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Relationships

Advice needed

6 replies

ashamedgay84 · 30/07/2014 19:12

You may remember me, the guy who had an affair for nearly 2 years with a guy who had a gf and she found out twice. Well you know I ended it all, told her everything and walked away. A lot of crap from her since then but quiet for a a month until last week where I had a email from her asking me to not contact them again or we will have to meet up??

I have not contacted any of them since I told her everything, she set up a fake profile on many gay websites, slagging me off and probably to look for me or him, and she got banned from a few of them. My question is do I have any right in emailing back asking her to stop contacting me when I have not done any wrong doing since it all kicked off and yes I done wrong and she clearly blames me for his wrong doings but she took him back surely she cannot point the finger at me when he's up to no good??

Thanks

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Granville72 · 30/07/2014 19:22

Ignore her, block her email address, mobile number etc. She will soon get bored and leave you alone. Or even change your email address and phone numbers.

Yes you did wrong, but it takes two to tango and I'm guessing you didn't force her guy to have a relationship with you. She is harassing you and stalking you, you can get an injunction against her if you feel that necessary and have the relevant proof.

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ashamedgay84 · 30/07/2014 19:30

Sad thing though is when I said that if she continues to stalk me and harrass me back in February I'd go to the police or worse out him, but that doesn't seem to stop her.

I kinda feel like she's wanting me to respond to give her something to latch onto and make me be the bad guy again but then I also feel that if I say nothing she may turn up or just find other ways, maybe to find out if he is still with me. Either way is crap afterall I lied to her for a long time to protect him so why would she believe me either way

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ballsballsballs · 30/07/2014 19:53

I remember you and I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. You don't deserve to be punished for all eternity for having an affair with her husband, FFS.

Don't email her back - she's looking for a reaction (any reaction) and will, as you say, latch onto it.

I would strongly suggest going to the police; it's not fair that you are being cyber-stalked.

Take care Flowers

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BitOutOfPractice · 30/07/2014 20:01

The best answer is no answer. Don't feed her obsession with you. She's clearly struggling to get over this (and who wouldn't?!) but you getting in touch will not help her at all.

Block, Delete. Ignore

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Quitelikely · 30/07/2014 20:24

Block. Delete. Ignore.

Do not respond at all. It will serve no purpose. She is hurting and directing her anger towards you. She obviously isn't over the pain of the affair (which is understandable) but you just need to keep away and march on with your life.

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ashamedgay84 · 31/07/2014 18:08

Thanks everyone, that seems to be the general consensus amongst my female friend's aswell. I can't allow myself to get sucked back into that drama again it's nothing to do with me, I've moved on.

Thank you

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