Buying things for baby?

[S1eepflower]

Hello all!

I'm currently 15 weeks pregnant. I've had scans at 11 and 12 weeks and all was well, and I saw the midwife yesterday and we got to hear the heartbeat for the first time :).

I wanted to start shopping for baby things... only little things at first, clothes, accessories...etc Is it too soon?

All I keep reading about is people waiting until after 20weeks...etc I'm on a very low income and want to spread purchases out over the year. I don't have anything yet and nobody has given me anything.

What's people's thoughts? :)

[siblingrevelryagain]

I'm not superstitious so I bought things. I figured that if I had lost the baby, a few baby clothes and toys would be the least of my concerns.

I believe that God doesn't look down and decide to intervene if you get too cocky and buy a pushchair!

The only considerations for me would be practical. You might not want large boxes if items in your house for months, but equally once you have baby's room set up it's easier to store stuff. My favourite thing when pregnant was folding/re-folding and playing with the clothes I'd bought!

[S1eepflower]

Yep I'm going to wait a while longer for things such as furniture, but clothing, bathing, moses basket...etc I would like to start looking at, if anything just to get me in the baby mood!

I honestly still don't feel like I'm going to be a mum yet. Crazy :)

[Happilymarried155]

I have my 12 week scan next week and plan to start buying bits and pieces, won't be large items until after 20 weeks but it's lovely to start collecting things and it all becoming abit more real! X

[S1eepflower]

Good luck on your 12w scan! :D

[AuntieBrenda]

I'm 23 weeks and it's my second, a girl this time. My parents bought a 2nd hand Moses basket so
I can have one downstairs for the day, I've bought two blankets and some clothes in the next and debenhams sale. My mother has already knitted loads too!
I remember with my son, my dh's aunt going all weird as we had the pram in the house from about 7 mths pg. odd!
Don't worry about it, just start getting what you need as you may be uncomfortable by the end and won't feel like traipsing about. I was last time, I couldn't be bothered to go far from about 8 mths and DS was 9lb 4 and 2 weeks early and I'm small so I was huuuuge. I did a big dump order on amazon at that point for sling, mobile etc.
Good luck to you and congratulations xx

[S1eepflower]

AuntieBrenda - Thanks! I'm also small, only 4ft11, so don't think I'll be wanting to do much walking/waddling about shopping later... I didn't think 15 weeks was too early to start shopping and looking for bargains, taking my time..etc but then I read online loads of people saying nooo wait until after 20wks.. my own fault for looking I guess :)

[Mistyautumn]

I don't think it is too early to buy a few things but my friend, also on a low income, used the money to load some gift cards for places like tesco/asda for clothing, nappies and wipes etc and also high street vouchers for other things. That way she could but what she didn't have nearer the time after she had had some bits and pieces from friends and family later on. Xx

[Mistyautumn]

*buy not but! Stupid fat preggie fingers on the phone!

[S1eepflower]

That's a good plan too, but I don't want to go out and get everything in one go at the end. Want to browse around and just pick up bargains instead of restricting myself to one type of shop :)

[squizita]

Shop around from now. I would neither rush nor put it off for ages.

By 15 weeks it is very unusual for anything to go awry, but the 'a few babygrows would be the least of your worries' thing is wrong.
Been there (earlier) with one of my pregnancy losses and had some maternity clothes. It was traumatic having to get home from the operation and get shot of them. Traumatic.

[S1eepflower]

Well that didn't half put me off... :(

[Redling]

Spreading the cost is very sensible and 15 weeks is not terribly early at all. It's people's personal preference when they want to buy stuff, no one should think you are buying too soon! I wanted to have everything sorted as I was much more worried about stressing myself out trying to buy everything in the third trimester when I was feeling less energetic. And I hate knowing I've got things to get and not getting them! I've also bought shitloads of baby boy clothes although people go 'oh well you only need 6 sleepsuits etc etc' because I want to and it's my bloody baby! But other people will feel differently. It's your pregnancy do what you like!

[S1eepflower]

Haha Redling thanks :) after hearing the heartbeat yesterday I realised I don't feel like a mum, or pregnant, and it was bugging me, I haven't looked online at anything, haven't thought about furniture, prams or even the room (as I will be moving house before the baby is born and I'm moving into a house where I haven't seen the rooms! (partner's family bought it lol)... I thought shopping might get me into it a bit more... it still hasn't dawned on me I'll be a mum in less than 6 months!

[RetroHippy]

A good friend of mine has had the nursery done for months, she had bought several things before she even got pregnant! Her thinking was that at some point she and her partner would have a baby, so it would get used, even if her current pregnancy didn't go to plan.

I also know someone who bought very little and left all the tags on in case she had to return it.

I'm going for happy medium! 14 weeks now and I've been given some clothes by a very kind friend and got a few bits of maternity wear. I'm hoping to have the nursery done by the end of the summer just because it will be easier to do it now whilst I have the time. Purely logistics! Mum was knitting the day after I told her at 5 weeks. I'm not superstitious, I just know that there's a lot of shopping time left! may buy some muslins next time I go to the supermarket

[lithiumfear]

Losing a baby at any stage is traumatic, but arguably far more so the later in pregnancy you get.

That said you can't hold off 'in case' things go wrong, they can - and do, but what you have bought is not going to affect things either way.

Superstition is a way of trying to control the uncontrollable - but life isn't controllable.

For what it's worth, as has been said, if the worst did happen, then in a way having a house set up ready for baby would be sad, but would also validate it, the child exists already x

[S1eepflower]

I'm already in maternity wear, that's the only things I have bought. 4ft 11 and a size 14 I'm now a 16 and growing fast.... my hips and tummy just seem to be expanding so fast... and it's not the extra chocolate bars and pies I promise ;)

I don't think I'll keep tags on things.... :/ Think I'll go with your first friend's thinking, that I will be having a baby no matter what so it's worth keeping. Don't think If i had a mc I could see myself going to shops for refunds :/

[Fairywhitebear]

Personally I'd wait until at least the 20 week scan.

We lost our first at 17 weeks. Agree with poster above. It was very traumatic coming home and dealing with all of the baby stuff I had bought.

Mind you, as someone who has had a loss, I also know that you can lose the baby at any point. With my third pg I bought literally nothing until the baby was actually here.

Totally up to you of course, but I wouldn't be taking any tags off things and I'd be storing purchases elsewhere. Sorry.

[Redling]

Having a few little things to look at in a drawer is lovely and it really did make me feel like baby was coming one day! I got a Sophie the Giraffe, a little newborn clothes set (generic animals as it was before the 20 week scan and we didn't know then if boy or girl) and a couple of little toys. It was nice to start the baby drawer. The vast majority of women have complication free pregnancys and you are well into your pregnancy at 15 weeks, enjoy it!

[Redling]

That wasn't a response to you Fairywhitebear, I was posting at the same time, don't want my post to look like I was purposely contradicting you.

[loaderloader]

Sleepflower, don't be put off, everyone has different experiences. For me one of the happiest days of my pregnancy was buying the outfit I intended to bring baby home in. I bought it when I was 15 weeks, my first purchase, and often got it out when pregnant to have a special soppy moment thinking of my baby.

Turned out it was a bit big for him initially but its still very cute on!

After that I bought lots of sale bargains throughout pregnancy ...and I could still have done with buying more.

Baby shopping is great fun. Enjoy.

[ArcheryAnnie]

It's very tempting to buy lots of stuff now, but you'd be amazed at how little a newborn needs. We were given some babygros, my work gave me a ton of nappies as part of my leaving present, and my then-partner bought a moses basket and half-a-dozen moses sheets the day after DS was born, when we were still in hospital.

Most of the basic stuff will still be at the same price, whenever you buy it. And don't, whatever you do, be tempted to buy toys or teddies until well after the birth, as you don't know how many you will be given!

[Redling]

Having a few little things to look at in a drawer is lovely and it really did make me feel like baby was coming one day! I got a Sophie the Giraffe, a little newborn clothes set (generic animals as it was before the 20 week scan and we didn't know then if boy or girl) and a couple of little toys. It was nice to start the baby drawer. The vast majority of women have complication free pregnancys and you are well into your pregnancy at 15 weeks, enjoy it!

[lithiumfear]

But Fairy 4000 babies are lost in the last trimester each year, so waiting till the baby is due is just delaying things.

I bought quite early with DS & DD1, so had everything I needed for DD2. I went full-term & returned home with empty arms & full, leaking breasts.

I was glad to have bought some nice things for DD2 before she was born. I was physically, as well as emotionally, unable to go shopping for her burial outfit, so was glad to have a lovely outfit ready.

[ArcheryAnnie]

Oh god, lithiumfear.

[S1eepflower]

I think some people seem to think I'm going to go on a shopping spree despite me mentioning my very low income (the point of me buying small amounts each month) I don't intend to buy hundreds of "cute" outfits or anything other than necessities, but just things to make me feel the pregnancy is real, not toys, cribs and wardrobes..etc.

Lithiumfear your story is so touching... I'm so sorry for your loss, and it seems already having the outfit was a good choice for you hugs

It seems only the people who have had mcs are telling me to wait... but only in hindsight, as they all bought things too.

Think I've made the decision I'm definitely going to buy a few things this weekend. Not buying things in the worry that my baby won't be born makes me feel like I'm not acknowledging it or enjoying my pregnancy... just how I feel.

Thanks everyone for your advice :)