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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

DS doesn't want to but I want him to. Selfish mummy question.

5 replies

Purplelooby · 08/07/2014 13:09

DS (22 mo) is ready to PT by all of the standard markers, more so in fact; now and then I've been doing the leave-nappy-off thing and he was just hopping on the potty himself for a poo and asking to be put on sometimes for a wee. More recently he's gained bladder control (goes an hour or two between wees) so all should be fine. Except he doesn't really seem to want to and is no longer telling me when he needs the toilet, or when he does he backtracks. If I ask him whether he wants to use the potty he immediately says no.

Obviously what I SHOULD do is wait until he wants to, but this is the thing... over summer he is off from the childminder and since I'm still on mat leave with DD, we can have plenty of time in the house and garden to dedicate to PT. Even better, DH can take a couple of weeks off too to help out with DD so that I can concentrate on DS. DH starts a new job in Sept and will be commuting 2 hours each way so I'll be pretty much on my own from getting up until bedtime after that. DS will also be back at the childminders and some new children are starting so his life will all be changing. In fact I can't ever see another opportunity like this presenting itself. Am I being stupid to even try or will he get into it once we get cracking. I've bought Pirate Pete's potty adventure and apparently he got on the potty at the childminders and said 'wee wee' the day after we started reading it.

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TarkaTheOtter · 08/07/2014 13:11

Give it a go. Try for two weeks, if it doesn't work wait a month.

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runningonwillpower · 08/07/2014 13:20

My daughter expressed an interest in the potty around the same age. Turned out it was just a game that she quickly lost interest in. She wasn't really ready.

A wise woman once said to me, 'Potty train at 2 dry by 3. Potty train at 3 dry by 3'. For sure, there are some children who sort it out more quickly but it's best if it's child-led.

A pre-conceived timetable might just backfire. By all means leave the potty around and let him use it if he wants to but otherwise, I'd wait.

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catkind · 08/07/2014 23:46

Will he willingly go on the toilet/potty if you tell him it's time for a check rather than asking? If so I'd be inclined to give it a shot and see what happens. Might help to just take him often enough to stay dry for a couple of days to break the nappy-using habit. Worked very easily for DD at just over 2 when she was like your DS showing she could do it but not consistently actually doing it.

I wouldn't make a fight of it if he doesn't want to use the toilet at all though. Could set up negative associations.

DS always at any age said no when asked if he needed the toilet. At 3 it would be swiftly followed by an accident - at least now at 5 he does backtrack and take himself! My mantra became "tell, don't ask".

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MagratGarlik · 08/07/2014 23:52

Have you tried good old fashioned bribery? DS1 was trained within a week by buying Thomas the Tank Engine pants which he could only wear if he kept them dry. DS2 was trained in 3 days (admittedly reluctant and late to be trained). He only decided he wanted to do it when I told him he couldn't go to his friend's house to play until he used the toilet.

Basically make being trained more appealing than not being and half your battle is won.

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Purplelooby · 09/07/2014 21:37

There's been biscuits! Yeah he will sit on for a bit so long as I've got books or something to distract him. Or bribery works well with him. Where can I get these fantastic pants by the way? So far in Asda and Saino's I can only find spiderman and Hello Kitty. DS is obsessed with Hello Kitty but they were frilly... I'm not into gender stereotypes and have no problems with him having girls pants, but frills seemed a bit much!

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