Just that really. To all of you (us) who decided that 2012 was - or 2013 will be - the year to cut out the dead wood and move on.
Yes, leaving a relationship is hard. But staying with someone who treats you like shit and makes you feel like shit, is never the way forward.
I don't often post, but am on here all the time. Personally, I have been having my own, major-league wobble this Christmas, about my decision more than 12 months ago, to leave my lying, cheating Ex. It's a tough time of year.
Even when he shat on me - yet again - this year - by introducing our 3 yr old DS to his new GF on Christmas Day, without mentioning it to me - I was still wondering if I had done the right thing.
However, coming on here and seeing how everyone else is doing - Choco, Skyblue, Lou, and just now Stuffit (GO girl!) has made me realise I did make the right decision and has given me the kick up the arse that I needed. It is bloody hard. But at least we are all moving forward and not stagnating anymore.
Yes, being single (well, have been dating, but it's not really working) is hard. And I desperately miss the person I thought ExDP was and the life I thought we would have. But that is an illusion. He is not - and never will be - the man I thought he was. And staying, and hoping that he would turn into him, was destroying me.
There seem to be so many lovely sounding women, being treated badly by men - but really it is only BECAUSE WE LET THEM.
So, those of us that can, let's make 2013 the year to stamp out any cocklodging behaviour in our lives. There really are some lovely guys in the world too - we mustn't, mustn't put up with the arseholes - it just enables them, and makes them think that they can treat all women badly.
People make mistakes, and yes, some things can be repaired / mended. But some things are just unacceptable and unforgivable - and I think , deep down, we all know what is and what isn't.
I know that it's not easy - really I do. But there is always something you can do. Small steps. Always someone you can talk to. And then, one day, after you've been practising, the small steps get bigger and bigger and you can walk, then run...
And here is an excellent place to start. Really, you regular guys, who are here week in, week out, always helping and advising - thank you, thank you, thank you. I don't think you'll eve realise just how much your words and advice mean.
Happy New Year and good luck everyone.
DA X
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Relationships
Bloody well done
Datingagain · 31/12/2012 11:22
I was feeling a bit low till I read this thread. Positivity is oozing from my screen!
Happy New Year all and here's to a taking-no-shite 2013 
x
Tallwivglasses, you are a mumsnet treasure, you're one of the peeps that help so many, so take that Pat on the back that you deserve, and keep up the good work!
no-one gets left behind Dooin, youjust shout if you need a boot up the arse cajouling....
Abso-bloody-lutely cheers to that
I wish the whole of womankind knew about MN and our entire culture was based on the values of this wonderful place.
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