I'm torn between what I think I want to do, and what the rest of my family want me to do.
I've been married for 13 years and have two DDs, 9 and 5.
I don't love my DH anymore. We've never been very affectionate and live separate lives in the same house. We have separate bank accounts and never spend time together.
DH is financially much better off than me and is careful with his money. We have a central account for direct debits and we pay the same amount in each month.
We have drifted apart and I always thought I could never have the confidence to go it alone. I've lost a lot of weight and am getting fed up of not feeling loved or appreciated. He collects the kids from his mums and comes home with them and cooks the tea for when I come in from work. We don't argue but don't have any affection or time for each other.
I've tried to reignite things as have tried hugging him and having sex.... Thinking the more I do this, the more I will love him, but just end up feeling empty. I feel so sad at how things have turned out.
My parents think I should put up with my lot and stay married. I'm scared of the financial consequences and the effect a separation will have on the DDs, but I feel like I can't live forever like this. I feel lonely but selfish for wanting out. I've told him about a month ago that I want a divorce and he was hysterical and told our eldest DD, and she was hysterical too. I keep thinking I only have one life.... And im crying as I type this as I feel so desperate.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
What should I do??
Ships699 · 13/11/2013 19:39
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