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Relationships

Sordid discovery - or could it be innocent? What do you think?

92 replies

Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:04

Earlier today I needed to send a photo via email. Was on DHs iPad so sent it via his email. Checked to see it had gone and instantly saw in the sent folder an email DH had sent to a yahoo cn email (china?) a few weeks ago when he was on a business trip to LA. the address was 'Asian massage'. The email was blank - just a self taken photo of DH. He was wearing a t shirt and looked a bit scruffy - in bed maybe? He had sent it at 9am on the Monday morning, LA time. What is that all about? Thoughts please.

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ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 07/04/2013 20:09

He's sent a photo of himself to someone for some reason.

Google the email address he sent it to and see what comes up.

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CajaDeLaMemoria · 07/04/2013 20:09

Did you note down the exact email address?

Search it, both in his email server and online. See what comes up.

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:19

I did that and nothing at all comes up. 'no results found'

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:21

By the way looked again at it and he def sent it from bed.

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ImperialBlether · 07/04/2013 20:24

Have you had reason to mistrust him before, OP? It seems odd that he's sending a photo of himself if he was wanting a massage. Was there anything else in the Sent messages that was a concern? Was there anything in the Bin?

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deliasmithy · 07/04/2013 20:31

I'd be checking the internet search history etc.

And then I'd explain what happened and ask for an explanation.

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SlumberingDormouse · 07/04/2013 20:35

Very odd. I'm struggling to think of a reasonable explanation, dodgy OR innocent!

Could it have been some kind of a mistake? I can see how it would be possible to accidentally send one of my iPhone photos to an email address I've used before. It would only take a few taps. Having said that, I've never done it! Perhaps an app could have sent it? Seems unlikely though.

If it's not a mistake, it does seem odd that your DH would send a photo of himself to a legitimate masseuse (reminds me of another recent thread about massages!). I have heard of men sometimes sending photos to prostitutes though, often penis shots but sometimes normal ones. I don't know why, but apparently they do. I hope that's not the explanation.

I suggest you email the address yourself (maybe from a different account to your usual one). Send a photo of a man and/or ask for a massage, then see what comes back. You may get nothing, a whole load of spam, or perhaps a reply from a legitimate or sexual 'masseuse'. You'd probably get to the truth that way.

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:41

Nothing in sent messages or bin on ipad. He has a code on his phone - to keep kids off it he claims. I know he looked at Asian porn years ago. Should I confront him now?

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:48

Sorry cross posted with you dormouse. That was my first instinct - sent a blank email a few hours ago but was from my account with my name - so not surprisingly have had no response. Good idea to send one of a man pic. Will do that if poss!

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 20:49

Do u think he could have spent night with escort and was sending a pic to her to remember him by?

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BrianButterfield · 07/04/2013 20:55

Could it be a virus that takes a photo from your webcam? I know it sounds farfetched but it can happen! Did it look like he took the photo on purpose?

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ArtVandelay · 07/04/2013 20:56

Is he looking at the camera? What is his expression?

I've accidently photographed myself before but then the photo is offcentre with a slack jawed expression not looking at the camera (gormless).

It's very strange and I'm not surprised you are concerned.

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ArtVandelay · 07/04/2013 20:58

I admit I don't have asianmassage at yahoo.cn in my address book though, sorry :(

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Charbon · 07/04/2013 20:58

I think this is prostitution, yes. Whether the photo was taken before or after is anyone's guess although I'd suggest it was before so that the client who turned up matched the photo requested in the booking process.

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CabbageLeaves · 07/04/2013 20:59

D'ya know I've never accidentally sent a picture of myself in bed to an email address called maleescorts@....

I think it's highly unlikely it's innocent!

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 21:02

He was looking at camera.

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SlumberingDormouse · 07/04/2013 21:04

I agree about his expression and posture being important. I'd say it's more likely that a man would email an escort a picture before meeting her rather than after. Don't forget of course that prostitution is illegal in the US so the risks involved are much greater on both sides than they would be over here. Thus, there may be greater secrecy. But we're getting ahead of ourselves! I hope you get something back from the email address soon. A male-looking name or picture might work better though.

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littlebitofthislittlebitofthat · 07/04/2013 21:04

look in his BCC (blind carbon copy)

If I want to send an email to 5 people and I don't want them t know each others details i'll send myself an email with the 5 people in the BCC

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SlumberingDormouse · 07/04/2013 21:05

X-post again: looking at camera is not good, sorry. My accidental photos are always very blurry and candid.

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TweedWasSoLastYear · 07/04/2013 21:05

Could be for hotel entry?
A photo for a " masseuse " so she can recognise the ' client ' in the foyer of the hotel?
Some hotels prefer only to let registered guests in with hookers up to the rooms, so meeting downstairs in foyer or bar make room access easy.

or could be for another much less seedy reason , but i doubt it

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littlebitofthislittlebitofthat · 07/04/2013 21:05

it could be that he was bored and trying to work out how to take and send photos.....

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ImperialBlether · 07/04/2013 21:12

Right, littlebitofthis, do you believe that?

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SlumberingDormouse · 07/04/2013 21:14

I've emailed photos before with a blank subject when I was working out to use it all, but to myself. Wouldn't dream of emailing those test photos to anyone else, especially not massage services!

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Mondrian · 07/04/2013 21:21

1-Escorts or prostitutes don't require your picture to make a booking, also very unlikely that he would send her a picture afterwards.
2-Once the deed is done neither party would want a reminder.
3-if he was in LA and the mail address was in China (cn) then there was definitely no physical contact.

Therefore the only likely scenario would be porn related or one of those girl in asia looking for husband sites ... I am guessing its more of a porn/fantasy/kicks kind of an issue and no need to blow it out of all proportion ... Still good to have a low level indirect chat about it. Many men have fantasies that they don't share with their wives so best to bridge that gap.

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Katy71 · 07/04/2013 21:22

He works in media and certainly knows how to send photos! The fucker. Don't know whether to confront yet. Have just sent email asking for a massage from a 'mans' email account.

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