Ds refusing to admit he needs a wee and my temper

[lecce]

It has been a long hard struggle potty-training DS3.3. In retrospect we started before he was ready at 2.10, he will use a potty for wees but never asks for the potty and until recently, never showed any physical awareness.

He has got better in that he shows awareness that he needs to go - he looks uncomfortable, shuffles about a bit and sometimes says, 'I'm cold,' and this means he needs a wee. However, he has never taken himself to the potty or asked to be taken. Moreover, whenever we suggest it he is adamant that he doesn't want to go. He usually starts screaming and crying and will lash out, not hard but it's extremely annoying, especially as I know he does want to go and he pretty much always wees once we finally get there.

I am so fed up with this and I have ds11mths to get upstairs as well as he cannot be trusted downstairs alone. It is such a struggle to try and get them both up the stais with ds1 screaming and hitting that I lost it with him today and shouted really loudly at him. He was so upset and so was I, it was horrible.

He did a wee though and if I hadn't insisted he come up it would have been on the sofa. I would be tempted to go back to nappies for a bit but he asks for pants now. Why won't he just admit he needs to go??

Oddly, he will wee outside as soon as asked as long as I draw him a 'magic' circle in the mud/sand or give him a 'special' leaf to wee on. However, I don't want to make him reliant on going outside to wee for obvious reasons!

[Furball]

My ds was like this and it's so frustrating when they are so sure they definately don't want to go, then within 3 minutes there's been an accident.

What about a sticker chart? you get a sticker for everytime you go and if you go on your own, you get an extra big sticker.

I started saying 'I bet I can do a wee before you' and rush off to the toilet. His competative side kicked in and he'd rush to do one too.

[skidoodly]

Won't solve the problem, but surely life would be easier for all 3 of you if you kept a potty downstairs?