Hugging is ok. Quite nice actually, although it makes me feel sad because I know that's all I want. When he kisses me I want to pull away. We've barely had sex in the last 3-4 years. He instigates and I put him off, feigning tiredness, illness, or just plain 'no thanks, not in the mood'. Sometimes I agree, because I feel I 'should', and I try to get in to it, really I do, but again, it makes me sad. It makes me sad that I no longer feel the way I used to about him and I don't know why. I've cried afterwards the last couple of times. I like spending time with him - we enjoy time together, going out with the kids, watching tv, going out for occasional meals. But intimacy? I can't. And I don't know why.
He's a good man. He's never done anything wrong, he's never treated me badly. He's a great father. Why do I feel like this, and how can I go on feeling like this. Or rather, how can I change feeling like this? Or is it a lost cause. Should I cut and run? I know that if I did that he would be destroyed. He knows things aren't great (obviously) but I think he also thinks that we're ticking along alright. He adores me, and he adores our children. He doesn't know my feelings regarding intimacy with him. Maybe I should leave him to find a future with someone who can be the wife he deserves to have.
I don't know what I hope to achieve from posting here, but I don't really know what else to do.
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Relationships
Feel sad and reluctant at the idea of any intimacy with my husband :-(
NotInThePlan · 31/08/2014 19:12
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