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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

The Great Escape

734 replies

GoodtoBetter · 18/01/2013 07:24

I thought I would start a new thread, for anyone who might be interested in listening to my waffling on about my struggles with a difficult, overbearing mother. Thank you to whoever it was who suggested the thread title! I've changed my name for something a bit more positive.
previous thread here:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1565077-My-mother-hates-my-husband-long

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ThreeTomatoes · 18/01/2013 08:10

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boschy · 18/01/2013 08:14

theme tune is playing in my head now! Grin

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NettleTea · 18/01/2013 08:22

good title and very positive name xxx
have fun at IKEA

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Herrena · 18/01/2013 08:31

Glad you like it Grin excellent new NN by the way!

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DoodlesNoodles · 18/01/2013 09:28

Great title, great name change. Smile

Have fun at ikea

asks the impossible

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pictish · 18/01/2013 09:32

Great title! I will be following you onto this thread too. It has been an amazing journey! xx

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pictish · 18/01/2013 09:32

Just saw your new NN. Love it!

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lizzypuffs · 18/01/2013 10:06

Very positive name change and I love the title!

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DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 18/01/2013 10:40

Thanks Like the name change!

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Emandlu · 18/01/2013 12:05

I've been following your progress on the other thread, I have been quite aghast at your mothers behaviour.

I love the new nickname and wish you the best for your new place!

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Aussiebean · 18/01/2013 12:15

A great name and a great title. Start as you mean to go forward. All positive.

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Hissy · 18/01/2013 14:09

Hooray!

Love the NN!

The email is all about the drama. Your DB is well able to diffuse it, if it suits him to wait, then he can wait. All he need do is say, no rush. It'd be daft to sell a house now in Spain, perhaps in a year or so's time, things there may have improved a bit. It could be rented out over the summer to help with upkeep.

Don't get dragged into anything, stay cool, focus on the freedom ahead, not the turmoil you are leaving.

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Jux · 18/01/2013 16:15

Yeah, splendid NN and splendid thread title Grin Lovely to see you being more positive and upbeat.

That IKEA song is running through my head now, it made me laugh and dd actually snorted from across the room at the first chorus! (We have 3 bookcases called Billy Blush but we also have 3 from Argos which are a better size, half the price, but not quite so sturdy so nuts to you Ikea!).

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Anniegetyourgun · 18/01/2013 16:27

I beg to differ. I got cheap bedroom furniture from Argos when I first moved in here and it's quite nasty. Later I eked it out with an IKEA chest of drawers which was massively better quality at very little more expense. Mind you bookcases may be a different kettle of... books.

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ThreeTomatoes · 18/01/2013 16:41

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Jux · 18/01/2013 17:06

We've only had them all a few months, so I bow to your superior experience! The Argos ones are not so deep which is better for us. The proof will be when we have to dismantle them and put them up again - the cheap ones will fall apart and the Billies won't.

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GoodtoBetter · 18/01/2013 19:13

Been one of those days...had a meeting in the morning and went to the wrong building and was 15 mins late. Arrived puffing and red in the face from having to run walk really fast to get to the right place. Was supposed to have choir practice after, which is a new thing I'm doing...had the first one while DM did a runner and loved it...but had to miss it because a guy was supposed to be coming to quote for removals. The bastard never turned up or even rang to cancel.

Ended up going with another one who can only do Friday and it looks like it's going to cost more than I'd hoped. Going to try to box up as much as poss this weekend before he comes to do the final estimate o Monday and try to reduce the cost a bit that way. Spent the afternoon marking and writing reports.

DS had a total freaking meltdown tantrum this afternoon so we decided to go to ikea to have a quick look at the bed I need to order for him (DM reneged on the offer of letting me take the stacking beds in DS' room, but is probably better that way). Overtired-not-quite-five-year-old + ikea = fucking nightmare.
Got nothing useful done except eat hotdogs. Going to make a big list and go back tomorrow first thing when it's quieter.

Period on it's way and got backache. At the moment there really aren't enough hours in the day.

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ThreeTomatoes · 18/01/2013 19:17

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GlaikitFizzog · 18/01/2013 19:41

Have you called the non turning up removal man? Just to check he wasn't "cancelled" on your behalf?

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GoodtoBetter · 18/01/2013 19:47

No, she doesn't know who I called. The man was just fucking useless.

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tribpot · 18/01/2013 19:53

Doubtful the removal man would speak English well enough for newly-named GoodToBetter's mum to have cancelled him, Glaikit. Possible but more likely just flakey.

Hope you manage to get a bit of peace and quiet this weekend.

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Dozer · 18/01/2013 19:58

Not long to go, all the moving hassle (sympathy) will be well worth it.

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GlaikitFizzog · 18/01/2013 20:10

Was just thinking out loud, sorry GoodtoBetter, I've been following your thread but not posted before. You have come on so much since you began.

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GoodtoBetter · 19/01/2013 06:46

OMFG I'm so so tired and so so much to do.

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tribpot · 19/01/2013 08:04

GoodtoBetter, as you've got the keys to the flat, you could start taking stuff over and dumping it all in one room to sort out after? (Not an easy game if it involves then having too much furniture in another room and having to move everything around like that game of sliding squares where there's only one free space!)

What I did when I moved here, as it was only a mile from my previous house, was I got friends to help me pack up portable stuff - clothes, books, kitchen stuff, DVDs, etc etc and then got the removal firm to just take the furniture.

Here you don't have a deadline to get everything out, as even your mum isn't going to sell off anything you've left after 24 Jan! But I would assume you don't want to have the conversation with her about whether you can leave some bits to pick up over the next few days. Is there anywhere else you could store stuff that you're not going to need immediately?

More importantly, you have to rest - moving house is a marathon, not a sprint.

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