Tell me about waiting lists in reception please

[onthewaitinglist]

Am a regular but have namechanged as don't want to be recognised.

DD1 failed to get into our first choice primary school and started at another local school in September. We are on the waiting list for the first choice, apparently number 2 on the list.

It's a 2 form 60 place church school in the commuter belt outside London. We are basically waiting for someone to leave/move house etc.

Sometimes I feel really optimistic that it's all going to come right, other times I just feel so depressed about it all and think it's hopeless

So realistically what are my chances and how long will I have to wait ? How many children left your child's class in reception?

[FabIsVeryHappy]

No one can say how long it will be until you are offered the place, or even if you will be.

I think you have to embrace the school your child is at. You might find it better than you thought.

[domesticextremist]

How multicultural is it? My ds' school has a high churn rate with parents moving abraod for jobs etc.

[squiby2004]

I had this and after a whole year on the list was still in the same place so moved DD to private and best thing we could have done. I am happy, she is happy and is doing fantastically well now. I don't know if you are aware of this but if a child goes onto the list after you put your lo on it and is closer to the school or higher in the entry criteria than your child is your place goes down rather than up!!

[onthewaitinglist]

Squiby - yes I do know this and we have already gone up, come down, gone back up again - I think that is what is so soul destroying in that you never quite know what your chances are.

I am not at all dissatisfied with dd's current school - don't want to say too much without outing myself to anyone that knows me irl but the main advantage of first choice school would be the fact we would have a 3 min walk rather than the current 40 min round trip in the car (most of which is spent parking which is a nightmare and then walking anyway).

I have a DD2 who will start September 2011 but I will have to apply for her Oct 2010 - am really hoping to have got DD1 in by then or is going to be really hard to know what to do re DD2's application.

The school is not hugely multicultural but is in an affluent area where quite a lot of people posted to/from abroad.
Last year, apparently 4 children left during the course of reception - I am clinging to that as showing some hope.

[RollCorpseIntoHedge]

2 children from my son's class in reception. One to move to scotland and one to move to Singapore. No one has left for two years now so I wonder if this was unusual.

[BlueKangerooWonders]

Children are leaving all the time in my dc's school (small, church school)!

2 at end of ds's reception (offers to schools they preferred), others to move house after yr 1, two left in yr 3. Plenty of moves!

[hocuspontas]

Don't fret - I bet a place comes up soon!

IME there isn't much movement in yr but during the summer yr1 places usually become available.

Put dd2's name down for the new school. You will then have an even better chance of getting dd1 in - even if it means being in two places at once for a while!

[fridayschild]

DS1 had two or three classmates move out in reception - expats going back home.

His best friend was in the same situation as you, on a waiting list for the school his mum preferred. They never quite got to the top of the list, child loves the school, insisted the younger sibling go there too, and eventually in year 2 mum is reconciled to the school - I think. I do sympathise though, it makes a massive difference to your life to have such a pig of a journey twice a day.

[onthewaitinglist]

Thanks all, in the main I think your comments have heartened me

Hocuspontas - yes, I think that I will apply for DD2 to the waiting list school and deal with the 2 schools thing if we have to but hopefully it won't come to that. DD1 would be going into year 2 as DD2 starts so I definitely think there will have been some movement by then.

Fab - you are right about embracing her current school and I really feel that I am - have made some new friends, have got involved in pta events, planning to host coffee morning for mums in dd's class next term etc but it's just the school run that gets me down, especially now in winter - I just feel bad because I am wishing the weeks of dd's reception year away

[pooka]

We had same situation i.e. not first place school, 60 intake, on waiting list. We were initially at about 14th. Then 9th I think, then went up to the giddy height of 4th, then down to about 13th. Live about 400m from the school. Have gone up/down based on people leaving/people moving in closer to the school/people taking themselves off the waiting list.

DD is now in year 2 of the third choice school we were offered and loving it, and have just applied for ds to start there in September 2010. While it wasn't my first choice, it has been a great school for dd - all my anti-feelings about it related really to my sense of sorrow at saying goodbye to the friends who had children who did get into the first choice school. She has settled brilliantly. School has not-so good ofsted. Trickier intake. But is great nonetheless.

[pooka]

Sorry - rambled there. I suppose my point is that it can vary so hugely whether you go up or down a waiting list. And that even though I still get a pang of regret, dd is fundamentally happy. I had a cunning plan devised involving applying for ds to go to preferred school, then dd would be top of the waiting list for a year 3 place if he got in, if the catchment got bigger this year.

And then I just though f* - she's happy, he'll be happy. It's just me being narked at the school journey (a 20min walk instead of an 8 minute walk, with busy roads) and missing the bonhomie of the pre-school.

Sympathies though - it sucks when your nearest school is also oversubscribed.

[onthewaitinglist]

Thanks Pooka - your posts really resonated with me - you are right it is a sense of sorrow at (me and) dd not being part of the group we were in last year who did get in to the school (who ALL live further from the school than us but that's another story!!).

I suppose I don't feel ready to give up yet though as DD2 will be offered a place as I have made sure we don't make the same mistakes we did with DD1.

[pooka]

Ah well - if your dd2 will defo get a place, then certainly don't give up! Your dd1 should then whoosh to top of list as a sibling, albeit older. With dd and ds1, was extra advantage that if he got in, she would be top of list as sibling, and since she'd be going into KS2 (we have a 3 year gap academically between dd and ds1), the 30 cap on class places not as applicable, so the school would have probably had a class of 31 until next person left IYSWIM.

However - ds1's chance of getting in miniscule (as the catchment seems to be getting smaller, as if that were possible) and also there are some advantages to the current school - i.e. more outside place, dd has friends in both "camps" and so on. But do feel gutted for myself - the longer journey and missing the conviviality of the old place (particularly since ds1 goes to the pre-school at the first choice school).

[MumNWLondon]

At my DDs school 2 kids left at the end of reception and one durung BUT the school has empty places in years 4/5/6 and both places went to kids who turned up in the area but had older siblings in those years - although one person on the waiting list got a place when someone left after one term - we got a place from the waiting list as 4 children left at the end of nursery.

Most movement during summer - the child that left during reception was a twin and the mother realised she needed to have them at different schools (its one form entry), and she managed to get a place for one elsewhere.

Apply your younger child to your first choice - if they get in older child will move to top of list.

[PanicMode]

We were in the same boat last year - DS got into our second choice school, 14th on the waiting list - but DD is only a school year behind, so when we applied to our first choice school and she got in, he went to the top of the list as a sibling and started in Y1 this September.

He had a fantastic start in his reception year (smaller classes) but we had reservations about the school further up (we are in an 11+ area and the head "frowns on children who take the grammar route") so have moved him and couldn't be happier. The school we moved to has a larger intake than yours but has a fairly high level of churn, so don't lose hope!

[onthewaitinglist]

Just thought I would update to say that DD1 has been offered a place from the waiting list of our first choice school to start in YR after Easter. Thanks to all to told me to hang on in there and keep chin up .
Obviously am really pleased, now I just need to break the news to DD1 who is likely to be less so
Can feel another thread coming on "How did you break it to your YR child that you were moving them to another school midway through the year just at the point when they had made friends and were happy and settled? Do you still feel like the most selfish mum in the world for doing so?"

[sunnydelight]

Oh, congrats! I wouldn't worry too much about your daughter settling into a new school. Kids are amazingly resilient and you should be able to sell it to her on no more driving and back with her friends from pre-school. My tip (having moved DS2 after a half term break in Y1) would be not to say anything until just before the holidays. Give her a day or two to say goodbye, but not long enough to dwell on it.