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Pregnant (IVF) Worriers (part two)

(1000 Posts)

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others! We have filled our first thread (http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1721178-Pregnant-IVF-Worriers) but there is more worrying to do so here we are.

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

Dear lord above! I've just looked that up. Is it really ok to do that to yourself during pregnancy? Or ever really.

vallinnapod Tue 13-Aug-13 15:13:10

I feel like a sales woman today. I was very worried about tearing. I got an Epi-No. Very expensive but then to me it was worth every penny not to even have a minor tear (just 'grazing') and no stitches.

Oh and Sweetie I'm pondering...

I bought a Grobag swaddle wrap this time and used it when she was too small for a sleeping bag. I also used it again when the weather got very hot. I keep a blanket in the lounge for feeds, one upstairs in the cot in case it's cold, one in the car / pram and there's usually one in the wash. They are just cellular cotton ones and easy to wash and dry.

dildals, really glad the tests were clear. Hope you settle down to whatever counts as normal just now. Sweating sounds grotty for you, I don't get that now but used to feel more sweaty when pregnant and have a shower before going to bed. It's all hormonal presumably.

shazza, I know this sounds stupid but what bit of tearing are you worried about? Is it the pain at the time or the recovery? I just wonder if anyone can reassure you.

SweetieTime Tue 13-Aug-13 14:11:57

Expat they rack up DH cc bill grin

ExpatAl Tue 13-Aug-13 14:10:32

Good to know. I like their fairaisle blankets too. All their stuff actually.

Sweetie, my impulse buying is racking up the cc bill. Dread to think what twins would do to it!

vallinnapod Tue 13-Aug-13 14:07:33

It was, they are fantastic. DS had a 0-6 and then 6-12. As a little baby they are fab as there are no fastenings or tight arm/leg holes. As a larger baby they are great as it keeps their hand and heads warm, without having hats and mitts to pull off. I get everyone I know having a baby one!!

SweetieTime Tue 13-Aug-13 13:58:20

Expat they are just the cutest thing, I think I might have to get a couple of these too. They might be the baby equivalent of the MN scarf.

ExpatAl Tue 13-Aug-13 12:56:04

Was it this Vallinna http://tuppenceandcrumble.com/shop/fleece-baby-star-wrap-brights? I bought one yesterday. Couldn't resist it - it looked so cuddly.

vallinnapod Tue 13-Aug-13 12:36:23

Dildal - Bella looks fantastic in her little piccie! I am so sorry about the setback but it sounds like she has rallied. A bit hmm at your friend's book offer but I can see that their heart would be in the right place. I had worse sweats when PG but I do remember waking up and wondering if my bed was soaked with sweat or milk blush - a delight!

MrsHY - glad you have a wriggler. Can't wait for that stage again!

Buzzy has your cat forgiven you yet? Mine used to ignore me for at least a day after a catbox experience grin

Gin my DH is a Southern Softy smile We were both hmm about NCT. Didn't subject him to hypnobirth but have talked him into a HB this time.

Mariana - I like to see you pitch the grooming service to Dragons Den wink I get a regular wax so just continue. Nails-wise I just contorted myself with bump between legs!

Sweetie - fab 20 week scan news!!

Nokkie - I LOVE the Yoni Warriors!! And all the perineal YouTubing.

ExPat - I had two blankets, one for the pram, one for the cot. Never used the cot one (swaddled, then sleep sacks) and rarely used the pram one (had an awesome fleece star fish!)

AFM - still relatively symptom free. Booked a private scan for Saturday (9 weeks)

Yoni love to all wink

ExpatAl Tue 13-Aug-13 10:33:45

x posted. Very happy to hear the tests came back clear. Brilliant.

ExpatAl Tue 13-Aug-13 10:32:41

My DH is from deepest darkest North but he was all over the NCT course and peed me off by being way more adept at changing nappies than me. I saw Weleda perineal massage oil yesterday and considered it as I'm still secretly hoping for a VBAC, but chickened out of presenting it to the male sales assistant. What a wuss.

Shazza, I went through a phase of feeling as if my bladder was being plucked like a harp but now the big head moves on and off it constantly humiliation is always just seconds away. I can barely feel my pelvic floor muscles now but hope that they can hang on for another couple of weeks.

Sweetie, lovely news.

Mariana, your list is brilliant!

Hello to everyone else - hope you're all doing well. Nothing much going on with me. I'm just getting last minute bits and pieces. It's cheaper to order baby furniture and clothes/blankets from John Lewis and have it delivered which shows how ridiculously expensive Belgium is. Btw, those with kids already, how many blankets did you get? Do you think it's worth getting swaddling blankets?

Dildals Tue 13-Aug-13 10:31:22

Yes it's the first time she's been sick and indeed they stop the feeds because they don't want her to breathe it in, but also because there's something called, wait for it, necrotising enterocolitis (just in case you are ever stuck at scrabble) that they are quite scared of. So they take no chances, stop feeds, and do bloods & a scan to check for inflammation. Both came back clear so it's looking like it was just all a bit too much for her. Maybe it was the Chinese takeaway I had.

I'll do the FB group no worries. The nighttime expressing sessions are boring me to death. I have started watching TED talks, that's quite good.

On another note, I was already prewarned about this but I am sweating like a [fill in appropriate comparison] ... especially in the night. I get out of bed smelling like a farm animal. DH has already commented that the wasps in the garden seem to drop dead because of my BO!! All it takes is a shower to fix it of course, but it just makes me feel so grotty!

Oops sorry girls. Bloody app. X

Morning girls

Dildals I'm sorry about sweet bella. Poor little thing. How distressing for you all. I hope she is more settled today. Is that the first time she has been sick? At least she is feeding again. Maybe it was just abit much for her. It was thoughtful of your friend to send the book but maybe not completely appropriate for you at this time. I can't imagine what it feels like to lose a child but I think that crisps put it very well when she said that you are in a surreal situation where you have experienced an indescribably deep profound loss whilst at the same time experiencing exhilarating joy. If the book is helpful then dip into it later but for now you can't rush these things. Do whatever you need to do. Loads of love for you all today.

Ceara another Yorkshireman DP over here. But he is an artist so maybe that helps being good with his hands wink Thanks for the bravissimo tip. I'd forgotten about the covent garden one. I'll go after work. I don't think it's too soon for mat clothes. Just leave abit of room for growth. Re exercise can you do something really gentle like a walk or Pilates. I got a great DVD from amazon called 10 minute Pilates solutions. It's easy to find just 10 mins to do a few stretches. I do 2 of the routines every mornjng. I was really pleased the other day cause DP commented that my body looked strong and healthy so maybe those 20 mins each day have paid off.

Sweetie congrats on the scan. A boy and a girl how exciting. Re NCT are they getting you to do it early cause its twins? We start ours on the 7th sept. I was also in 2 minds about it but DP wanted to do it (on SILs advice. He'll do anything SHE says). Anyway I'm pleased cause gin is doing the same class so I've already got my NCT friend grin

MrsH we are doing our Hypno practice. I dont like the tickling and prefer firmer strokes. Yes I saw the Bbc report. That fits with the Hypno theories nicely.

I'm 3 days into the p massage. I haven't got the hang of if yet. I'll check out the video buzzy. I'm so scared shitless about tearing that I'm willing to keep persevering. I said that I was going to bed last night while DP was watching a film with his parents. He said do you want me to come and help and made a hand gesture. It took me a while to get what he was referring to. In front of his parents! I said thanks but I had that covered for this evening!

I wonder if any of us will have a boy? Well maybe sweetie now. With all these girls being born its no wonder that dating sites are over run with woman trying to find a man. smile

Noks love the random FB name. Go for it dildals. Are you sure it's ok for you to do? I'll post a pic of my new lounge if buzzy posts a pic of her new windows grin

I totally get the excited nesting and doing up the house buzzy. I'm going to rent out my parents as a new post baby business venture. You'll see me in dragons den with my mum in her painting dungerees!

The inlaws go home today leaving a sparkling white lounge. I love it. They have worked so hard. Only 3 more rooms to go. I'm going to get the estate agents round when it's finished while it all looks good. Before shazlett comes and trashes it.

Oh one last thing. Yesterday I was talking to my boss and shazlett gave me a sharp kick in what felt like my bladder. I yelped and thought I was going to pee my pants there and then. I squeezed with all my might so thank goodness I've been practising the pelvic floor exercises. blush

And on that note...... Xx

Morning girls

Dildals I'm sorry about sweet bella. Poor little thing. How distressing for you all. I hope she is more settled today. Is that the first time she has been sick? At least she is feeding again. Maybe it was just abit much for her. It was thoughtful of your friend to send the book but maybe not completely appropriate for you at this time. I can't imagine what it feels like to lose a child but I think that crisps put it very well when she said that you are in a surreal situation where you have experienced an indescribably deep profound loss whilst at the same time experiencing exhilarating joy. If the book is helpful then dip into it later but for now you can't rush these things. Do whatever you need to do. Loads of love for you all today.

Ceara another Yorkshireman DP over here. But he is an artist so maybe that helps being good with his hands wink Thanks for the bravissimo tip. I'd forgotten about the covent garden one. I'll go after work. I don't think it's too soon for mat clothes. Just leave abit of room for growth. Re exercise can you do something really gentle like a walk or Pilates. I got a great DVD from amazon called 10 minute Pilates solutions. It's easy to find just 10 mins to do a few stretches. I do 2 of the routines every mornjng. I was really pleased the other day cause DP commented that my body looked strong and healthy so maybe those 20 mins each day have paid off.

Sweetie congrats on the scan. A boy and a girl how exciting. Re NCT are they getting you to do it early cause its twins? We start ours on the 7th sept. I was also in 2 minds about it but DP wanted to do it (on SILs advice. He'll do anything SHE says). Anyway I'm pleased cause gin is doing the same class so I've already got my NCT friend grin

MrsH we are doing our Hypno practice. I dont like the tickling and prefer firmer strokes. Yes I saw the Bbc report. That fits with the Hypno theories nicely.

I'm 3 days into the p massage. I haven't got the hang of if yet. I'll check out the video buzzy. I'm so scared shitless about tearing that I'm willing to keep persevering. I said that I was going to bed last night while DP was watching a film with his parents. He said do you want me to come and help and made a hand gesture. It took me a while to get what he was referring to. In front of his parents! I said thanks but I had that covered for this evening!

I wonder if any of us will have a boy? Well maybe sweetie now. With all these girls being born its no wonder that dating sites are over run with woman trying to find a man. smile

Noks love the random FB name. Go for it dildals. Are you sure it's ok for you to do? I'll post a pic of my new lounge if buzzy posts a pic of her new windows grin

I totally get the excited nesting and doing up the house buzzy. I'm going to rent out my parents as a new post baby business venture. You'll see me in dragons den with my mum in her painting dungerees!

The inlaws go home today leaving a sparkling white lounge. I love it. They have worked so hard. Only 3 more rooms to go. I'm going to get the estate agents round when it's finished while it all looks good. Before shazlett comes and trashes it.

Oh one last thing. Yesterday I was talking to my boss and shazlett gave me a sharp kick in what felt like my bladder. I yelped and thought I was going to pee my pants there and then. I squeezed with all my might so thank goodness I've been practising the pelvic floor exercises. blush

And on that note...... Xx

Dildals, poor Bella and poor you and DH. I'm assuming that they don't want her vomiting in case she breathes it in so better to stop her feeds for a little while? Surely the fact that she's been feeding really well means that she can manage a short time without, but I think interrogating the staff is good and I hope they can reassure you both. Easier said than done, I know.

I bet it's the splint that's annoying her, I hope it's not needed for long and she's soon back to her usual feeding. It's awful not to feel you can comfort her but even hearing your voice and knowing you're there will be comforting to her.

I think your friend meant well but now is not really the time. I imagine you're swept along by attending to Bella's needs and don't have much time to reflect on what has happened. This is why it must be so hard dealing with losing one twin. You've got such a lot to deal with and it must often feel overwhelming.

I hope today is better though and that the other mums can help reassure you too.

ExpatAl Tue 13-Aug-13 08:04:32

Bella sounds as if she's showing her personality already Dildals. No rest for you I think! So sorry you're going through this. It's shitty to have to rely on experts to tell you how worried you should be and see your tiny girl put through so much. It seems really positive that she's taking a feed every hour now but the set back sounds awful.
Do you know about Bliss? www.bliss.org.uk/. They were a lifesaver for me - it makes a huge difference to talk to people who really truly know what it's like.

Dildals Tue 13-Aug-13 02:18:08

Bella had her first little setback yesterday. She had a v full tummy and she had thrown up some of my milk. So as a precaution they decided to stop her feeds for 24hrs. I am writing this down as if this is absolutely normal, which for baby doctors it probably is. For anxious parents however it was quite a shock. She was doing so well and then to have her feeds stopped .. Also, we didn't know where to peg this, is this a 2/10 on the badness scale or 5/10 or 8/10? After speaking to / interrogating staff for 4hrs we got more comfortable on the issue. They re-started her feeds again today with 3.5ml an hr. I found and find the whole thing still quite distressing. They had to put a cannula in her tiny arm again (to put a drip in to keep her hydrated), and they put it in a bit of a weird spot on her arm, causing her to have a splint to keep her arm straight. She doesn't like it one bit and keeps wriggling out of it, only for the nurses to straitjacket her back in to the splint. The whole day she was fidgety, yelping and crying. No thing I did would settle her. I don't know whether she's hungry or has a painful tummy or just annoyed with the splint. She's got such a little cry on and my heart goes to pieces every time she cries. I hope dearly she's feeling a bit better tomorrow because I don't think I can handle seeing her upset for another day. Such a horrible feeling not being able to soothe your child. The other mums told me the first setback is always the hardest ... pff ... tell me about it! I have started to keep a little diary. I think that helps. A friend of mine lost her baby a couple of months after birth and she sent me this book 'Empty cradle, broken heart' ... errr OK ... might be really useful but at the moment not quite sure what to make of it!

Are we all happy with The Yoni Warriors?

I have ordered The Fall DVD on Amazon to keep me entertained while expressing, so boring!

Nokkie73 Mon 12-Aug-13 22:34:56

buzz tell it to the Judge wink

Nokkie73 Mon 12-Aug-13 22:33:37

gin and vall and buzz fab news on the scans by the way. And great to hear another one for Team Pink, gin

dildals how is Bella today ?

Hi to everyone else.

Noks x

Buzzybee123 Mon 12-Aug-13 22:29:11

hey it was shazza who started it, I was just getting informed via good ole utube, I quite like the name

Nokkie73 Mon 12-Aug-13 22:25:15

Got our Facebook name.....

The Yoni Warriors

I took my inspiration from buzz who has been watching YouTube porn grin

sweetie congrats on the scan. Glad to hear the twinnies are doing well.

I am only half joking about the FB group name by the way. If anyone else has some more sensible ideas, please feel free to suggest them. Xx

Don't make me look that up...

No.

Excellent scan news Sweetie, really pleased for you. A girl and a boy are easier to think of names for than two of the same sex. By all means send me some that you like and I'll mull it over.

Buzzybee123 Mon 12-Aug-13 20:23:17

shock shock shock just watched a pernineal massage on utube, I am so going to show Barry grin

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