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The Dating Thread - episode 60

(1000 Posts)
Djangounhinged Wed 31-Jul-13 17:21:11

If I may?

Snapespeare Sat 03-Aug-13 17:35:28

Yes, sorry (hello jo!) DFU has explained it perfectly. smile

DadfromUncle Sat 03-Aug-13 17:37:17

Oh and Jo thanks for asking the spud question apart from being far from convinced I'm not I like to know the criteria.
Good luck to all daters/datees tonight.

DadfromUncle Sat 03-Aug-13 17:39:04

Liking DFU - utter it under my breath at times (don't flip up) as mantra for sucess. NB will not do on date if I get one.

48howdidthathappen Sat 03-Aug-13 17:50:16

DFU I can only do average wink So its on a need to know basis.

JoAlone Sat 03-Aug-13 17:56:33

Definitely prefer DFU, although, using it to curse under ones breath, is worse than calling you Dad ....Hmmm. Ooh, actually it puts you in Deity status!!! Instead of saying 'Oh God (other Deities are available)' you could say DFU and we would all be paying homage to you!

Still lost on the Spud issue.. Is it opening a can of worms? probably best not done around the spuds.

Aww, very romantic idea, the pizza, not the worms, I'm liking the Emotional Pizza, supply chain issues aside.

Waves and returns to the fold of lurkers.... Actually off to see a film in the RW with DD, but don't think it is likely to be half as entertaining as this lot.

JoAlone Sat 03-Aug-13 18:00:56

Ooh, also waiting with bated breath to find out the next chapter on 'The Bant Saga'.

Bant don't worry too much, as the others say, she is going to be upset, the worst one I got was 'you might get fat', umm, yeah, what does one respond to that? I was upset for sure, but in a slightly different way than heartbroken. I was holding out that he 'might get a personality', but 'never-been-in-a-long-term-relationship-at-49' should really have been my red flag, so I flogged myself and jogged on grin. All POF'ers, he is one in Southampton, tall lanky guy who likes to walk a lot.

TigsytheTiger Sat 03-Aug-13 18:07:32

Snape you have to say it to Nameless now .... imagine if he did say "it" and you didn't respond, he may think it has got all awkward and you didn't reply because you don't feel the same and then he won't risk saying it again and you'll be waiting and this and that and this and that and then if and but and why and how .............please put us out of our misery and tell him grin

Winefiend Sat 03-Aug-13 18:27:02

Snape how about a cake with those 3 little words on or a cupcake each? Wee bit cliched mind.

You can tell I am hungover and on a food trip hmm Just had the best Burger King ever. Tremendous. BEEF (of a fashion).

DadfromUncle Sat 03-Aug-13 18:53:16

48 smile I walked straight into that eh?

Snapespeare Sat 03-Aug-13 18:54:29

Kids are away shortly and we'll be going camping for a couple of days. Then it's his birthday and I'm fucked if I'll combine it with his birthday. I'll think of something. I do like the medium of pizza though. I could always wait until he's asleep and write it on his arse. (Have left kisses on him in eyeliner before (not on his arse...) I'll think of something. I have to stop myself blurting it out during hormonal activity based moments ...the best one I managed to not yell was 'MARRY ME!!!' I don't even necessarily believe in marriage as an institution FFS. He just makes me want to be the best I can be. Because he's amazing. [vom]

I'll get there in the next couple of weeks.

porridgecarver Sat 03-Aug-13 18:57:48

Back from date with bike man. He was lovely, I enjoyed his company and he has already asked if I'd like to meet him again but he was very nervous and it made me realise my fatal relationship error...I fancy confident dominant men, whom I generally don't actually like after the initial attraction has rubbed off.

So although I really enjoyed being with him his body language and general nervousness meant I didn't want to rip his clothes off. There were moments when he was more relaxed and I could see the possibility of something but what to do now?

And how do i get round this hideous realisation that the men I fancy are likely to be Dominators like me ex, and the nice blokes, of the type I would like to grow old with actually don't do anything for me??!!

lurkinglorna Sat 03-Aug-13 19:05:26

porridgecarver in the same boat here. Don't want some angry "I am successful and SO important" dude but don't want some gentle hipster either.

But there ARE men in the middle I reckon? As in - ex was military but liked spending his time off either cuddling me and fixing my tea -- before 50 shading me --. Or one of my male friends is the same - he's assertive in that he's the guy who goes round to "have a word" if there's anything that needs sorting, especially where the ladies are concerned hmm, really physically tough, but also can cook and watch foreign films. I think they exist, but we have to keep looking smile

I have PMT, and I've just realised that in one of the topless photos on "viewed me" on POF I can see his PUBES confused.

Eating cake and tea. Not such a bad day really. Winefiend made me realise I want a burger.

Winefiend Sat 03-Aug-13 19:12:35

lorna it was reet nice but I am still hungry. Will I go straight to gluttonous hell if I go to the chippy in an hour? hmm

Winefiend Sat 03-Aug-13 19:13:23

Actually, I really want cake now.

lurkinglorna Sat 03-Aug-13 19:34:01

My kettles broken a bit like my dream of True Love so I'm eating the cake dry and boiling water in a pan for tea. I want to go to the chippy, maybe you should take one for the team Winefiend?

48howdidthathappen Sat 03-Aug-13 19:42:37

Oops. Realised I haven't mentioned Oww and her date with Alpha. Have a lovely time.

Years ago my eldest sister cut all her husbands (newly weds) sarnies into hearts. That went down well on a building site. A cautionary food/love tale grin

Yep DFU Enough said smile

Bant Sat 03-Aug-13 20:01:57

Okay, email sent to Zita. I am now kind of single, but also in a very very long distance relationship with the Mermaid. We've been mailing and chatting lots, she's on her way back to California at the moment.

I'm not sure if I said the backstory on her.. years ago I used to travel a stupid amount with work, and I'd be over in California at head office every few weeks - sometimes two or three weeks, sometimes as much as 6 weeks, and I almost always stayed in the same hotel. So I'd get off a 14 hour flight, jetlagged as hell, and walk into the hotel reception, and there would come this cry of 'Baaant!!!' and Mermaid would run across from the bar and give me a hug, then pour me a pint of beer and we'd sit and chat for a couple of hours every night when I was there.

After a couple of years of this, and of me thinking maybe moving to California wouldn't be so bad after all, except she was too young for me (23 when I was 30, I'm odd like that) we exchanged email addresses and I got unexpectedly laid off, met my XW, had kids etc - but we stayed in touch as friends and met up a couple of times when I was over there for work. She got married, I did, we both divorced in the last two years.

It turns out she'd had a crush on me and was always pestering reception to find out when I was coming in next so she could work that shift. I'd been planning work trips over there to see her, more than to do work.

And now she's on her first flight ever back from Europe to California, so I mailed her to tell her that the jetlag she's feeling now she's landed and can read the email is what I used to feel every time I arrived, but she always made my day hugely better when I heard that shout and saw that smile..

I am completely stupid getting involved with someone 1/3 of the way round the world. But sometimes you can't help it.

Bant Sat 03-Aug-13 20:02:30

shit. Zita = Aruba. Whoops. Pseudonym accidentally dropped there. Sorry.

Bant blush It doesn't matter now though does it?

I think that the 'situation' concerning Mermaid is something that will have to be explored. But be careful LDR of that length can sometimes force decisions to early on...(said she who got engaged to an American far too early on in the relationship as it was a lot of flights etc without a commitment.)

But you are a wise, wise man, so I am sure you will tread carefully.

I have had about three messages from different blokes saying this: 'Out of my league. Gutted sad ' - reverse psychology I suspect as one two different dating sites.

Still a bit 'meh' although have been 'mailing a man a day'. It's going okay a couple (suitable men) I want to arrange to meet/Skype very soon.

Have run out of decorating puff. sad

TigsytheTiger Sat 03-Aug-13 21:45:26

can I just say, whilst having a bit of a stealth boast, okay not so stealthy, but Mr EA (ex army) is physically the confident, have a word type with lots of banter but who is also a decent sorted honest man who accepts me as I am and even finds my annoying little habits endearing. This time last year I was going through the most horrendous time of my life and couldn't imagine living for the next day let alone the rest of my life and would never ever have imagined meeting someone new and starting over again, but it happened, it does happen.

scrazy Sat 03-Aug-13 22:13:57

Tigsy, that is so lovely for you. Reading your post gave me chills as it's along time since I've been heartbroken and I never want it to happen again, but so great that you are happy now smile

Bant Sat 03-Aug-13 23:48:51

So no update from OWW? Should we assume she's had some success with Alpha?

JoAlone Sat 03-Aug-13 23:50:38

Tigsy, that gives me a little hope, glad you had a good time.

OhWesternWind Sat 03-Aug-13 23:51:00

Back home after a wonderful, wonderful evening with Alpha. Every time I see him he's lovelier. I think we are getting closer emotionally all the time and it's just fantastic. (I know, total overuse of superlatives in this post but I am just so happy).

This is so different from things with LM and I'm amazed now I thought that was good. Things with Alpha are so easy and straightforward, neither of us is playing games and it is just unfolding exactly as it should.

The no sex thing is soooooo frustrating but because we've been concentrating on getting to know each other it's actually been a really positive thing for me, despite all my complaining. I think we have a real connection.

Hospital appointment all arranged now but should be able to see him in the week before then. I'm hoping so much that that all gets sorted out and then we'll be right.

grin grin grin

lurkinglorna Sun 04-Aug-13 00:05:54

whoop whoop OWW i think you're excused excess use of superlatives in this case smile and LOADS of luck and good vibes for the appt.

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