Nearly name changed, decided not to.
DP and I have been together over a year, neither of us were looking for a relationship when we met, but we fell into one quite nicely. He is wonderful in so many ways, especially when it comes to my health - leaves work (self employed) to take me to hospital, to go over my therapy sessions after, watches DS so I can see my teams without a three year old present. He is brilliant with DS, kind of all I ever wished DS's dad would be, to be honest, and is more excited than me at times when DS learns new things.
He has done wonders for my self confidence in so many ways, both by the way he is to me, and the way he has put me in touch with other people to allow me to start working on and off again (I've been ill for over five years now, and just doing the odd day every now and again for people has made such a wonderful difference to the way I feel about myself). Things that I couldn't - and wouldn't - have done alone.
He can cope when I am ill mentally, and I have had full psychotic episodes without him batting an eyelid. I am able to be honest about my mental health to the point that I now don't even need to tell him how I am feeling - he knows. At times when I have been suicidal, he has sat down and discussed it logically with me, instead of freaking out.
Really, he is very special. We have a wonderful time together, alone and with DS.
However... There are little things that are starting to nag at me. I'm not sure how silly these will sound.
He tells little lies. I'm friends with his housemate (something he was NOT happy about at first, though he introduced us), and know he has told me he is with her when he isn't, and told her he is elsewhere when he is with me... Things like that. I did ask him about this once, and he said it was because he didn't want to upset the housemate, which I can understand, because she is quite sensitive, but its still annoying. There is nothing going on between the two of them, by the way. She has a boyfriend, who I have met, and is also seeing someone else, that DP collects her from sometimes. I don't feel insecure with their friendship.
On Christmas morning (he was with his family, and I was with exPs family so they got to see DS for Christmas) he sent me a lovely text, a little poem that was really sweet an touching... Until I was speaking to the housemate later that evening, and found out he'd sent this same personal text to her. She'd text me to ask if I'd heard from him because she'd received this poem, and thought it was a bit odd, and obviously written for me. Again, I fronted him about it (was slightly sarky) and he back tracked pretty swiftly. When he got home and saw her after I'd asked him, he was apparently very embarrassed that I'd been upset by this. Good. This isn't the first time he's included me in a ''mass text'', whether it was designed for me or not.
We swapped Christmas presents on Friday. I'd been planning his presents since about August (not wildly expensive, but a lot of thought had gone into them). Mine were all book themed. One was a book cover poster (that he told me he chose from a selection of posters; he happened to pick one of my favourite books, but didn't know that!), one was a set of flash cards for ''500 greatest books of all time", and the other two were books. The two books, one was the history of a special place we had visited on holiday, which was lovely. The other books was so random, he had obviously just typed in my interest into amazon, and picked the first one he hadn't seen on my book shelf. Not trying to sound ungrateful, am looking forward to reading them... But all four themed around the same thing? It feels like all he has done is thought, "Right. Present for SirBoob. She likes books.".
There are lots of other little things that are starting to grate on me. I don't know if I am overreacting though. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and have big issues with relationships, so I simply do not know what is okay, and what is not. I may well be taking it all far too much to heart, considering how great he is to me the majority of the time.
Sorry for the essay Would appreciate your feedback.
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Relationships
Starting to loose my temper with DP. Tell me if I'm over reacting...
16 replies
SirBoobAlot · 31/12/2012 12:08
OP posts:
ladyintheradiator ·
31/12/2012 14:20
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