When to expect things?

[HoneyMumandSon]

Hi all, DS was born at 33+3 in October. I know milestones etc are put back to adjusted age but what about things like growth spurts? Do they come at actual or adjusted? Everyone I have asked has a different opinion. My main thing at the moment is the 4 month sleep regression, can I expect that to kick in at 4 months adjusted or is what is happening now as bad as it gets?!

[GoatBongosAnonymous]

This isn't going to be particularly helpful... but I have found the idea of adjusted age not very accurate. Mine was born at 31+4 and is now 8 months (six months adjusted). His major growth spurt (so far) he did between 6 and 7:5 months, before this I don't think he had one. But in that six to seven weeks he went from 4.8 kilos to 8.3 and from fitting new-born clothes to needing 6-9 months. Same with sleep regression - happened at the same time as the growth spurt. As for developmental milestones, they are all over the place. He still can't sit independently, roll over front to back, has just learned to stick his tongue out... But is crawling and can pull himself up on us or the furniture. I'm afraid that I think with prems you just have to go with the flow! (Actually I find it quite fun that he has decided to do his own unique thing )

[HoneyMumandSon]

Thanks goats knowing not to expect things helps! Doctors and health visitors all have different opinions (including hv coming at 4 months actual and tutting that DS wasn't doing the right things for 4 months) but noone seems able to help much!

[HoneyMumandSon]

DS is similar - some things he does way ahead but some he lags behind in

[clabsyqueen]

I always use corrected age - with my family, with strangers, doctors etc I just think its not worth the stress of any worry caused by thinking they are 'behind'. As for sleep and growth spurts - I honestly don't know. Sleep for my 28weeker was always terrible - 90minute cycles for months on end. Arghhh

[HoneyMumandSon]

Don't say that. In still desperately hoping the sleep is magically going to fall into place!

[HoneyMumandSon]

Thank you :) we thought we had all bases covered and knew what we needed to got ds1 arriving... Until he turned up do early smug threw is off completely!

[HoneyMumandSon]

Damn auto correct- hope you can decipher!

[ifitsnotanarse]

DS2 was born at 32+1 and after an initial period of not doing much (basically a new born for the first 5 months) eventually began meeting the milestones for his adjusted age.

It's best to refer to the adjusted age and by 1/1.5 yr your DS should have all but caught up.

I worried so much about everything and for nothing. My teeny tiny baby who wouldn't feed and became underweight is now a funny, clever, Tonka toy of a 2.5 year old, who has just learned to bat his eyelashes for bickies, chocolate, and raisins.

[ifitsnotanarse]

BTW, never heard of the four month regression before. What is it?

[GoatBongosAnonymous]

And btw, most hvs think of prems as simply small (and slightly backward) full termers. Best to smile kindly at them and them ignore, otherwise you will spend your life in constant anxiety!

4 month sleep regression is supposed to be the Big One, if - the November crew even named one of their threads after it! well the big one along with the six month, eight month, nine month, continues burbling gently to sleep-deprived self as everyone backs off warily

[GoatBongosAnonymous]

Congratulations miaow ! 7lbs must feel massive Just saw the first pics of Babygoat again and was at how his head tucked into my hand!

[Gurke]

Congratulations Miaow - that's wonderful! Hope you're doing ok & enjoying your not-so-preemie preemie x

[perspective]

I agree, many h/v have no idea and many of their own anxieties regarding prem babies. My h/v drove me to distraction after ds was born (31 weeks). I was pressured to add bottles even though SCBU had worked really hard to help me establish breast feeding, pressured to wean early, was told I might have bonding probs, you name it! She made me feel inadequate.

Really, it is now only 10 years later I see hoe ridiculous it all was. My ds is super fit, runs for an athletics club, plays football for a local team, plays 2 instruments to a high standard and has incredible mathematical abities. I bumped into the h/v in town recently and she asked after ds. When I told her about all his achievements het response was 'well sometimes these little babies do quite well'........ Speechless!

BTW this is also the boy who would not roll over, did not walk until 15 months and didn't speak until he could utter complete sentences. Please don't worry and enjoy your baby!

[HoneyMumandSon]

Thank you all. It's really reassuring to hear everyone's experiences

[MiniPopsMum2012]

I've given up trying to work out what's meant to happen when, and I didn't worry about the sleep regression thing because MiniPop has always been a rubbish sleeper.. .

My little one was born at 30+1 and he just does stuff when he wants too