Out of the blue meltdowns - any experience?

(4 Posts)
Fuzzymum1 Fri 23-Nov-12 10:23:00

This might get long as I try to give all the information I think is relevant.

DS3 is 5 and in year 1. He is generally confident, sociable and well behaved. He goes to school just fine in the mornings, enjoys his time there and is thriving. He has plenty of friends and adores the staff there. On occasion he loses the plot in the playground before school and I have to drag take him into school kicking and screaming.

This morning we walked to school and he was happy and chatting. There was a sign up in the playground to say that the normal parents' assembly was cancelled this morning so I explained that to him as I normally go. From that point on he seemed unsettled and when the bell went he went to line up and then tried to run. I grabbed hold of him (or he would have been off who knows where). I asked him what was wrong and he wouldn't tell me other than saying "I'm not going to school". I calmly said "You have to go to school, you can either go in nicely or you can make a scene and have everyone looking at you" He said "I don't care!" From past experience I know that the more I try and calm him down the worse he gets so I took him by the arm and lead him into the classroom and left, as I left he had a teacher and a TA with him so he wasn't alone. I will have a chat to him after school about it and try and find out why he was so upset.

DH and DS2 both have asperger's syndrome so red flags are waving at me. DS3 is very different to both of them - he doesn't seem to have the social issues that they do and can definitely put himself in someone else's shoes and see things from their point of view. He is sensitive to clothing texture like DS2, for example he always wears socks inside out so the seams don't irritate, I often end up cutting labels out and he doesn't like clothes with embroidery on if it's a bit rough on the reverse etc.

Does this sound like normal 5yo behaviour or something I should investigate further? I'm sure with the history of ASD in the family I'm extra sensitive to behaviour issues but conversely I don't want to ignore something that could be a problem just because I think I'm being oversensitive.

redskyatnight Fri 23-Nov-12 11:16:26

I don't know if you are being oversensitive or not. However, when he was 5, my DS would have behaved as yours did (if something had been cancelled at the last minute that he was expecting) and he also has the same issues round socks, labels and irritating clothing. As far as I know there is no ASD issue for him - and I would say as he gets older (he's now 8) he is "growing out" of the traits (he still doesn't like last minute changes, but he's learnt to stop, take a breath and calm down rather than go straight into meltdown).

Fuzzymum1 Fri 23-Nov-12 11:44:28

Thanks for sharing your story - really don't think there is any ASD going on here, I just wish I could get inside his head and work out what's going on at times like this morning.

socharlotte Fri 23-Nov-12 14:03:19

He was just disappointed that you weren't going into assembley.

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