I am a regular but haven't been on MN for a while because we just did the house up and the kids and and and...
I want to outline what has happened without giving too much away to out myself but hope you fellow MNers can help me see straight again.
We have 3 very young children. We moved countries 3 times in less then 6 years.
Yesterday I have found out that in the beginning of 2009 my husband got senselessly dunk on a flight, then hooked up with the air hostie and shagged her in that hotel room.
He said nothing else happened but back in our then living location she contacted him for money and he lent her some which she has subsequently paid back.
I have tried to contact her as she emailed him again 2 days ago (that's how I found out about it): It said: wishing you a blessed new year may it bring lots of happiness, blah blah. Then he writing back: so nice to hear from you, please don't lose my contact details.
She responds: I never will lose your details, I am very sorry about what happened. I never wanted us to end this way.
WEIRD???
I am going out here on a limb but I suspect he got her pregnant and she needed an abortion. I just know it. He cheated on his first wife (I found out from her AFTER we were married).
After I confronted him he admitted to the shag but nothing else. He blamed me for not being there as I had gone back to my parents for 3 weeks to pick our then baby daughter up and bring her home while we moved.
---
He then told me that he put sperm on ice for a female friend who came into his life after we were already an item. She made a massive play for him, she is an older, single rich trust fund babe inviting him to schmooze with royalty, vips, etc but when I got pregnant she basically settled for his sperm which he donated but she couldn't use as she wasn't physically well and is now in her mid to late 40ies.
I am trying to hold it together for my babies but he makes my skin crawl and I feel sick to the stomach.
To make matters worse we had agreed to try for a 4th baby and I may be pregnant. I am reeling, my world has folded and I don't know what to do.
We have no cash to spare, I can't move to my parents who have a tiny place and are both ill and old. I don't want to impose on them. I have no friends to run to, no one who can help.
I was so angry yesterday that I chucked a glass of red wine in his face and slapped him on the cheek only to find my 4 year old daughter standing behind me.
I know what I have done is wrong. i don't want to damage my girls.
Please can anyone advice me? I am shaking as I write this.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
My DHs betrayal has knocked me sideways and I cannot function (OW and frozen sperm)
Amouage · 04/02/2013 13:47
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