Going to try and keep this brief. Married 15yrs, 2 lovely kids under 11. Me and dh get on brilliantly have a laugh, great teamwok parenting, lovely extended family, both of us have lots of friends. Lots to be grateful and happy about.
We do however have horrendous money problems that have been going on for 7/8 years. Came to a head 18mths ago and we are now hopefully through the worst but now credit blacklisted for 10years, huge mortgage, massively in debt (but under control in a debt management plan) . Dh is self employed full time. I am self employed part time
I am naturally an outgoing, chatty, emotional, passionate person. Dh is calm, collected and quiet. We work well together as a couple or have done in the past.
Situation over laat 6mths is that dh copes with money worries by becoming distant going in his shell not talking very much, he doesn't vo out anymore with his friends and is just permanently working or thinking about work and money.
I cope with money worries by doing anything and everything to take my mind of fhem. I have 2 hobbies and clubs that I belong to, live on Facebook and texting, go out with my friends (for walks a coke) and do loads of exercise.
As a result we are now living totally different lives and just drifting apart and becoming disconnected.
I have talked fo him told him I am worried about him, said he needs to do something else just to give him a break from thinking. He is no longer affectionate, sex has always been rare And rubbish between us but he has, in the past, been kissy and cuddly and holding hands etc. Thisa has
stopped.
He says he is ok, just utterly wrapped up in work and money and that is all it is. I feel bad complaining because I know he is slogging his guts out to try and make things better for us.
I am just worried that if this carries on there will be nothing left of me and him to save!
Anyone experienced similar? Do I just take him at his word and let him get on with it?
( I am 99.999% sure he is not having an affair. He has sexual issues which means that he doesn't like sex, he has been like this site since I have known him. I have checked his phone and emails and facebook, he never logs out of anything and it ia all just work, work, work stuff)
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Relationships
Money worries pushing us apart
10 replies
eyeeyecaptain · 22/02/2013 21:31
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