i am having a bit of difficulty at the mo. My H has moved out of our home two weeks ago (cant use the words seperated yet) His behaviour was awful over the past number of years. I tried to forgive him but seem to be stuck in the past. Dont know if i am right and wise not to forgive or whether i should try and move on and have a happy life with him. If i was to move on with him believe me it would not be in the immediate future, major counselling would need to be done on both sides. He loves me i know that much for sure. I love him but he has alot of flaws. I thought i would feel so relieved once he had left but i dont - i feel devastated and am going downhill not getting better.
hadnt told anyone he had left (except one family member) then over the weekend a friend called with wine and of course it all came out. felt a right fool the next day - had told her things that went back years ago as if they were in the present tense. i dont know what i was doing dragging up all that stuff as if it only happend last week. she was suitably shocked and texting all the time now to see if im ok. why did i say anything??
I have become depressed over the past couple of years and am going to counselling which i find useless. He is also going to counselling.
So there you have it. Depressed, trying not to overdo the alcohol as i am prone to do. 3 dc's, got my P45 last week but had been out sick for 14 months so no suprise there, unsustainable mortgage, losing friends by the minute.
am so confused - one week i think i am donig great am happy my marraige is over and the next i am thinking maybe there are ways to save it. i hate this...
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am sooo confused.......tearing myself apart
6 replies
evaeoin · 15/07/2013 16:24
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