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She just wont eat decent food - what should I do

6 replies

backforhelp · 23/11/2012 09:33

Hi I used to come on MN a few years ago and have just returned as I am really worried about my DD age 11.5 and hoped someone on here might have some advice.

Basically I just cant get her to eat much proper food and I dont know whether the problem is just that she is a stubborn fussy eater; or has an eating disorder or maybe even has some sort of mental health issue. I did try speaking to the school nurse who took her weight etc and said she was underweight - this week I weighed her again and she is worse - now 4ft 11 and weighs 4 st 11lb. Nurse just gave us a whole lot of leaflets about healthy eating. But that was useless - I already know what she SHOULD be eating, I just cant get her to eat it!

For example she simply will not eat breakfast. Just refuses. Also doesnt have much lunch - I recently discovered that the food I was allowing her to take in to school for lunch was mostly being thrown or given away. She does eat sweets - would eat lots of those if I let her - which makes me think it is not anorexia?? At dentist appointment she now needs fillings as pretty much all she eats is sugary stuff. Evening meals she plays with the food, cuts it up and pushes it around and has a few mouthfuls, though she did eat the fries I made last night which again means I have to decide whether to just allow her to eat only bad stuff or watch her refuse to eat anything. Matters are made worse when my other 2 children who would eat the healthy food complain if I let DD eat junk but make them eat good food.

This has been going on a while but seems to be getting worse. Sorry this is so long but I would appreciate any advice.

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mercibucket · 23/11/2012 19:42

Welcome back :)

I wish I knew what to advise but am bumping for the evening crowd. Is she unhappy at school or at home? Has anything happened? I'd be making an appointment with the GP I think, maybe by yourself for the first one to talk it through

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mercibucket · 23/11/2012 19:42

Welcome back :)

I wish I knew what to advise but am bumping for the evening crowd. Is she unhappy at school or at home? Has anything happened? I'd be making an appointment with the GP I think, maybe by yourself for the first one to talk it through

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backforhelp · 23/11/2012 21:22

Thanks for bumping it for me (twice I think!!). This board doesnt seem very active but if anyone out there has been through this do let me know.

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Willowisp · 24/11/2012 23:27

Just thought I would share my DD's weight who at 146 cm is 5st 2lbs, do don't think your dd is too thin.

Where is your Dd getting her money for sweets from ? Can you tasks her money away, only give her a snack for school so she is hungry for a proper tea in the evening ?

Probably not much help, but I'd be inclined to take everything away so her only options are good food at home.

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ripsishere · 25/11/2012 01:04

My DD (11.6) has a shocking food intake too. She will not eat any veg except raw carrot and not much of that. Potatoes must be cooked in oil in some way -roast or chips and she will not eat fruit.
She does eat breakfast, currently musli is favorite, she does occasionally eat toast and eggs, but rarely.
I find that if she prepares her own stuff for lunch (sandwiches are out, she doesn't like bread) she normally eats enough. Mainly it's plain boiled pasta, occasionally some rice and meat.
They are a worry but DD seems healthy enough.

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backforhelp · 26/11/2012 21:36

Hi Willow, thanks for the reply. I think DD is taller than 146cm - she is around 149cm but weighs 5lb less than your DD.
I can tell just by looking to be honest that she is too thin. People have also started to comment on it and clothes are falling off which used to fit. I put her measurements into the BMI calculator on the computer and it comes out at under the 5th percentile (BMI of 13.5) which is too low.

Sweets wise she doesnt have a lot of money nor opportunity but you know how it is with parties, the Xmas fair etc. And being concerned I did think well at least it is some calories so better than nothing. She does have the willpower sadly to just refuse food even if she is hungry, rather than eat something she decides she doesnt want.

Having also spoke to some friends in RL, I am going to see the GP.

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