn't want him to think I was nagging him.

[Oakmaiden]

But you did make it about the lack of sex, and not about whether anything was worrying him....

Ah well. Your life, I suppose.

[Frogisatwat]

Err ok oak and chase
Even I understood what op meant
I didn't think for one minute she dressed up in a clown outfit and honked his nose. No need for that

[Oakmaiden]

Well, no FDrog, actually. I didn't think that at all. But she didn't ask "is everything ok,?" she said "How come we haven'#t had sex in 3 weeks". Which certainly would make me feel defensive, even if there was no reason to be, and certainly wouldn't make me inclined to share any woes I was currently concealing.

It also makes it SEEM like the lack of sex is more important to her than the fact he might be worried about something/have some sort of problem.

But, as I say, I guess it is her life. She has to approach things in the way she thinks best.

[cabbagedinner]

Thanks frogis
Oops didn't write word for word our conversation my apologies. But yes I did ask him was he worried about anything or was there anything bothering him. Did he want to talk about anything? He asked why and I said because we hadn't had sex in 3 weeks.
Sorry if this was the wrong approach but sex is the only thing different, apart from his new diet.