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hes a WANKER!

7 replies

StuffezLaBouche · 10/02/2013 17:35

Sorry for the awful typing, am internet-less so on crappy phone.
Six.months ago i moved back to my.old.uni city, where i had an appalling relationship about ten years ago. The bastard was.emotionally abusive and coerced me into doing sexual things i didnt want to. I cant use the R word because ive experienced.that from someone else and ... I cant liken those experiences.
I knew it was only a matter of time before i ran into the cheating wanker but it finally happened yesterday by a bar... It was excruciating. He was with a mutual acquaintance so there was a 'buffer' at least but it was so so awkward. I finally decided to be the bigger person so i asked how he was. I was literally shaking. He gave a one word answer in the most hurt and wounded tone imagineable. While i excused myself to the mate he just kept staring at me all wounded and.hurt... As if i were the bad guy!
I feel shit at how i handled the situation. I feel shit it got to me ao much. I feel embarrassed at myself for being with him. He was dressed up like a fucking Racist with his union jack trousers and skinhead. He is 34 years old with a 18 year old 'partner' with a baby.
Sorry for the poorly written rant, i just needed to get it out.

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StuffezLaBouche · 10/02/2013 17:37

Im really not illiterate! My phone was designed for skinnier thumbs..

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dondon33 · 10/02/2013 18:30

Sounds shit but all you can do is learn from that encounter and be ready for next time.
He is in your past for a reason - personally I'd ignore him if I bumped into him again, he's certainly not worth your stress nor your time.
Take care

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MarilynValentine · 10/02/2013 19:29

Sounds horrible. He sounds really horrible Angry.

And I agree with the poster above - move on by ignoring him. He's trying to continue the drama by acting like a wounded soldier (what a prick!). You were attempting to normalise a difficult situation but it sounds like he's the sort of arse who will never be adult and responsible enough to give you a calm, level, emotion/blame free response. Stop expecting him to. So ignore. Nod if he says hello I suppose but don't respond or initiate anything.

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StuffezLaBouche · 10/02/2013 21:53

Thanks for the kind words both of you. I know it was a rant more than a plea for advice, so your comments are appreciated. Just a bit apprehensive as ive heen up here for six.months and have no friends, but lately an old uno friend has been in.contact trying to meet up... Id like to socialise with her, butshe's still friendly with his old crowd, i think.
I can be polite and detatched if the situation demands it, but im not willing to be in the wanker's circle of friends. Bloody small cities!!!!

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dondon33 · 11/02/2013 12:44

Could you explain to this old uni friend that you'd love to meet up but not with the dickheads crowd - it could open doors to meet other new people that she knows outside of that circle. If she knows about your history then she'd understand.
What about work mates - can you not suggest a night out with some of them?

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dondon33 · 11/02/2013 12:46

Could you explain to this old uni friend that you'd love to meet up but not with the dickheads crowd - it could open doors to meet other new people that she knows outside of that circle. If she knows about your history then she'd understand.
What about work mates - can you not suggest a night out with some of them?

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 11/02/2013 12:49

You seem to have read a heck of a lot into a one word answer.....

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