Is this friendship........appropriate ?

[blushingm]

Ds has just turned 11. He goes to a skating club and has taken a shine to one of the coaches daughters - she's just turned 9.

Ds says she's his best friend etc, she's the only friend he's ever wanted to get a birthday card and present for. Ds is a young 11 and she's an older 9 but I'm not sure if their friendship is appropriate given the age difference. What do you think? Or am I over reacting?

[Notmyidea]

I don't see anything wrong with it, but I think I'd want him to identify some friends in his most immediate peer group, too.

[usualsuspect]

I can't see anything wrong with it TBH.

[ELR]

Dd now 10 has been friends with a boy who is 11 for the last year, she's y5 he's y6, he calls for her after school each day, he's been to family parties ect he brought her a gift from holiday, weekends going swimming together. I have been quite happy with it until recently, now suddenly she says he's an idiot and when he calls she refuses to go out.
Yesterday she said at school he was standing next to her and said really loudly to his friends "there's this girl in y5 and everywhere I look she is just there, it's so annoying" dd doesn't seem bothered by this just that is annoying.
It's kind of like a break up without the romance, dd is telling ds who is 7 to not talk to him now too!

[mamadordogne]

I had a friendship just like this, boys especially the sensitive ones find it to talk to girls than boys.

[mamadordogne]

find it easier

[Startail]

DD1s best friend at primary school was a boy a year younger.

They still at 14&13 chatter away like mad if they meet (they are at different schools), but they are definitely simply friends.

Two DCs more into Dr who than, football and Xfactor, who therefore escape together when their peers bore then too much.

[blushingm]

Thank you all!!!

I shall just let them be friends - he has always got on with girls better than boys anyway

[vvviola]

Just to put in my perspective: when I was 9 (well 8, he was at my 9th birthday party), I met an 11-year-old boy on the bus. We have been best friends ever since. He is godfather to my eldest, I'm a reference for his adoption application. We've been through an awful lot together, break ups, deaths of friends.

His poor Dad was convinced for years that he was "letting me get away", and gave him a good talking to once about "hurrying up and getting that girl to marry you". Him being gay might have prevented that to be fair .

So, in my experience anyway, that age gap causes no problems at all