Would you give a Xmas gift to your child's teacher but not the TA?

(40 Posts)
MayaAngelCool Tue 11-Dec-12 23:34:57

This term I've got to know DS's class teacher fairly well, and she is excellent. I'd like to get her a thank-you gift for the end of term.

This evening I remembered to my horror that there's also a TA in the class - I've only ever seen her once, and we had a brief playground chat. She's not a warm person at all, and I don't especially like what I've seen of her. However, I don't doubt that she does a great job in the classroom.

I'm feeling really bad about essentially forgetting her existence in my present planning, but it seems false to get a gift for someone I hardly know and don't particularly like. At the same time it feels wrong to just get one for the teacher.

I'm interested to know what you all would do in this situation.

Hulababy Wed 12-Dec-12 20:02:46

A fair few people do.
I'm a TA and some people do give to teacher and not the TA. Some give to both and some give to neither.

I am always appreciative of any thanks I receive in whatever form - card, letter/note or gift. They are appreciated and def not expected. I work with all the children, plus do PPA cover for the class too (as well as for 3 other classes - but parents would never see me in the other classes, only my main room).

For my DD's school - I ask DD who she wishes to give cards/gifts too.

DewDr0p Wed 12-Dec-12 20:06:41

I would always do both or neither.

Certainly at our school the TAs are very skilled and work very hard - they are a crucial part of the team and don't get paid an awful lot to boot.

survivingwinter Wed 12-Dec-12 20:22:52

I know what you are saying OP. My DS's TA has been less than friendly to me over the last 4 yrs I have had children going in and out of that class but I know she does some sterling work with my DS and has helped him a lot so I will be getting her a present to say thanks!

I am struggling this year with the whole teacher/presents thing because I do think it is nice to say thanks to teachers and TA's (they do work very hard) for families in real hardship I think it causes difficulties because it is the 'done thing'.

Fuzzymum1 Wed 12-Dec-12 21:20:51

I will buy for the teacher and both TAs - one of whom is a one to one for another child, but my son loves her and wants to buy for her.

Snog Wed 12-Dec-12 21:23:09

I wouldn't buy a TA present if I didn't like the TA unless my child really rated them

GW297 Wed 12-Dec-12 21:27:19

I'm with you snog!

Rudolphstolemycarrots Wed 12-Dec-12 22:02:01

I'd love to buy for the TA too but there are so many helpers in the class and I'd worry about leaving someone out.

ninah Wed 12-Dec-12 22:24:47

snog I agree
I'm a new teacher too, greensleeves, and you are lucky - it's not always the way - TAs (as teachers) do vary

Greensleeves Wed 12-Dec-12 22:33:31

I know ninah, I am very lucky at the moment (I am only doing supply, but lots of it in the same school, which is lucky in this area at the moment!)

I did encounter a couple of really disgusting people (teacher and TAs) when I was training. I saw one slap a child with SEN and another pick him up by one arm and one leg and dump him in a corner sad

would still treat my own children's teachers and TAs equally though unless I knew somebody was actually horrible.

ninah Wed 12-Dec-12 22:36:44

oh that's good, it can count for NQT then? I'm on a mat cover (come back lovely new mum, hurry! lol)

ninah Wed 12-Dec-12 22:39:08

for my own dc I just give to the people I think have done a great job really - and I also gave a TA a plant for clearing up dd's projectile vomit across the hall.

suebfg Wed 12-Dec-12 22:39:42

At our school, vouchers are given to the teacher and the TA but the teacher is given s higher value. I am a bit uncomfortable with this - surely they should get the same

GW297 Wed 12-Dec-12 22:49:46

If the TA is shared between 2 or even 3 classes they can end up with loads of gifts. I think the teacher should get more in recognition of the fact that they are the child's teacher. I wouldn't buy nice gifts for school staff I wasn't keen on or didn't rate and I wouldn't write nice things in their card that I didn't mean.

My daughter has made personalised mugs for her teacher and her one to one lady. I've just realised there are 2 TA's as well in her class! (She hasn't been there long). In my defence. Maybe I'll get them some chocs. smile

letseatgrandma Fri 14-Dec-12 20:36:06

I buy for teachers but not TAs. Some of the TAs flit between classes and are only with the children for part of the day-it would get expensive to buy for all of the TAs that work in my children's classes.

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