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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Lifting - I've got night training all wrong haven't I

11 replies

fruitstick · 18/05/2010 13:14

A little background.

DS1 was potty trained at 2.5 but didn't take pull ups off at night as we were moving house and new baby and thought he would regress. A year later his night nappies were still sodden so I decided to take them away regardless as felt DS was just not bothering to get up.

That was a few months ago. He seemed absolutely fine, mostly dry nights, the odd accident etc. Someone suggested that I wake him up to take him to the loo before I go to bed to avoid accidents altogether.

However it seems to have made things worse. Recently he has been wetting the bed far more frequently. Last night it was twice and he seemd to be fast asleep both times.

Has lifting meant that he's stopped being able to hold it in? should I stop?

I don't want to have to go back to pull ups as he would be upset.

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ticklebug74 · 18/05/2010 13:38

Have no constructive help for you I am sorry but just wanted to say that I used to lift DD1 too and then read somewhere that this can ultimately lead to them being trained to need the loo at that time so I stopped. We do make DD1 go to the toilet before and after her bath and she has nothing to drink at all after dinner except a sip of water when brushing her teeth. DD1 has only ever had a couple of night time accidents and they have always been when something stressful has happened so might your DS1 be upset about something? Good luck.

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Iklboo · 18/05/2010 13:40

DS slipped back a little recently. We've reverted to reward chart - dry night = sticker, 5 stickers = Bakugan toy (or Battle Gang as he calls it, which is a much better name IMHO)

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ruddynorah · 18/05/2010 13:40

i thought you couldn't train for dry nights as such. it's a chemical thing isn't it? they either are dry or not. you can only really encourage them to go to the loo before bed. not much else. you aren't even supposed to limit drinks etc. in fact they say to give more drinks so they get used to having a full bladder to improve control.

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nigglewiggle · 18/05/2010 13:43

Children need to produce a hormone which stops their body producing urine at night. They also need to develop the ability to wake themselves if they do need to urinate. you cannot speed up the development of either of these things so I would not bother lifting and would stop stressing about it.

How old is he? It is worth knowing that medical professionals will not think anything of it until they are over 7.

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nigglewiggle · 18/05/2010 13:45

I re-read your post and I gather he is 3.5 - I really wouldn't think anything of it for a couple of years.

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fruitstick · 18/05/2010 13:48

He is 4 now.

I am also aware that I wet the bed until I was quite old (past 7) and was taken to the doctors. So I'm not too worried about him wetting or not wetting. More what to do.

To lift, not to lift, to bring back the pullups?

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ConnorTraceptive · 18/05/2010 13:58

Don't lift no point.

Take him out of pull ups for a week and see how you get on. With ds we gave no drinks after 6pm and made sure he went to the toilet before bed.

You can't train children to be dry at night so if he's still wetting perhaps go back to pull ups.

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thehairybabysmum · 18/05/2010 14:03

I would say stop the lifting then.

If you dont want o go back to nappies (understandably IMO), then have you tried those bed-mat things? They will at least make your life easier until he gets back on track.

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belgo · 18/05/2010 14:06

Stop the lifting. It sounds like it could be disturbing his sleeping patterns meaning that his sleep is heavier later on in the night.

I lifted dd1 for about 6 months and had no problems; she was dry at night very quickly. But if it's not working for your ds then stop.

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Sidge · 18/05/2010 14:39

Lifting doesn't promote night time dryness as one, it reinforces the 'wee whilst you're asleep' message that the brain is getting, and two, by emptying the bladder during the night you aren't allowing it to get used to being fuller and stretched for longer periods. It is necessary to allow the bladder to learn to get bigger and fuller as it increases the capacity, and also sends a stronger 'wake up' message to the brain when it does need to be emptied.

You can sort of train for dry nights ruddynorah, what you do is work within the child's capabilities depending on their age, bladder capacity, levels of vasopressin, level of arousability etc. It takes a careful assessment of all those things to work out where the child is at, and promote dryness but I certainly wouldn't do much with a 4 year old!

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ches · 31/05/2010 02:29

Lifting works in this house. He wakes up himself at least half the time, so we're working towards him ultimately being able to get up on his own to wee in the night. I remember always doing so as a child (and teen and adult). He usually goes through fine until morning if he gets up or is lifted around midnight. When lifting, we turn the light on and wake him up, always ask if he needs to wee and don't put him on until he says yes. It's putting them on asleep that's troublesome.

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