Did being premature affect your child's development, and how much?

[Callieco]

I'd like to know how much other people's premmies were affected by their birth in relation to hitting developmental milestones. The reason I ask is that DS, although seemingly fine, is definitely behind even his adjusted age peers in gross motor skills. He's 13 actual/11 adjusted months and is only just starting to sit by himself. He's always been strong in his legs, and has pushed up on them from the time he should have been born, or before, but to date he has never rolled over, or crawled, hates being on his tummy still, and as I say is only just beginning to sit unaided, and that is generally with him leaning forwards a bit rather than straight backed. Now that he is starting to do it, I'm relaxing a bit, but I have been quite worried that there might be something undiagnosed wrong. He was born at 31+4 weeks and was on SCBU for five weeks, was on CPAP for 12 days but never fully ventilated, was vag birth, only things wrong were jaundice for a bit and anaemia of prematurity, as the red book puts it! He weighed 4lb2oz.

In terms of other skills, he has always been very vocal (and how!) and his fine motor skills are great. He has no problem picking up food for example, including things like peas, and has done that for quite a long time. The sitting thing has worried me because he tends to keep his head turned to the right more than straight, but medics have assured me everything's ok on that front, although I'm not certain they are right. However, that's probably another issue.

I don't know how much this could be genetic, as I don't know about DP's development milestones because his mum's dead, and his dad is useless at that sort of thing. I was an early walker and talker (walked at 10 months so definitely sitting before that) - but then I'm a girl . My mum said that she doesn't think me or my two sisters ever crawled.

[holsobsessed]

Hi Callieco again
I think prems hit bits of developmental milestones differently and that's the message I have had from various sources (SCBU, HV). My dd (15 months, born small at 3lbs but just needed to put on weight)again seemingly fine is well behind even her adjusted age in terms of fine motor skills - she can't pick up food etc but is good at sitting up and tries to stand as well (in the last two weeks). Interestingly she hates being on her tummy and has shown absolutely no interest in crawling. Similarly I have great concern that something might be undiagnosed - but medics have also tried to reassure me.

[BibiThree]

DTs (almost 7m) aren't reaching their 7m milestones, they're more like 6m, and as they were 5 weeks early, I'm treating them as their adjusted age or I'd just drive myself mad wondering if something was wrong. I know 5 weeks isn't v v prem, but I do see a difference in what they can/can't do and what my dd did at their age.

[VictorianSqualor]

DD was born at 32weeks, apart from weaning her later nothing else really seemed to be behind, she was a slow walker (first steps at 13 months, never crawled)but so are some babies born at 41 weeks, probably just a coincedence.

FWIW, she was on full ventilator for about two weeks, due to a pneumothorax, and also sedated for those two weeks, CPAP for about 4/5 days, weighed 5lb 1.5oz, ad came home after a month, so pretty similar sit to your DS.

[babyjamas]

dd2 -a 27 weeker,weighing 2lb 5oz - now 23 months and seems to be pretty well caught up now. she was late to sit, crawl and walk - even if you adjusted her age - eg she was 20 months before she walked properly - but is fine now - speech is okayish - loads of single words, but doesn't put much together, although she understands everything. Ihave no worries about her long term development. i hve 2 others who were both 31 weekers - now 7 and 11 - both totally caught up by 18 months really.

[WezzleWoo]

DS was 5 weeks early nad spent best part of two weeks in SCBU being tube fed as he was so sleepy and found it difficult to feed.

He's now 5 months and I do see differences in what he can do compared to dds at that age.

He obviously hasn't had that many milestones yet but he smiled much later (about 10 weeks), he's still not great at holding onto things and can't turnover yet...but he's getting there.

Like bibithree I think of him as his adjusted age for most things because it's so easy to worry that something's wrong.

It's also harder when you've got other LOs to compare to, especially if they were fairly quick in their development as both my dds were.

I think the important thing to remember is that they are all individuals developing at their own rate and not to worry if they take a little longer...they will get there in the end.

[littlerach]

Dd1 was born at 34.5 weeks, and was lsightly behind for the first year.

She did have real problems with her speech for years, but I ma spolit as to whether this was prem related. She couldn't really suck when she wa sborn, and subsequesntly the SALT found that many of the sounds she couldn't make, and the faces she couldn't form, such as a pout or kissy face, were using similar muscles. But who knows?!

She is now almost 7 and fine.

[TinkerbellesMum]

I always say that Tink came feet first and hit the ground running. She was a footling breech at 31 weeks and since leaving the hospital she has gone from strength to strength, she isn't behind in anyway other than size and people don't notice how small she is because her personality is so big and she is doing more than what she should.

I think you have to be careful with prem babies because they don't have any set pattern, they could be equal to their age, behind but ahead of their CGA, equal to their CGA, behind their CGA... Try not to compare them to other babies of any age because they more than any baby will do their own thing.

[Lupins71]

Ds was 8 weeks early and is now 10 months 8 months adjusted, hi is sitting and has always been really stong on his legs however he has rolled over but only a couple of times - hates lying on him tummy so in turn is showing no signs of wanting to crawl, I spoke to hv and she said they are all differant and he will do it when he's ready

[Kammy]

I think you also need to look at their personalities! My ds (31+5) was slow to all early milestones, but crawled at 10 months. Then he did not walk for ages, then just got up and did it one day. Likewise speech - I've since learn't that it is his personality to not attempt anything untill there's a good chance of doing it perfectly. Now 6 he is around 2-3 years ahead of his peers in reading and maths skills....
Sounds as if he may be doing things in his own sweet time - my ds had appaling fine motor skills untill he was old enough to play computer games, which helped them improve immeasurably!

[mymatemax]

ds2 (28wks),has mild CP, autism & learning difficulties. Although the definitive diagnosis have emerged over the years (he's 5)the developmental delays were always very obvious.
He never reached any of his early milestones even with adjusted age & has always been a bit of a jumbled up mix developmentally.

It is very common for prem babies to have a slight delay in one particular area without having any long term problems.

As the others have said all babies develop at their own pace, but you have had enough to worry about already, so put your mind at ease & ask for a full assessment if you think it may help.

[shreksmissus]

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[EzrasMummy]

my DS born at 25 weeks. bleed on brain, chronic lung disease, lots of transfutions, ventilated for over a month, heart op at 21 days etc etc. Was just over a pound. crawled at 13 months, walked at 20 months. has slight speech probs and hearing probs but doesnt need a hearing aid.

he took a long time for potty training etc but then boys do! i dont know how much is affected by his prematurity but i never worried. he was strong enough to live and no one knew if he was to have problems. I was just grateful he is alive and well (nearly died many times) and i knew he would do things in his own time so i didnt sweat it. he never ate well and we had to see specialists but hes fine now. one of the brightest in his class. hes also very tall (considering he was even small for a preemie he weighed 5 pounds at 4 months old!).

Considering i was a single parent at the time and went back to work the day before i held him for the first time at 28 days old, i am just grateful that all turned out well.

At the end of the day, these babies made it and their strength and resilience is amazing

[madmumNika]

My DS was a 3lb 30 weeker, spent 8 weeks in SCBU, and will turn 3 in April. Like many of you have said his developmental milestones in the first year-18months were sometimes behind his peers even when correcting his age but from 18 months these became far less noticeable...speech was a little slow but now he talks well for his age, is an agile & very active toddler and growing up incredibly fast (and has overtaken many of his peers in height even though DP & I aren't that tall, although is still on the skinny side). He didn't crawl until just over a year old, then only did it for 2 weeks before deciding he couldn't see enough and wanted to stand up & cruise. He walked 'properly' from 16 months. He didn't cut his first tooth though until 13 months!

I guess what I'm trying to say is that prems only tend to 'even out' with their peers in both size and development around the two-year-old age and to try not to worry too much before then. Like others have said all children vary so so much with their development it's hard to know how much may be related to prematurity. xx

[madmumNika]

PS. Ezrasmummy- your last line is very well put- here, here! When I look at my DS now I can hardly belive how he started out in life.. He sure is a stubborn, determined thing which is maybe why he did so well in spite of his prematurity!! (or maybe he just got that from me )

[BeckyHelen]

My 21mnth old dd was born at 34 weeks and weighed 4lb 7ozs. She has always gained weight fairly well between the 25th and 50th centile, but has never been a really chubby child, and is more slender that she used to be as she is more active.

She has been slower than average meeting physical milestones but has always been fairly forward mentally, she is quite bright.

She never sat unaided til she was about 8 months. Commando crawled when she was about 14mnths (before that she used to shuffle on her back!); never properly crawled until she was 17 mnths an has only just started to walk at the end of 20mnths. But now there is no stopping her and she loves walking, bless her, she is so proud of herself, but not as proud as we are!

At one point we thought she was going to be one of those ultra-late walkers that don't walk until they are 2, but thankfully we don't need to see any doctors because she has made it. Just that bit later than average simply because she was 6 weeks early.

There has never been anything wrong with her speech though and is already saying some things in sentences, and is saying lots of words. It proves to me that preemie children are always that bit slower in certain things and with them this is perfectly normal.

[dizzysteph]

My DD was 8 weeks early and weighed 3lbs 12. Not much wrong as she just needed to put on weight and was in hospital for around 3 weeks.

She also is a bit behind with physical development and didnt sit unaided until around 10 months and at 20 months Im still waiting for her to walk. Im glad I read this topic as I was starting to worry she was a bit too slow. I guess she'll do it when shes ready. Absolutely nothing wrong with her speech though. I got a definate "no" out of her tonight when I offered her a drink!

[Callieco]

Thanks for all the responses. It really helps hearing other people's stories.

[dotvicky]

My LO was 6 weeks early and has a visual impairment too (although we don't know how severe yet).

He was behind in the early days but now that he's around 9-10 months actual age, he doesn't seem too far behind. He's not even vaguely interested in propelling himself anywhere but he sits up very well, he rolls over and grins and interacts as much as his full term 'friend' who was born 5 days before him.

I firmly believe they get where they're going to be when they're going to be there. As long as he doesn't seem too upset about his abilities (or lack thereof), I'm determined not to be myself. He'll have learnt to walk and talk by the time he goes to school.

Vicky
xx

[southeastastra]

ds(6) was born at 37 weeks through c-section cause of placenta previa. he has lots of issues and i wish they just let him stay

[jakethepeg]

My son was born at 27 weeks (1lb 15oz) and had a rough start. He crawled late, walked late, talked especially late due to glue ear but... he is 4 next month and is absolutely perfect.

He can hop, jump, run just as fast/well as his peers, speaks well and speaks a lot! He is intelligent and interested in everything, gets on well at nursery, can do everything his friends can do. I used to compare him to his friends when he was a baby and was behind but to look at him now you wouldn't know he had to fight for his life for so long.

I think it took him a good 2 years to fully catch up with his peers but he sure has caught up now!

He also is extremely stubborn and determined!

[Bewilderbeast]

ds was a 34 plus 2 and very very poorly which we were told may set him back further than the 6 weeks early. He has been slower than his peers with early milestones. He is now 17 months and has been walking independently (although not entirely steadily) for about 6 weeks whereas his friends who were full term were all walking independently at 12 months (mind you they could just be unusually precocious). He is babbling, he is involved, interested and more importantly happy. I have been told that they do catch up eventually so I'm not worried, I'm just pleased that he is actually walking and babbling at all. like jakethepeg's ds my son is also increadibly stubborn and determined, a trait which he has shown since birth

[Kewcumber]

DS was a 2lb 26 weeker and his delays were contributed o by being in an instituaiona for the firstyear of his life so hard to saparate what was prem delay and what was institutional delays.

Hw couldn't sit up without support until nearly 12 months but moved to cruising fairly quickly. Slowish to walk (about 18 months) but his gross and fine motor skills at 2.4 years are excellent. His pssech is slow - lots of single words but not phrases and also some of his words very very unclear. I susoect he may need some SALT but other than that really very few problmes He is a mircle!

[katie7]

My twins were born at 26 weeks and 6 days...but I was hospitalised for 15 days and had the lung treatments. They weighed 1kg. Lavinia is a clumsy child and isn't hugely good with concentration, but that said she is really improving in all areas. Filippo has very mild cerebral palsy, so he needs special shoes and braces because standing and walking are tough with his little feet unable to work properly. He is very bright though and plays really well. Both are getting good with language - we live in Rome and they speak and understand Italian and English which the doctors were worried about but in hindsight we definitely did the right thing. My advice for any parents is to get professional help immediately to stimulate them to their milestones in the first two years. We were helped by Bambino Gesù Hospital and they are fantastic...the see the twins every month and film them to review progress. They need to be stimulated alot but not stressed, a fine line.

[canadianmum]

My dt's were born at 32+5 due to my severe pre-eclampsia. They were 3lb12 and 3lb15 and kept in scbu for 4 weeks, 1 day on cpap.

I adjusted their age until they were about 18 months. They still hit most milestones a bit later than average, didn't walk until 14 months and 16 months corrected for example. I believe they started sitting completely unaided around their first birthday but not much before.

Now they are 5 years old and totally fine. My ds2 is one of the best readers in his class and they are both physically very able, more physically able than many of their peers.

Do you massage your ds at all? That can really help. YOu said he hates being on his tummy but what about lying across your lap (my dd is 6 months and hates tummy time too but she will happily lie across my lap and look around at the floor). Good luck!

[soapbubble]

my little one was born at 36 weeks but was delivered early by c-section due to IUGR. The nurses in SCBU were determined to get her off the feeding tube and to contact breast feed which I perservered with at all costs which resulted in her losing weight and falling off the bottom centile. She then had feeding difficulties for approx 5 months on and off after the 6 weeks spent in SCBU as she definitely wasn't strong enough to suck. When she was eventually put on fortified formula she suddenly woke up to the world and became responsive and active.
She's now 19 months (corrected to about 17.5 months)It has been a total nightmare as she is very far behind her peers. We had a lot of tests done which all came back normal.
I am really wanting to speak to anyone else who may have have been in a similar situation as I am feeling very low. She crawls, pulls herself up on furniture, babbles and can follow simple commands but is clearly very behind.
has anyone else shared anything similar?