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Relationships

The Pyscopath is starting again?

148 replies

CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 01:19

If anyone knows me please dont out me. To frightened to use old MN name.

It has been a wonderful few months or should I say nearly a year of peace. No trouble at all since 2012.

I had made plans with help info from here. My main goal to move to be free from any more threats to my and dc life.

Told by mortgage advisor I do not earn enough. They asked did I get maintanence as this counted as wages!

As I dont I thought I would apply as ex doesnt live in UK. I was 100% sure CSA would just say ex moved abroad and close case. I have not heard back from CSA mind you so this could be the outcome. This was 2 weeks ago.

Anyway my senses have gone in overdrive last few days and cant sleep. I decided to check ex blog and low and behold! The title refers to me. His NN for me since we split. The most freaky thing was ( so not even the demonic voice put on) was a weird american sounding childs voice (possible digital enhanced?) of child referring to ex using the nickname I had for ex when we were together (many many years ago).

ex names a night of an attack, but it refers to via FB?

Now thing is if I go to the police they will lock ME up thinking I am nuts!

Welcome to Gas Lighting Infurno


Any tips/slaps/hugs welcome as my PTSD has returned 10 fold! But hoping the hypervigilence will keep me awake\alive

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CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 02:12

OMG!

I googled the distorted voice and it was taken from a piece of music about...and I quote

"The song's subject matter refers to a man who descends into madness, taking out his anger on his family. At the end of the song, it is hinted his sanity snaps and he murders them."

Is ex just trying to frighten me or is the psycho planning to murder us AGAIN!

He refers to Saturday night:( This Saturday night? Next week? Next year?

I feel sick! I can't go to police with this...even I think it is total bonkers.

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NoToast · 20/08/2013 07:46

This sounds really freaky. You must be so frightened. I think that you definitely should log this with the police on their non-emergency line or by email. Outline the background so that they know what's been going on.

I have been in a similarish situation- just to know that the person is thinking of you is terrifying. You are better placed than anyone to judge the level of threat he poses. Please take advice to keep yourself safe.

Take some deep breaths too and look after yourself, you need your strength. Sending you positive vibes.

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NoToast · 20/08/2013 07:50

FWIW, if he doesn't live in the UK, the CSA contact may just have stirred him up and he's trying to maintain some level of power and control. He may also be able to see IPs of people visiting his blog and if he knows you're going to visit he wants to scare you.

It's the level of effort put into being frightening that's just so twisted....

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waltzingmathilda · 20/08/2013 07:52

I decided to check ex blog and low and behold!

Why would you do that? you are just as bad, on line stalking him.

Stop giving him head space. People can only get reactions if you give it to them.

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Lweji · 20/08/2013 07:53

Hi

I think I may know who you were.

It really may be healthier for you not yo check these things. He probably knows you check up on him and know about his blog, so he uses it to frighten you.
Stay vigilant but please don't overthink it. Try to distract yourself.

If you get really worried, do contact the police, but prepare what you are going to say first.

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TheOneAndOnlyFell · 20/08/2013 08:08

ex names a night of an attack, but it refers to via FB?

I don't understand this. Confused


I have no idea who you are, but without wishing to sound unsupportive you are sounding a little paranoid over this. Understandable maybe, but from what you've said about this song, I can see no obvious problems or signs in it, and it all sounds a little tenuous. If he had written that comment about the songs content on his blog then I'd agree that would be designed to send a message to you, although the aim would probably be to maintain an element of control over you through fear and cryptic threats, (especially as he is not in the UK) rather than a literal intention to murder you all. And that control can only be achieved by you looking at the blog - so the answer is??!

But he didn't even write that did he - you had to google the lyrics of the song to accidentally stumble across the message. Confused If he's doing it deliberately to terrify you then he has a very subtle way of going about it.


What do you mean by 'he refers to Saturday' ?

What exactly does he say about Saturday? In what context?

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Smerlin · 20/08/2013 08:24

When was the blog post written- recently or could it have been a while ago?

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ScrambledSmegs · 20/08/2013 09:51

I think it would be best if you never checked his blog again. It's only going to get you into a vicious circle of being scared, checking his blog, being even more scared, checking his blog again etc...

He's probably getting off on posting weird, obscure shit on that blog and imagining you looking at it and getting scared. Honestly, don't go giving him that satisfaction.

Is there anyone you can talk to in RL about this? Rise above the creepy, stick to the normal?

Oh yeah, and even if he does believe in it (purposely vague) doesn't mean it's real. It's not. He's being ridiculous.

Mainline camomile tea (nice with honey) and cut down on caffeine if you drink a lot of tea/coffee, it exacerbates that jittery feeling. You may find that the paranoia abates a little. Seriously, someone I knew had pts and paranoia after an incident (vague again) and was advised to stop drinking caffeine, obviously in conjunction with the help they were getting. It did help a bit.

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ScrambledSmegs · 20/08/2013 09:56

Well that was all a bit garbled and in the wrong order. Sorry Hmm

Hope you're ok. He does sound like a nasty piece of work, from what I remember.

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TheOneAndOnlyFell · 20/08/2013 10:50

He's probably getting off on posting weird, obscure shit on that blog and imagining you looking at it and getting scared.

Exactly.

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TheOneAndOnlyFell · 20/08/2013 10:52

Well a single cup of coffee after 3pm can keep me up all hours of the night, so I imagine if I had anything worrying on my mind there would be a whole lot more hours to lay there wide awake fretting about it!

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pictish · 20/08/2013 10:54

Well I for one wouldn't feel comfortable in ignoring it.

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pictish · 20/08/2013 10:56

And I say that as soeone who is sitting here in good spirits. I would find that worrying, and would want to seek advice somewhere...like here, or the police - I don't know.

OP - my sympathies.

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LoremIpsum · 20/08/2013 10:56

I remember you, OP. If you don't feel you can contact the police, you need to get in touch with someone you feel you can turn to for support.

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TheOneAndOnlyFell · 20/08/2013 11:06

What on earth is she going to tell the police? That her ex who lives abroad has a blog and he lifted some song lyrics from somewhere, and when she googled the lyrics she stumbled across the fact that the song is about a man who killed his family? It sounds creepy, yes, but she sought out the blog - he has not contacted he, nor has he made any specific reference to wanting to kill her on the blog.

They can and will do nothing.

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ScrambledSmegs · 20/08/2013 13:23

Actually I may be wrong, but haven't you already drawn the blog to the attention of the police, OP? And because it's in the guise of 'art' or some such twattery he can pretty much do what he wants?

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CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 18:14

Thank you all for your replies. i'll try and answer but dont want ex too find me here so cant quote titles of songs to exact words incase ex defo knows I have seen this rubbish. Then ex has won one then.

NoToast thanks for your support. I cant go to police though as just trying to explain here was bad enough as it makes me sound crazy....but he is a genius in doing that!

Couple birthdays ago I checked and ex wrote piece of music on ds birthday. It was screaming mainly and frighteing and It was basically saying I was or ex was Satan and ds was son of Satan. That really upset me as to think the dad thinks that of his flesh and blood! I contacted police about that as ex only had one ds and did it on the day! Police said nought they could do unless ex actually named his ds name on it. Yes thats it Smegs...even though he has his RL name and photo on the blog.

I used to check the blog frequently esp when ex was attacking my home every few weeks back 2 yrs ago. A lot of support here
i virtually stopped except for times when ie morning after my Bday he was parked outside my house and sped off when I opened the curtain. So I check then. But had not since. The actual usage of blog putting this evil sounding music/lyrics/titles was also an indication he was not happy and back then I knew an attack was looming.

But I had a bad feeling...call it guardian angel/intuition/gut feeling etc but I felt something wrong and I had not checked for several months. So yes my fault for giving ex the head space. However very freaky that the song was put up the day before!

But as Lugie (thank you for not outing me) and others who know my history with this as been going on a decade now things have been quite I have not posted on MN as things quiet. So I have mot given ex head space and followed good advice here. I am however glad I know as it could save our lives tbh.

Ex talks about lots of people coming together on Saturday night on FB ( so if not this Saturday night it must be another one in the future but sounds like this one) to create a powerful attack with lots of bells ringing. Ex is a Wican heavily into Alester Crawley ( I had bever heard of the man until ex music titles had a lot of AC quites) which also frightened me back then. He bosts about being a High Priest too so yes I was scared. But it settled down.

Smegs no one RL to talk too as would be locked up! Feel like a priest would be the safest person as prayers to help stop the evil twunt.

He is also talking in tongue on the music after the religious music...the man is very sick! But the last bit well stupid me googles thinking what is this about? ? A plot to murder his family!

This will not be the first time he has tried to murder us hence the CCTV in my NN.

sorry sounds totally crazy please dont slate me just need hand holding until Sunday morning as I am posititve I will not sleep all night on Sat.

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MrsMcEnroe · 20/08/2013 18:41

God you poor woman.

I'll hold your hand.

I would honestly go to the police with this if he has tried to murder you before, or Women's Aid... could you do that?

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CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 19:04

Thanks Mrs McEnore cant wait for Sunday morning! Until then I do feel scared. Wish I didn't as it means ex has won.

Their are a few MNs on here that I have disclosed ex music blog too, wish they were around to try and explain this mess better than I can even! OLKN you around.

Victim Support helped me mainly and Arson Team yrs ago and some good counselling at WA last year. Police have been a joke throughout tbh! But Theone andOnly you are 100% correct although creepy ex has not broken the law as not mentioned names directly.

I guess I will be ok after Saturday. Hopefully?

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OldLadyKnowsNothing · 20/08/2013 19:43

Amazingly, I just found you... I can be around on here a lot of the time, esp. on Saturday.

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Hissy · 20/08/2013 19:47

(((squeeze)))

I think you ought to call WA again, and ask for advice. It may be that they can come to police with you.

Have there been any suspicious cars etc?

Would your mortgage co allow you to rent the property out? Then you could rent somewhere else.

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CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 20:03

HH thank you for the squeeze.

I have always listened to your advise which was always MOVE!

So back in work 6 months...went to bank (several) and asked for mortgage for to cover cheapest 1 bed in whole area! Declined! I was told if wages increased ie maintanence I could meet criteria!

I was so pee'd off as this has been my goal for years but couldnt buy when not working. Plus with the history of violence on my property I dont think I could get a tenent? They only have to stare at CCTV alone to be put off but can check police reports now too.

I cant afford to move stuck forever:( Well until either wages increase or credit score improves to lend more). I was so upset I applied to CSA knowing deep down they could not help....but I forgot! Ex still registered at parents house and GP so he doesnt have to pay for GP/medication and free hospital treatment. I remember he had gout yrs ago and came home to see GP and treatment as to expensive where ex lived.

He possibly has had letter from CSA then at parents! Planning to return home on weekend? Oh fuck!

I have not looked out for cars and tbh not here in day as been to busy trying to find a mortgage to move. Getting desperate now esp after another crazed song! Trouble is if I speak to police HH they will say it is me that is mentally unwell as ex gas lighting is Olympic level:(

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CCTVmum · 20/08/2013 20:06

OLKN...THANK YOU:)

Can you just check the blog and give me your honest opinion!

Am I being over sensitive or is it a tiny bit evil and scary!

PS that was NN for ex back then when dc on music says 'Where's ....' Eek!

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OldLadyKnowsNothing · 20/08/2013 20:19

Just listened to the new one, does sound weird but I can't make out all the words. Confused And, yes, I see why you find it threatening, and targetted, but I don't see how you could convince the police to do anything because it's not criminal. He's a clever one, eh? Angry

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TramadolDaze · 20/08/2013 20:24

I remember you. Why can't you post in your old NN? I'm afraid it's crystal clear from the get-go who you are so if he's looking for you it won't be too hard. I know in the past you've been advised repeatedly by the wise people here to stop looking at his shit online but you don't. You just keep on doing it. YOU and you alone are permitting him to get to you - if that is his intention. He just sounds like a nutjob to me but you're making him out to be the High Priest of Evil when really he's nothing of the sort and if you'd only stop googling him and reading his blog then he couldn't touch you.
Also I remember that incident when you thought it was him outside but I also remember that it was never proven was it? Could have been anyone but you're making it him and so once more allowing him into your head. The power to change all this in in YOUR hands.

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