Her friend is self-harming. How do I handle this?

[dragonflygirl]

DD is 12. One of her friends has confided that she has been self-harming with a blade and having online contact with other self-harmers. She says she has never told anyone before and has asked DD not to tell anyone else. DD is so worried about her friend - she told me because she doesn't know what to do. This friend has felt able to trust her and she doesn't want to let her down by betraying her confidence and making her feel even worse. She has tried persuading the friend to tell an adult and offered to go with her but the friend says she doesn't need help even though she feels addicted. I am thinking of this child's parents (I don't know them). I think we must tell someone at the school but don't know how to approach this without causing major upset to my daughter and her friend and inflaming an already fragile situation. Any advice - anyone experienced anything similar? Help.

[amillionyears]

I personally dont know the answer to this, but I do remember a bit similar thread to this about 1 month ago. But the circumstances then were that the children or child was at a boarding school if I remember correctly.

Also worth putting in "self harming" into the search on the top right of your MN screen.
hth

[WakeyCakey]

I remember being in this situation about the same age. It got to the point where my mum drove in the middle of the night to stop my friend from committing suicide.
Her parents didn't have a clue what she was doing in her room.

Likewise DSD is 12 and a boy at her school has already committed suicide (year 7)

I would urge you to tell someone, even if its a teacher who can then keep their eyes out and tell the friends parents.
She may feel betrayed by her parents finding out but surely that is better then the alternative?

[amillionyears]

If you want more opinions and answers op, I would repost in chat. As it is too important an issue, for the thread to be on here, where there is not so much traffic.

[dragonflygirl]

Thanks for the ideas. Have re-posted on chat - didn't think of that - new to all this.