Racist comments in Y5 - do I tell the teacher?

[southernsoftie]

My ds came back from school recently and when I asked him about his day (standard question to which the standard reply is "fine - can I go and play/have a snack/go on the computer please?") and instead he told how some other children in his class had been making racist comments, and that he had told them what they were saying was wrong and the response was that it was OK to be racist about this particular group. It had obviously upset my ds as it is rare for him to tell me anything much about his day. So, do I mention it to the teacher? I am actually really proud of my ds for trying to stand up against these comments but understand that he does not want the teacher to know that he has said anything for fear the other children will then ostracise him if they get into trouble. If you are a teacher would you want to know?

[Chellesgirl]

Yes I would. You should say something. Phone them and arrange meeting after school so that children dont see you and they cant relate you to your DS.

What did they say?

At the end of the day it isnt the children's fault - they just learn from what is around them, most likely close family.
So you should tell your Ds that these children do not realise how hurtful they are being and they dont really know what they are saying.

But the school have a right to know and instead of punishing the children they need to have meeting with individual parents and child to dicuss racism in school and in general.

Parents who allow thier chidlren to talk down to other children die to the colour of thier skin should be sent on some kind of course that takes up thier free time and so they ca learn what its like to be bullied as such.

[troutpout]

yes

[southernsoftie]

Thanks. DS knows it is wrong (after all, AIBU thread shows there are loads of reasons to hate people without ever needing to even think about race ) and did try to explain this to these children but they would not listen. They were saying that it is normal to hate Muslims and OK to kill them too . I slightly know the parents of the children concerned and I would not expect the children to have picked this up at home but I suppose you never can tell.

[Chellesgirl]

T.V/internet maybe. Its wrong anyway.

[smee]

If they're saying that it's really not on. Yes definitely you should tell the school. That's outrageous and needs to be sorted/ explained to them as really wrong. Are there any Muslims in the school for example. How awful for them if so.

[southernsoftie]

Just a quick update - I spoke to the teacher without my ds knowing. She was horrified at the comments and glad I had told her(although I got the impression that she was not that surprised at one of the names I mentioned).

My ds then said that "someone must have told the teacher" because they spent a lot of time discussing how wrong such comments were!

Overall a good outcome and I think the teacher seems to have handled it really well.

[smee]

Good. Really glad you sorted it.