Basically we've had a bad few weeks. Two big arguments, lots of tension, lots of sadness at the thought that maybe we're just not working out but we had a big heart to heart two days ago and I thought we were going to be ok. Basically I just wanted him to show me that he loves me. That's it.
Because the point is, I just don't see it. For a start, he never seems enthusiastic about anything that involves me unless it's something HE really wants to do. Example being a street festival thing we'd planned to go to for ages a few weeks back. I was all excited about going, had got all dressed up for it and in the end he said he couldn't be arsed and told me to go on my own. The following week he'd promised to take me to cinema on the wednesday night - Tuesday night comes and he says "oh I've been invited to cinema this week with the lads ... " I say "what night?" and he says "wednesday". I say "but WE'RE going wednesday?" and he replies "I'll take you another night, I promise." (see where I stand in his list of priotities here?).
Past two weekends a couple of music festivals have been running in town. He REALLY wanted to go so insisted we go to the first one. I didn't want to but I made the effort and went for his sake. He got drunk and upset me, giving me the silent treatment etc so that was awful. Following weekend another music festival was on - I really didn't want to go because of the previous weekend but he insisted so I went for his sake. Again he got drunk and was a complete bastard to me, really, really upset me and we didn't speak for the rest of the weekend.
Anyway this week has been shit, I've been so stressed out. But he'd promised to take me out tonight to celebrate a recent achievement so I've been really looking forward to it. Today, he comes home from work all sniffly saying he feels ill. He also left the bank page open on the PC subtly showing me how much into the overdraft we are. He carries on moaning and whining and in the end I say "just say if you don't want to go out" and he makes a noise which suggests he really doesn't want to. He says he feels like shit and is worried about money. Ok. Disapointed but if we really are skint - fair enough. He then tells me he'll feel ok to go to football match tomorrow day time and ... "oh btw I've been invited out to a works night out next weekend - I've tried to get out of it but you know how it is."
No I don't know how it is because I'm not the one that went to Leeds on an all night bender or went to cinema with mates last week or went to a 3 day break last month etc etc I'm the mug that says "no, we can't afford it" or "no, I have something planned with DP."
So anyway, truely and utterly fed up and pissed off I've just arranged to go out with a mate tonight instead. Now he's upset saying he was still wanting to go out, he was just giving his tablets time to kick in. Am I in the wrong here?? the pessimist in me is saying he's begrudginly wanting to go out with me so he can go out with friends next weekend without the hassle.
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Always at the bottom of his priorities. Feeling done in.
15 replies
FeelingBroken81 · 13/09/2013 18:21
OP posts:
hesterton ·
13/09/2013 21:58
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