Aworks website, anyone know what this is?

[npg1]

Hi everyone.

Well I read up a few things and it looks like its not good.

Me and OH have been together a year. He moved in in about july time. He had a credit card which has reached the limit and I told him to cut the card up as he struggles with payments. I have never seen a statement as he says they go to his parents house where he previously lived. I know this card worries him and I said I would be happy to use my savings money to pay the card off, £2000 in the course of about 5 months!

Anyway, today I am using his car, went into the boot and there is a bag with rubbish in etc and on top was a credit card statement so I decided to have a look. There are about 3 payments of £30- £50 each time to aworks. Now am I over reacting? How do I bring this up with him when he gets home tonight, 'oh by the way I saw a statement in the car'? am I a mugg for paying this all off?

We are getting married in september. Please help

[Malificence]

From other similar threads, awork is adult works, where prostitutes advertise, sorry.

[npg1]

yes thats what I thought.

[Charbon]

I remember reading about it on another forum once - and Malificience is right, but it seems there's a thread about it on this site too:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1204823-awork-does-anyone-know-what-this-is

Sorry

[GlaikitFizzog]

I was coming to say the same as Malificence, really sorry

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

"I know this card worries him and I said I would be happy to use my savings money to pay the card off, £2000 in the course of about 5 months"

You sound more like his mother than his partner. Aworks is only one part of the overall problem here; your relationship all seems way too much and too soon.

Why are you taking responsibility for what is actually his problem?. What has he actually done to address this; seemingly nothing much if his credit card statement was found in the rubbish.

Why do you want to enable him in such a manner; enabling only gives you a false sense of control. Who is also to say that he would not run up such debts again (and what has he spent this on?). Your own funds will then be spent.

[SardineQueen]

I'm so sorry that you have found this out.

[izzywhizzyswinterwarmer]

Unless you're happy with a sleazebag who is an habitual user of porn/prostitution, you should withdraw any offer you've made to pay off his credit card debt, cancel the wedding, and end this relationship without further ado.

I suggest you also get yourself tested for stds as it's entirely possible that he's used the site - //www.adultworks.com - to make contact with escorts (prostitutes) that he will have had sex with in rl.

[QuintessentiallyShallow]

Sorry.
Have you actually paid off his card for him? If so, you have possibly paid for him to have sex with escorts. So sorry.

Are you still going to marry him?

[npg1]

God this is all such a shock. No I havent paid off anything yet but I have paid £1200 towards the wedding.

All the money he earns he pays towards the rent and bills so he just pays minimum payment on the credit card as he cant afford anything else. I asked him if I could see a statement asd he seemed to reach the max limit very quickly baring in mind he only had it for 5 ish months before I got him to cut it up.

He has been in my house doing this, I just cant believe it.

But my biggest question is what do I say when he gets home as I have been looking through the bag?

[GypsyMoth]

Just tell him what you told us.

[Sausagesarenottheonlyfruit]

"I was looking through this bag of rubbish to make sure there was nothing personal in there before I threw it away."

[pinkandstripey]

You think your 'snooping' is the biggest misdemenour here????!!!!!!

Doesn't matter how you found it, if he asks then say he shouldn't have left it lying around!!!

[izzywhizzyswinterwarmer]

You're surely not thinking you owe him any explanation of how you came to see this statement? It was in the boot of his car ffs, and anyone opening the bag of rubbish could have seen it.

FWIW I wouldn't be listening to any explanation from him and I'd have his bags packed with 'the' bag and the statement on top waiting for him on the doorstep.

Do you have wedding insurance? If not, as there are 9 months to go before the soon to be cancelled event it's probable that you'll be able to recover what you've laid out.

Chalk any shortfall up to valuable experience, or get it back off him through the county courts if necessary - I'll be happy to help you draft a claim.

[npg1]

gosh I just cant believe all this. A few months ago I caught him on a dating website and he said he was looking for this best mate! I have just found another credit card statement from july with £80 worth of awork.co.uk payments on there. I also looked through the rest of the 'rubbish' in the bag and there were several statements from last yr with lots of payments.

U sure awork and aworks are the same thing lol? Just so I have my facts right

[AnyFucker]

The end justifies the means here

let him bluster about how you found out all he likes

But if you have any sense of self-preservation you wil dump his sorry ass today and keep it dumped

get back what deposits you can for the wedding and write the rest off

and in future, it's best not to bankroll a feckless man even before you find out he is a user of prostitutes and perhaps have some counselling to discover why you settled for such a poor example of a respectful relationship

I am very sorry this has happened

[izzywhizzyswinterwarmer]

When, in the not too distant future, you are happily married to a man who's worthy of your love and affection, I hope that you will be able to look back and see today as being your 'lucky day' - the day you found out that you were planning to hitch your star to an utter sleazebag and saved yourself years of mistrust and misery, not to mention the 2 grand that you were unwittingly intending to spend to fund his use of prostitutes.

[AnyFucker]

the dating website is probably just the tiny tip of a very large iceberg (as is often the case on these kinds of threads)

[izzywhizzyswinterwarmer]

There's absolutely no doubt. Any payments made to the adultworks site show on credit card statements as payment to awork.co.uk.

[npg1]

Just got back from school run. He will be back at about 6.30 and im just going to give him the statements and say can you explain please. I spoke to my friend on the phone and she said a prostitute wont be that cheap and it could be phone sex. I have worked out that he has done it on a date I went to work for the morning, straight after we came home from a lovely family holiday in spain!

[AnyFucker]

You need to have a think what you are willing to tolerate

Shagging a prostitute is a deal breaker but phone sex is not ?

An attached man joining a dating site is ok ?

marrying a feckless cocklodger is something you are prepared to do ?

I don't mean to fire questions at you, but I have the horrible feeling he is going to wriggle off the hook here and you will marry this absolute twat

[SardineQueen]

A quick google indicates that awork.co.uk is a website for sexual services.

I am so sorry about this, it must be such an awful shock. At least you found out before the wedding and before giving him lots of money.

[Becauseimperfect]

Yes a prostitute would be that cheap.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Sums of £30-80 will be to purchase aworks credits, which are spent on private galleries and webcamming. He probably hasn't shagged a prostitute, but check statements for cash withdrawals in the £100-150 region.

[npg1]

oh I definately have to make a decision and there is no doubt what he has been doing and ebraying me for months. Phone sex, prostitutes anything is discusting and im devestated. A little bit of porn on the net I think I can deal with but this is a huge issue