Days out with a pre-teen HELP!!

[stepmummy]

Hello,
My husband and I are in a bit of a tricky situation. His daughter is 12 now and lives 300 miles away from us. When we used to go to see her in school holidays when she was younger it was easy to entertain her. Farms, parks, craft days, even just drawing and painting in our hotel or holiday rental. However, now she is 12 going on 13 and its really hard. We go to see her for perhaps a week at a time and is not really interested in spending time with parents. She wants to be out shopping with her friends. Obviously if she lived with us this would be fine, but as we are only there for a week at a time we want to spend time with her. Is anyone else in a similar situation? If so, what do you do to entertain this age group when its concentrated time like this? Really struggling with this situation!

xx

[WallyBantersJunkBox]

How about a theme park trip? Book a hotel to Alton Towers, Drayton Manor or Chessington? If you could stretch to it, could she bring a friend along too?

Or perhaps a concert that's age appropriate, or a show or musical?

Is she active? Would she be interested in something like Go-Ape or a canoeing trip? Camping? Cycling?

[stepmummy]

Thank you for your reply.
I think we struggle for free or cheap things to do, as travelling that far and needing to stay in a holiday rental in winter costs so much already :(

Love your ideas though, thank you x

[borninastorm]

perhaps you could spend some time online with her.

teens spend a lot of time online, if you've got a laptop or tablet you could take with you you could spend time with her getting her to show you all the stuff she loves online.

My dd (14) at that age was just beginning to get obsessed with all the YouTubers and she loved to show me their videos.

Or maybe you could go shopping with her and her friends and then that night let dad take her out for a meal (even if its macdonalds).

Then another day dad can take her to the cinema and then all 3 of you go out for food.

I'm suggesting these things rather than special days out cos teens often see through and get 'angry' at forced behaviour. They'd much prefer for you to just be normal with them doing normal things that they normally do, iyswim?

[borninastorm]

I would advise, if you can afford it, to let her bring a friend along to some things.

You can learn so much for teenagers just by spending time with them in the company of their friends. When they're in a group they often feel 'invisible' and will talk about things they'd never dream of actually talking to you about.

It's amazing to get a couple of teenagers in a car and to just listen in to their conversations. It's a real eye opener!!

[yummumto3girls]

As a mum to a 12 nearly 13 year old - shopping!! Even if its to get things like nail varnish and accessories to do her nails! Echo other activity comments but all depends on budget! Nice walks, bike rides (if somewhere to hire them), swimming, baking (choose, shop for and cook a meal, may be a surprise for dad - not so easy in a hotel!) why don't you ask her to make a list!?

[stepmummy]

Thank you so much for all of your replies. Brilliant ideas, thank you xxx