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Frustrated! need a challenging school [state or ind]...share your opinions please

15 replies

ThingsWeDo · 15/01/2013 13:06

My DD now at yr 3 is at her 2nd state school. She is a free reader, writes well with no grammar or spell mistakes.... Maths is super easy for her. She would do 3 digit divisions without any fuss. Knows all her times tables.
Now her weaknesses : she wont speak up, she cannot explain things in detail. Its mostly nodding or yes/no answers. also lacks self motivation.
Her lovely school is really good in many ways but she is often asked to sit quietly and read because she finished her work quick. [They should leave her with an open ended question]
As a natural progression I reviewed and chose 2 independent schools for her to test and try a desk. She comes home and says it was easier than her current school also the kids are only just learning to arrange numbers and subtractions.
I'm frustrated I could not help her learn more when she is still willing to.

  1. Anyone know any school academically too good. Around guildford, newbury, BSK, reading pl.
  2. willing mums please give me a comparison on a yr 3's learning process. As in primary schools unwilling to let a bright child go anywhere beyond their expected level eg: level 5 at year 6 is the maximum this school could do.
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learnandsay · 15/01/2013 13:10

You could always find out what the level 6 extension work entails and do it with her at home on the kitchen table.

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annh · 15/01/2013 13:12

Where do you actually live? I can't believe that schools in both Guildford and Reading are going to be practical for your daughter at primary level? Which ones have you already tried? I also wouldn't base your beliefs on whether she will be stretched or not on one trial day, especially if she is reluctant to speak in class. In a new situation, she probably said nothing all day and a new teacher will have had no opportunity to assess her strengths. You need to speak to the schools about the level at which she is currently working, show them some examples of her work and ask what they would do to support her.

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musicalfamily · 15/01/2013 13:26

OP I am in exactly the same situation with my DD also in Y3. We are now putting her for an assessment for a selective private school as well. I just hope and pray it works out for her. She hasn't been for a taster day but I would hope they would do a better job of stretching her - won't know though until she gets there.......I am taking a risk.

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Lonecatwithkitten · 15/01/2013 13:41

Where have you already tried? It is also worth considering that when she tries a desk she will just do regular class work as it is about her trying the environment not stretching her.
DD is at a school in your area now in year 4 where they have a Maths group that is considerably accelerated and are streamed for English. PM me if you would like to know more.

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ThingsWeDo · 15/01/2013 13:49

I always spend time with her after school and clubs and before tv time for about an hour. I find worksheets and online resources and systematically stretch her into doing varieties. She does them alright but would not be chatty about anything. I just get yes/ no answers after my lengthy questions.
Dear Annh,
The tester day teacher said she answered her questions alright.... but chatty would be good. I am going to request another meeting with the school head and take her work along to discuss if they can convince me. we tried gems and daneshill and now booking dates with other schools.

Please suggest me a school

Is no mention of a times table or a multiplication on a maths session at year 3 very normal?

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majormother · 15/01/2013 14:23

It would be totally normal if that day they were focusing on shape or division or time!
They won't do every topic every lesson.

Additionally, as another poster suggested, you can't really expect them to differentiate for her on a taster day! You need to tell them a little more about your dd and then ask them what they do to differentiate and where she would sit - there might be some children working at her level anyway.

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ThingsWeDo · 15/01/2013 14:38

Dear Majormother,
It would beat the purpose if they changed anything just for my daughters tester day. I totally agree with majority of your opinions about talking to them heart to heart and getting the real picture to compare with.
Do you have any school names to suggest?
Much appreciated :)

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Saracen · 16/01/2013 01:12

Are you in a position to home educate your daughter? Then she would be able to do work which is exactly right for her. You seem to enjoy doing things with her.

You say that your daughter is less chatty than you would like. If she were the one driving the questions according to what interested her, I bet she would become more chatty. Perhaps she gives you short answers because your questions are not her questions at this moment. Maybe she feels she is being tested or made to work rather than following her own curiosity wherever it takes her.

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FeltOverlooked · 16/01/2013 08:05

16% of the children at the state school my children go to got Level 6 in English and Maths last year. So there are state schools out there that cater for stretching in those subjects. Not in your area, so no help there.

But if the problem is speaking out, then maybe you need to investigate drama or debating type clubs that will increase her confidence in public speaking.

Do you mean no mention of time tables in one session or over the year? I work in a year three class and we certainly mention them sometimes, but not every maths class e.g. if we were working on angles, time, directions, etc, it would not be relevant.

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ThingsWeDo · 16/01/2013 11:40

Thanks All! I'm sorry I came out meaning like that about times tables. I did know that a teacher would go back and forth to strengthen the foundation. Special thanks to Lonecat for the kindness.
You all rock! Its very comforting to lean on a best friends shoulders at times of distress. Afterall the worst pain is to watch our DD/DS in pain.

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cottoncandy · 16/01/2013 12:08

If you are looking for challenging schools in that area, Guildford High School junior school is very academic.

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ThingsWeDo · 16/01/2013 12:40

There is no room in GHS I was told cotton candy. Thanks for the suggestion.

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annh · 16/01/2013 12:46

Op, I just PM'd you but as I said there I don't think Guildford schools are at all practical for you unless you are prepared to move from Basingstoke. I just Googled and it is over 30 miles from GHS to centre of Basingstoke. That is just not feasible even at secondary level, never mind primary. i think you might get a better response if you start a new thread asking about schools in the Basingstoke area.

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Chandon · 16/01/2013 13:12

I moved my son at the end of year 3, so can sort of compare.

As his class is smaller, he now speaks out and raises his hand when he knows the answer, somehow his confidence has improved. In maths the private school was at least a year aheac, so he had some catching up to do. ( my other son is in year three now, and has done all times tables back to front, most kids know them by the end of year 2). Both my children get extension work when they finish early.

The main difference for me, is that at the new school they seem to have higher expectations of the children's ability.

But then, I would not dare to say all private schools are better than state schools! Just visit all schools in your area, and talk to the heads.

A quiet child, like yours, may do better in a smaller class and a less noisy environment ( in the old school it was encouraged to wander around and ask peers for advice, which led to very high levels of low level disruption)

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ThingsWeDo · 22/01/2013 13:33

Thanks Chandon! Which is your private school, might I ask?

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