visitors after birth

[Katy85]

Need some advice from anyone who may have experienced anything similar. Had a traumatic birth with little one (forceps/ventous/bad tear etc) and to top that off little one was whisked off to intensive care immediately and was there for a week before we could take him home. Finally got him home two days ago (this is day 3) and my partner is inviting his family round to visit without asking me. We had visitors on the day we brought little one home, visitors twice on day two and just caught him inviting day one visitors round again today. I said I didn't want visitors and would like some quiet time just the three of us for a couple of days, his answer was that I could just go upstairs when people come round! My own mother has given us breathing space and has asked to visit at the weekend which is fine and respectful but I don't know what to do about my partner inviting his family without asking me, he's very close with his family but I want time alone with my new family, baby blues are kicking in and I usually have a good cry in the evening plus my milk is coming in fast so my boobs are very sore etc.

[expatinscotland]

Tell him NO.

[expatinscotland]

Get the midwife on board, too.

[Countmyblessings]

Just calmly let him know how you are feeling after the trauma your body has gone through and how your feeling emotionally he needs to understand being social is the last thing you want and explain the baby is not going anywhere and you just need some breathing space!
I don't know what it is about men they do this and you just want to kill them!!!! ( which is totally understandable)
You don't want people to come around a pick up the vibe of you not being happy!!!!
And when they come around they want to stay and you need to rest! Explain it clearly and maybe make a date for everyone to come around get it over and hopefully they will respect your privacy!
Good luck!!!!!

[HelenHen]

Yep tell him no! We had this with first and I ended up hiding and crying in my room a few times! This time I spoke to dh beforehand and he agreed! We had no visitors for a few days and only when I was ready and it was so lovely and relaxed, plenty of bonding!

Please just tell him no and that it's unacceptable!