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FEB 2010 Two and a half to three...the "contrary age" (no it isn't! yes it is!)

(989 Posts)

Come in, sit down, fresh coffee is brewing, Prosecco's in the fridge for later and there's a bumper box of Lindt chocolates for all....

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Thu 17-Jan-13 23:31:55

Happy birthday mous's DD1.

Sorry about the cross post Stoof. Hope the appointment went well.

SC liking the dancing description!

IC bathtime seemed to change as the baby developed. I think I used to bath baby first so he was tired and then lie him on the mat in a vest while DS1 had a paddle. Once DS2 became mobile it had to all change again (and was harder in many respects due to the hard furniture and floor in a bathroom for potential accidents) Even now I don't relish bathtime on my own - mainly due to fighting over toys and the fact that it is the end of a long day! And, believe me, when DH went away for 3 nights when DS2 was 6 months old (and a 20x a day vomiting machine!), I was evil for days beforehand and would have paid him anything not to have gone. Nearly 2.5 years later, it's a very different prospect.

The skiing was kind of my idea - I'm just not so daunted by the thought of solo childcare at the moment. It now looks like they can only manage a long weekend date-wise. There was talk about delaying until next year, but we may be having an op on DS1's scar then so I've said I think they should just go now while we know they can, even if it's for fewer days. Our lives are just too unpredictable to put off sizeable treats for that long! If I lose my job, he certainly won't be spending money on a skiing trip!

SconesForTea Sat 19-Jan-13 09:58:27

Might you lose your job survival? sad

Good for you being so magnanimous about the skiing trip. I just don't think I have it in me to let DH swan off with his mates unless it's a stag do (and then it's with very bad grace, and my mum to stay to hold my hand!). I must have double standards, as I was due to go to Poland this summer for a few days for my stepbrother's wedding. Sadly it's off (although sad for him, I am glad I don't have to go).

I used to find solo bedtime very stressful as DD2 was so tired she'd cry if put down or if I attended to DD1. At that age i'd stick DD1 in front of a DVD, nip up and do DD2 without bath, then do DD1 normal routine with bath. Now, I can do them both at the same time.

I am hiding upstairs in my freezing bedroom. I am supposed to be having a lie in but DH brought DD1 into bed at 6am, then DD2 in for a feed when she woke, and now all I can hear is DD1 tantrumming and screaming downstairs. I don't want to have to go down and mother!

Glad the funeral went well CP.

DD1's behaviour seems to have taken a turn for the worse recently. She is just sooo contrary. It drives me mad.

Who has snow??? We have a dusting, nothing like the dumps of recent years. It is COLD though (with apologies to Mous who really knows what cold feels like).

Ah here they come

Thanks for the bath-time thoughts!!

So, the continuing eczema saga....after the third night in a week where I got virtually no sleep after 03.30 thanks to the head-bothering/itching, I went back to the local surgery and a different GP. She was the one who put me on to Medised and related toddler sedative medicines, so I was fairly confident she'd hit us with the hard stuff. And so she did. We now have hc cream, anti-histamine drops, Aveeno and Balneum for the bath. Result was a better night last night and I'm now feeling more confident that we can clear up the eczema, at least for the time being. Meanwhile, I'm off all dairy to see if that makes any difference too. We shall see!

DD is loving the snow! She's built three snowmen with DH already and we got one of those little plastic sleds to tow her about in - or let her tow the shopping in. Big hit!! DS now so keen on being in a snowsuit, but seems to enjoy being out and about once he's been bundled up.

Happy birthday to your DD1, Mous!

Climbingpenguin Sat 19-Jan-13 16:05:31

good IC

we are also mid flare up, his whole face, neck and head. He also is sporting a big gash from the bedside drawers on his forehead along with a good sized bump and a few bruises. I've some interesting comments from people who run groups this week.

bc I did write a long post for you but fb wouldn't upload it, will try and do it again later.

StoneBaby Sat 19-Jan-13 20:02:21

IC great news. You now know which GP to go and see with the children smile

CP ouch!

DS was all disapointed this morning when he realised that it did not snow again and that what was left from yesterday melted.

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Mon 21-Jan-13 22:42:35

Where is everyubody? Out enjoying the snow? Hope so!

Climbingpenguin Mon 21-Jan-13 23:03:38

I'm here, we've had DH's birthday on Saturday and his new job started today. Two days a week I shall be on duty 6am-7:30pm. Plus I was unwell Thurs night until yesterday (couldn't quite get my asthma to get back to normal, so no runs). Technically had/have a cold but as it's not in my sinus's I'm pretty happy with it.

Today went alright and even made a pretty tasty meal. Then as soon as DH got in, I went climbing, dragged myself up a 6b+ and led a 6b with multiple rests.

We are cold. Boiler packed in on Friday night. No central heating or hot water (including shower). We do have some fan heaters and someone coming round in the morning so <fx> otherwise I have ask someone to use their shower again.

DSs skin is now rash like down to his nappy area. Will make another appointment in the morning and hopefully get seen quickly. He is also teething, did anyone else ever find a link between eczema and teething or this just a random co-incidence?

I don't know what is happening with sleep, but they are both sleeping in till nearer 7 atm and DD is still having naps (thought they would stop when she got better, although she still does have a cold). I know it won't last so enjoying it while I can. DD still woke three times last night (DS only twice and the second time, fed and went straight back to sleep - I'm taking over some of the night co-sleeping duties again). Although DS with teething has been having a long waking session somewhere in the night, thankfully last nights was at 10:30. One night he was awake for 4 hours! I need to spend more quality time with DD

Hope everyone is well and warm.

CP glad you're feeling a better - wow to the climbing! Ugh to the lack of heating, hope it gets sorted pronto. And bah to the rash, although yay to the later wake-ups!!

DD's been loving the snow. She also loved her first hour flying solo at nursery today. Next week she'll do a 2.5 hours session and the following week she starts proper. The combination of strict (but gently enforced) rules and personal empowerment and exploration looks like it's going to be great for DD.

Bit knackered today. Blimmin' post nasal drip was more responsible for me being awake last night than DS was. The humidifier is being brought into play - hopefully that'll help all of us as DH and DS are both similarly afflicted.

stoofadoof Tue 22-Jan-13 21:30:46

<quick wave>

StoneBaby Tue 22-Jan-13 21:58:41

IC great news on the settlings session gone smoothly

CP I hope you've enjoyed a hot shower

I nearly had a heart attack when looking at travel prices to go toIreland for a wedding this summer - flights will cost £850 for the 3 of us shock then addcar hire then hotel it would be £1,000 for a 4 days break shock So now we need to decide what to do confused

Waves to all

SconesForTea Wed 23-Jan-13 14:54:35

SB wow that will be an EXPENSIVE few days. Do you really want to go? You could make it more of a family holiday, stay for longer than four days....? As the flights are the most expensive part. Or just bow out gracefully, I'm sure they will understand.

IC great news on the nursery settle. It seems around three is the perfect time to start them with no tears (I know a few friends' three YO who have started their free hours lately and loved it). Maybe I should reconsider sending DD2 when she turns 2 as I did with DD1. I am sure that DD1 enjoys nursery and is happy there, but she STILL says she doesn't want to go.

How are you doing CP? You sound like superwoman. Is your boiler fixed? Brrrrrr. Your poor things. What a time for it to pack up. How have you kept the DCs warm? Ours packed in last winter for a few days and it coincided with a cold snap, we borrowed some oil-filled radiators or I don't know what we'd have done. Temp in the whole house was 10 degrees and it felt like a freezer.

How is DH getting on with the new job? And how are you coping (early days obv) with the long, solo parenting days? Is there anything DH can do for you, on the days when he's at home (is he WFM the other days?)? Can he take over lunch duties for instance and you take the hour off to yourself? Well done, anyway. <applauds>

DD1 enjoyed the snow, went sledging with DH on Sunday while I painted the kitchen ceiling yet again - it is like the Forth bridge - third coat and it still looks patchy, but sod it, I am NOT doing it again. She went down a few times with our friends' DD and then on her own shock This is a very hilly area and it was a long old hill she went down. I would not have let her but DH is very laissez-faire with these things. She came back crying and wet through, as I thought she would (it was snowing the whole while) but my goodness, she slept well that night.

I feel I cannot rouse myself to be a good homemaker this week. I can't think what to cook (except I am planning to make a ginger cake, mmmm), I should be sorting out old kitchen stuff right now but I am on the internet. I feel tired and listless. But I did get out the play-doh for the first time yesterday (I usually make DH play with the play-doh - I hate it) and today did stickers and an activitiy book with DD1. I'm sure you all do things like that all the time with your DCs, but I don't. I mainly do housework and cooking and they follow me around whingeing blush So I feel absurdly proud of myself for being a proper mum for once.

SconesForTea Wed 23-Jan-13 14:55:44

Aargh meant to start with Happy Birthday to rainbowweaver's DD! WOW can you believe that we are turning three already?!

SocietyClowns Wed 23-Jan-13 15:09:10

Scones In our house dh is Mr Entertainer and I usually ignore the children until they find something to do themselves grin.

ClimbingPenguin Wed 23-Jan-13 15:15:13

we had some fan heaters dropped off by the estate agents. That shower yesterday was soooo nice.

I've had a few days like that Scones, stuck in the house realising I haven't really done that much with her. DD didn't like the snow until I realised she needed two pairs of trousers, two pairs of socks, two tops, cardi, puddlesuit, massive coat and two pairs of socks. Then she was fine until she took her gloves off.

The idea is when the nursery stops DH will rejig his hours so I can have 3 hours to myself including going to a women's only badminton session on thurs mornings <fx>

I made some well good falafel the past two days. Finally gave in and deep fried them rather than shallow frying. Instead of normal salad did shallot, broccolli, tender spring greens, peas, sweetcorn, red pepper, sunflower and sesame seeds, lemon juice, tomato puree, garlic. Just slightly cooked so it was quite sweet. Served with pitta bread and hummous.

Happy Birthday rainbowweaver DD!!!

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Wed 23-Jan-13 23:21:37

Sounds like a good patch for virtually all (post-nasal drips and rashes excluded sad) - long may it continue, especially as we reach the birthday season (for mums and 'babes', as I recall).

Happy birthday RW's DD.

Good luck CP with the heating and the childcare changes. Keep giving yourself a pat on the back and a break.

Well done Scones with the playing. I'm very good at making up jobs so that I don't play much as I'm rubbish at it. Trying very hard to play more and do less jobs.

I've just booked our Summer holiday I think (waiting for confirmation) and am ridiculously excited. <Must not tell DS1 until confirmation arrives.> This has cheered me up - I've been worrying excessively about what to do with work. Can't decide whether to a)do nothing and stick out the 3 days a week (accompanied by unhappy kids and guilty mum) until DS2 goes to school, at which point it will become a bit easier and we'll appreciate the money I'm still earning; b)drop down to 2 days a week. This would help me accommodate the hospital appts in 5 depts in 3 different hospitals in 3 different counties that I am currently juggling for the boyshmm and help the boys to have less childcare, which they currently detest; c) change my days of the week but lose my flexibility to work back missed hours from hospital appts by working the end of the week so that DH could do childcare on his short day on a Friday. Answers on a postcard please... (and if someone could actually make the decision for me, that would be great!)

ClimbingPenguin Thu 24-Jan-13 08:42:59

I guess the question is, what you want to be doing when they go to school?

SocietyClowns Thu 24-Jan-13 11:28:36

Survival What would be the long term impact if you drop down to two days? Would you lose status and the possibility to increase your hours again at a later point? Could you do 2 1/2 days with the half day worked flexibly to allow for appointments?
I think you have a good set up at the moment so I can see why you'd rather not rock the boat.
Dd1 currently goes into after school care twice a week and isn't madly keen on it. Once dd2 starts in the school nursery there for three days a week I will try to work my 2 1/2 days within school hours on those days and do some of the paperwork in the evenings.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 24-Jan-13 15:16:32

Sotu difficult to choose for you, I am a "in the moment type" (don't make plan) so seeing that you and the boys are unhappy, I would drop to 2 days and deal with the consequences later. But I do do things mostly differently that the norm and on my gut feeling too. So I am probably not the one to follow...
Actually what your gut feeling is telling you?
Can you make a list of pros and cons of all the situations to help you be clearer?

SB That is expensive! can you drive (ferry?). It is an other sign that our babies are growing: full price air plane tickets!

CP or should I call you spider woman? I am in owe. My bum gets challenged with the gravity and won't get up the wall even if the rest of me wants to. <hmm DH is still laughing at that one, BTF he did say "let go everything to test the rope">

IC Good luck with the eczema and nasal drip and all.
DD2 says "me like school me" almost everyday. It is lovely when they want to go.

DD2 has had a change; something clicked (even school said so shock). I think she passed the terrible 2 (FX and a lot of wishful thinking there). She is starting to talk more (even if it is still mostly gibberish) the vocabulary she is using increase and is usually part of a mock up sentence. She has finish her fussy eating stage, will almost eat anything, including roquette shock and hot curry. She is mostly civil with others children.
Basically she is lovely and can wrap everybody around her little finger. If you tell her off she will bat her eyelashes, smile and come to kiss you. I can see troubles in the future, especially because it works so well on DH <and I must admit on me a bit too blush>

soc are you feeling better after the flu?

<waves>

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 24-Jan-13 16:31:40

forgot to say thanks for the Bday's whishes for DD1. <she is lovely too, I like 7-8 yo!>

DD2 is calling her teacher "mami" which means mum in romanian confused may be I should be concerned (according to IABU)? or not grin.

StoneBaby Thu 24-Jan-13 21:02:57

mous it seems that your DD2 and my DS were slow bilingual speakers grin Great news for you tho.

SocietyClowns Fri 25-Jan-13 10:25:17

mous grin grin that your dd2 is finding her voice! My dd1 made a massive leap from barely talking and using few words (due to glue ear and very poor hearing in her case) at 3 to chatting away happily in sentences at 3 1/2. Now I can't shut her up grin

rainbowweaver Fri 25-Jan-13 23:22:47

sotu also agree with mous on listening to your gut. Also a gut person, though I then also try to figure out what the absolute worst case scenario would be if I then went with my gut and if I can live with it I go for it (or if i persuade myself it's unlikely to happen). smile

Thanks for the birthday wishes here too! I caught the fb ones first, and only these here today. Been a very hectic week, and was away on business all last week.

Going to sneak an early happy birthday to ic's DD now that it's almost midnight!

SconesForTea Sat 26-Jan-13 08:23:16

Happy birthday to IC's DD! Have s wonderful day. Hope you have had some decent sleep IC.

We had an undisturbed night last night for the 1st time in a week. Put DD2 in the spare room and left her to it. After squalling at 10pmish as usual, she went through to 7am. Hurrah! Oh, the difference.

StoneBaby Sun 27-Jan-13 10:19:45

scones great news on the sleep

I'm suffering today as I'm hungover. I was at a retirement do yesterday and my body is now feel the 8 hours drinking! blush

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