I've been seeing someone coming up to 6 months although we have known each other for around 10 months. The start of our relationship was rather intense and we both got a little carried away with it all with talk of living together etc despite barely knowing each other. Then he put the brakes on and more or less said we were moving too fast and we needed to bring it back into the real world. I was gutted at first because I took it as an indication that he was going off me but we stayed together and everything has been ok since. He's great to be around, he's funny and kind, treats me with respect, helps me where he can and is always coming up with ideas for us to do. However, we seen to have come to a complete standstill regarding the overall relationship. We never talk of future plans anymore, all talk of me meeting his family have stopped and no suggestions at all regarding me meeting his kids.
Infact, he seems terrified of commitment at all. I know he had a hard time with his divorce etc but if he can't get over it, should he even be in a new relationship? He's terrified of his kids doing one on him if they react badly to his new relationship - so how long is he planning to pretend that dad will never move on? his kids are 16 and 17 years old - the "I don't want to upset the kids" excuse is starting to wear a bit thin.
I'm trying to be sensible, we're only 6 months in but I feel so confused about everything now. On the one hand I love being with him but on the other hand I think how nice it would be to be with someone who didn't have a ton of "issues" hanging over their heads. I suppose if everything wasn't so intense at the start it wouldn't seem so bad but I kind of feel like I've been "dumped" and then "picked up" again at a much slower pace. Almost as if he realized I wasn't that great and so decided to do a double take on the whole thing. I'm probably being stupid but I can't help thinking I'm wasting my time here if he's always going to have this cloud of "issues" hanging over his head.
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Relationships
Trying to make sense of my feelings. Is it me, or him??
16 replies
IntoxicatedWithMadness · 02/01/2013 16:22
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