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Pretend gun battles at school playtime

8 replies

debs40 · 08/03/2010 16:41

DS is 7 with a working diagnosis of Aspergers (very intense interests, problems with social communication). He is obsessed by Star Wars and Indiana Jones and 'boy's' stories like this. He knows all the characters, the guns etc.He can pretend to shoot people etc when nervous but often just enjoys playing.

I have never encouraged this and we never had toy guns in the house when he was little but it has been impossible to stop and I think most boys his age seem to be like this - light sabre battles etc.

His teachers have said recently that he has made comments about 'shooting all the girls' - he doesn't like them! Understandably, they just done't want him talking like this in class - not that it was said in an open group (someone snitched on him).

He led the 'wake and shake' this morning and his teacher has put a note in his home/school book about him pretending to shoot or karate chop as part of his dance and having to tell him this is not acceptable.

There is then a note to say they observed him at playtime and that he was happy but that there was lots of 'gun play'.

I have said that I will speak to him about the class and how it is inappropriate but that I think it is difficult to stop this sort of thing at playtime unless there is a clear school policy for EVERYONE.

I understand that he needs for this not to spill over in to the class but I don't want him singled out in the playground as he is not actually doing anyone any harm.

It is so wrapped up with his 'special interests' and I think most of the time that this is the way he gets through school ....i.e. what makes school interesting (playtime shoot outs with friends). I know this isn't good but I manage to engage him in other things at home.But he's not at home, he's at school

Any views?????

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thecloudhopper · 08/03/2010 17:15

I myself don't like gun play but I have found that boys are boys and they just simply go through stages of being slightly obsessed with guns or any other weapon. I don't realy know what to say realy just that usually it is a stage they go through.

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carocaro · 08/03/2010 18:10

My DS2 is 7 and that is all they play at play time, Star Wars etc!

I have told him in the past to tone down the gun/shoot/dead/kill thing as pople don't like to hear it, told him to switch words to things like 'blast you' 'light sabre you' 'let's arrest them' 'lets round up the enemy guard'

it seemed to have worked, they can still have the fun without all the 'words' that seem to cause the bohter.

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2fedup · 08/03/2010 18:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

coldtits · 08/03/2010 18:26

it's not inappropriate, it's imaginative play. He is acting out the world around him.
It's no more an indicator of aggrssive tendancies than "Malibu Barbie Flies To Carebear Land" is an indicator of a child that's completely lost touch with reality.

show her thiss

and this

Simply saying "That's an outside game" might help him do it appropriately.

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debs40 · 08/03/2010 18:38

Thanks. That is really useful. I sometimes think, because it is harder for him to know what is socially appropriate, that the light is shone more ferociously on every aspect of his behaviour. As far as I know, all the boys play pretend gun battles outside, inside, it has to stop and this just needs reinforcing.

Good idea coldtits - easy way to remember!

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TheCrackFox · 08/03/2010 18:42

The teacher sounds like she has never met a 7 yr old boy before. Has she previously only taught at all girl schools before?

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debs40 · 08/03/2010 19:27

I know, it gets me down I tell you! There are two of them (class teachers) and they are both the same.

I quite agree he shouldn't pretend to be shooting people in the class but just tell him that.

One teacher said she had heard him say he was going to shoot someone and the children were very distressed about it. However, I understand from the TA that he had said this sat at his table, under his breath, and a little boy sat next to him put his hand up and told her. She took him out of class and gave him to the TA because she didn't 'know what to do with him'. The TA has been taking training on Aspergers.

Maybe they are just seeing a label and forgetting he's a little boy??

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coldtits · 09/03/2010 08:25

That sounds like precisely what they are doing - applying sinister motivations and reasons to perfectly normal behavior. It is NORMAL for 7 year old boys to threaten to shoot people with imaginary guns. And if a whole class is 'frightened' by this, the teacher needs to work on Logic with them - "Does James have a gun? no. So can he shoot you? No. So is there anything to be frightened of? No. So stop snitching, it's an unpleasant habit Jolly good"

Those who seek horses will find horseshoes on ants.

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